prayer by JivesHotsuace

Wolverine · Post by **Wolverine** » Sun Sep 04, 2005 6:32 pm

I promise never to yell in class and I promise not to talk in line.

I promise i will not throw things or hit or punch or kick anyone.

I promise not to have any temper tantrums and always be good.

I will set a good example for the children because i am the Teacher.

I am the Teacher.

i am the teacher

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Sun Sep 04, 2005 7:05 pm

Now you can write that on the board 100 times Wolfy................

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Sun Sep 04, 2005 9:09 pm

I just had my first sub assignment last Friday and had to give a stern lecture to a class of third graders about respect. Mind you - I am not a cool sub. The kids were allowed to do a special Friday thing with sitting in front of a light and reading poetry. The 2nd kid to get up left in a stream of tears because 2 kids laughed. This rankled me to no end. I turned on the lights and gave them the "die bit-ch die" look and proceeded to tell them what respect means. AND - I told them I would not allow ANY disrepect toward another person. If they chose that route they could sit with their nose on their desk until the end of the day.

Jives and Chonsi - where are you????

Wolverine · Post by **Wolverine** » Sun Sep 04, 2005 9:17 pm

hey how's BTS?????

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Sun Sep 04, 2005 9:28 pm

He waaaayyyyy overdid it yesterday. He is recovering today - thanks for asking :-4

BTS · Post by **BTS** » Mon Sep 05, 2005 5:28 am

I just had my first sub assignment last Friday and had to give a stern lecture to a class of third graders about respect. Mind you - I am not a cool sub. The kids were allowed to do a special Friday thing with sitting in front of a light and reading poetry. The 2nd kid to get up left in a stream of tears because 2 kids laughed. This rankled me to no end. I turned on the lights and gave them the "die bit-ch die" look and proceeded to tell them what respect means. AND - I told them I would not allow ANY disrepect toward another person. If they chose that route they could sit with their nose on their desk until the end of the day.

chonsigirl wrote: Now NV you can write that on the board 100 times after Wolfie gets er done:wah: ................

(edited by BTS)

SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Are you chewing gum?

BILLY: No, I'm Billy Anderson.

SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?

FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?

SYLVIA: Your name on this report card.

TEACHER: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake.

SAMMY: You can't fool me, Teacher... snakes don't have feet.

HYGIENE TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?

JOSE: Don't bite any.

TEACHER: If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have?

CLASS COMEDIAN: Big hands!

We polish the Polish furniture.

He could lead if he would get the lead out.

A farm can produce produce.

The dump was so full it had to refuse refuse.

The soldier decided to desert in the desert.

The present is a good time to present the present.

At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum.

The dove dove into the bushes.

I did not object to the object.

The insurance for the invalid was invalid.

The bandage was wound around the wound.

There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

They were too close to the door to close it.

The buck does funny things when the does are present.

They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.

To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number.

I shed a tear when I saw the tear in my clothes.

I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt

~author unknown

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Mon Sep 05, 2005 5:34 am

nvalleyvee wrote: I just had my first sub assignment last Friday and had to give a stern lecture to a class of third graders about respect. Mind you - I am not a cool sub. The kids were allowed to do a special Friday thing with sitting in front of a light and reading poetry. The 2nd kid to get up left in a stream of tears because 2 kids laughed. This rankled me to no end. I turned on the lights and gave them the "die bit-ch die" look and proceeded to tell them what respect means. AND - I told them I would not allow ANY disrepect toward another person. If they chose that route they could sit with their nose on their desk until the end of the day.

Jives and Chonsi - where are you????
Here NV! Well, I think you did well to talk to them about respect. Remember when subbing, you do not have to follow all the teacher's instructions to the letter. If something they suggest does not seem a good idea, toss it out for one of your own. The reward for the class should be done by the teacher themself, not the sub. If they have too much free time, take out those multiplication tables and division for that grade level, and give them busy work to keep their minds and hands busy.

hotsauce · Post by **hotsauce** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 2:46 pm

omg...how funny! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I NEEDED THIS TODAY!

Wolverine · Post by **Wolverine** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 3:25 pm

glad i could help.

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 7:53 pm

Best kid story of the day..................

I wrote a bathroom pass for two lovely innocent 12 year old girls who were gone a long time. The school secretary was walking by and caught them writing some really bad graffiti in the bathrooms, black markers in their hands. They both protested they were innocently trying to erase such bad things on the wall, and cried in the office all day their innocence until their parents picked them up!

Ted · Post by **Ted** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 7:54 pm

nvalleyvee:-6

I remember giving that same lecture many times over my career. They should actually put it in the curriculum. I'm sure it gets given every year by every teacher. LOL

Shalom

Ted:-6

Ted · Post by **Ted** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 8:00 pm

nvalleyvee:-6

I loved being the principal when some poor child was sent to the office for telling the teacher to "f___o___". First you ask them to repeat what they said-now that's torture. Then you ask them to dial their home. When mom answers you say now tell your mother exactly what you said--torture doesn't even come close to describing it. You talk about squirming. LOL

No other punishment needed.

Shalom

Ted:-6

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 8:03 pm

It's even better when the kid speaks another language, and they don't believe you can too. I called home yesterday and told a parent how rude his child was to me in class, all in Spanish. The kid walked in this morning and ignored me, like I was a brick in the wall-didn't say a peep all day. Won't be rude for awhile I think.

:wah:

Ted · Post by **Ted** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 8:14 pm

chonsigirl:-6

I love it. LOL

Shalom

Ted:-6