Monkey

General humor & jokes. Share funny photos and jokes. Must be "R" rated or below.
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Hid out on a tropical isle

To wile away his while

Tennis and swimmin'

With big legg'ed wimmin'

Now monkey was livin' in style
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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Big beach ape

Kicked sand in his face

Monkey got to pump up

And retake his place.



Monkey girls

Oogle ape, yahoo!

Monkey no like

So he goes boo-hoo.

Grabs a coconut

From nearby tree

Conked the ape

Girls hug monkey with glee.
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

YeahChonsi!! WTG
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

Dear 4Rum, my heart strings you pluck,

To find you, has been my good luck,

You are quite a find,

You're one of a kind,

So with me, you are now stuck,



Smooches dahlink!!

pant pant
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Samantha wrote: Dear 4Rum, my heart strings you pluck,

To find you, has been my good luck,

You are quite a find,

You're one of a kind,

So with me, you are now stuck,



Smooches dahlink!!

pant pant


Well stuck is a form of stick

Sticking with you is no trick

You're smart and pretty

And oh so witty

You're certainly my top pick

:yh_kiss
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

chonsigirl wrote: Big beach ape

Kicked sand in his face

Monkey got to pump up

And retake his place.



Monkey girls

Oogle ape, yahoo!

Monkey no like

So he goes boo-hoo.

Grabs a coconut

From nearby tree

Conked the ape

Girls hug monkey with glee.


Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay for some help we been wishin'

Yours is a welcome addition

I love your wit

Stay for a bit

Monkey might take you fishin'
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Well monkey's certainly smilin'

Seems more folks are pilin'

Onto the yacht

For what might get caught

NOW our party is stylin'
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Let's take 'er to sea for a sail

The good frigate Abigail

With party favors

Invite all the neighbors

We'll start us a "Monkey Tale"
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

We'll have ale from a flagon

From adventure not laggin'

Just one initiation

Your imagination

In search of unicorns and dragons
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

WOO HOO.......... er.... I mean YOHO!

Might be a good place to mention

While monkey LOVES the attention

If you board the yatchitwill

Pro'bly get naughty-cal

Just know your arm he IS wrenchin'

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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Making a banana shake

Monkey some attention needs,

More then food and fun for him,

A little rub down as he feeds.

Shake cools you down,

Give your back a rubba rubba,

Girl monkeys make you

Feel hubba hubba!
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

So pull up a keg all me hearties

Let monkey teach you to party

Cast off inhibition

Fun is our mission

So board NOW and don't be tardy

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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Pirate monkey looking for crew

Shangai beauties for you know who.

Monkey another tactic try,

Before the girls all slip by.

Lay in the stores

Aboard that tug,

Banana daiquiris maybe

That we all can chug.

Pearls from the sea

Some dubloons or more,

Entice us girls

A little more.
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

.......uh, carful in shakin' his 'nanner

Monkey aint' known fer his manners

Make woody his peg

He'll dry hump yer leg

While givin' yer koochikoo ganders

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4rum
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Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

chonsigirl wrote: Pirate monkey looking for crew

Shangai beauties for you know who.

Monkey another tactic try,

Before the girls all slip by.

Lay in the stores

Aboard that tug,

Banana daiquiris maybe

That we all can chug.

Pearls from the sea

Some dubloons or more,

Entice us girls

A little more.


So you've caught on to the little pirate

Your imagination, he inspire it

But be understandin'

If you load his cannon

He's not afraid to fire it!!!!!
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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

A heart ho-ho

Give monkey in glee,

Watching pretty girls

Ship out to sea.

Monkey need

To give more than thanks

Or girl monkeys mutiny

And he walks the plank!
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Lay on dak'ris, 'ritas an' rum

No matter where yer from

Welcome a board

While we're still moored

Let's wait for Samantha to come

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4rum
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Monkey

Post by 4rum »

She's a spritely an' comely lass

I'll tell you this from my past

Can't leave her behind

Hope ya'll don't mind

('Sides, she'd kick my ass)

:yh_rotfl
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

...wait....wait................siiiiiiiiiiiiiigh............visualizing here...........WOW!!!

Shipmates, bikinis and booze

Sounds like a heck of a cruise

Might be some fishin'

But my intuition

Thinks 'feedin' time at the zoo'
4rum
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Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Samantha!!!!!!get yer cute little knickers in here..........
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

Hey, I'm finally on board,

I'm looking for a reward,

While all monkeys dance,

And hope for romance,

I'll polish Sir 4Rum's Sword!!

Yummy!!:-4

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Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

Welcome aboard koochikoo!

I see you like chocolate too!

But please inform me,

Where Tasweigia be,

Or else, just give me a clue.
4rum
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Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Samantha wrote: Hey, I'm finally on board,

I'm looking for a reward,

While all monkeys dance,

And hope for romance,

I'll polish Sir 4Rum's Sword!!

Yummy!!:-4


.......ulp.........hunh........whew...........er..........um........i'm going to my room now...
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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Sailing to and fro

With Monkey below

The girls jib the sails

As monkey wails.

"To Monte Carlo we go"

Weak aye-aye heard from below,

Girls know how to cruise

Monkey's got 'nuttin to loose.
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Nomad
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Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2005 9:36 am

Monkey

Post by Nomad »

I like monkeys ! :-6

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I AM AWESOME MAN
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abbey
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Monkey

Post by abbey »

Nomad wrote: I like monkeys ! :-6You're supposed to do it in rhyme Gonads. :rolleyes: :p
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

Monkey barfed up his banana,

All the while eyeing Miss Hannah,

Chonsi looks charming,

While Snooze is disarming,

Then he'll move on to Diannah!
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

abbey wrote: You're supposed to do it in rhyme Gonads. :rolleyes: :p


Great retort!!

What a sport,

Now our games we won't abort!

:guitarist
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

4rum wrote: .......ulp.........hunh........whew...........er..........um........i'm going to my room now...


When 4Rum goes to his room,

Samantha sense the gloom,

Come out Sweetie Pie,

I'll ply you with Rye,

Our antic will then resume.

(He's a shy little bugger at times!!)
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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Getting out hook and bait

Snooze and Chonsi justy can't wait

For Arnold and Clancy to once more

Get down below and man the oars!

With her pirate spyglass held high

Sweet little Chonsi looks to the sky.

"Oh Snooze, I believe that there is hope,

Over there, please hand me that rope!"

Arnold and Clancy hanging on the raft,

Sit right back for a hearty laugh.

But their guffaws last none too long,

As that old sea gull flies along.

Chonsi had caught that bird with ease

A never a creature wanting to tease,

Let it loose after it gave it's word,

To fly over the raft and leave that t***.

"Yo-ho-ho" Snooze shouts in glee

As Sam does a jig by the azure sea.

Chonsi takes a peep in her little spyglass,

As seagull dives the raft for one last pass.
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Samantha, I just got your note

Oh so happy you wrote

Take it from me

I'll gladly be

Your little man in the boat :eek:
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

The skipper is drunk as a monkey

He's missing his favorite bunky

Her 'puter is broke

That aint no joke

'Cause he's a Samantha junky
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

As skipper Ol' Monkey must check

Stowaways are hiding he expects

If you're going to slip

On board a ship

Make sure it's not the 'poop deck'
4rum
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Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

The ladies had never looked cuter

Decked out sunning their hooters

But where is our Sam

First mate of the pram

And what of her unruly 'pooter'
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

4rum wrote: Samantha, I just got your note

Oh so happy you wrote

Take it from me

I'll gladly be

Your little man in the boat :eek:


There is nothing "little" about you,

You leave me smiling, you do,

But now that I'm back,

Our rhyming won't lack,

Let's get the rest of the crew!
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

Where are Chonsi and Snooze?

I think they took off with the booze,

Now Monkey is tanked,

He want's to be "spanked,"

While Sammy gives 4Rum some news!

:D
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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Ears all perked up

At the sounds of some news

Chonsi is waiting

Hurry up Snooze!

Monkey wanna listen

As Sam speaks sublime,

Nothing is better

Then the monkey gossip vine!
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

chonsigirl wrote: Ears all perked up

At the sounds of some news

Chonsi is waiting

Hurry up Snooze!

Monkey wanna listen

As Sam speaks sublime,

Nothing is better

Then the monkey gossip vine!


Your idea of a checkin

Is wonderful I reckon

Little gossip vine

To see who's on the line

And each can see our beckon
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chonsigirl
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Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Laughing with glee

Monkey talk we speak,

Gossip all day,

No time for monkey play.

*passing banana daquiri your way*
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

Last night in a game of poker

Snooze fell asleep but we woker

Seems the anty

Required her panties

In her 'pat hand' was a joker
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chonsigirl
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Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2005 8:28 am

Monkey

Post by chonsigirl »

Monkey joker handed the deck,

"Come on girls, what the heck!"

Girls have cards up their sleeves,

Monkey no clothes left, watch that breeze!
Samantha
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Monkey

Post by Samantha »

I hear that there's a gamin'

One that there's no shamin'

I'll dance with you Sir,

Will you make me purr?

Unless you think I need tamin'
4rum
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 11:27 am

Monkey

Post by 4rum »

chonsigirl wrote: Monkey joker handed the deck,

"Come on girls, what the heck!"

Girls have cards up their sleeves,

Monkey no clothes left, watch that breeze!


Monkey DOES feel a draft

Feels if fore, feels it aft

Lost his britches

To you witches

While you all laughed and laughed :D
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