Thirteen years of Tory misrule

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I have lived through three periods of Conservative government which have reached thirteen consecutive years in power, each of which has ended in sleaze, mire, corruption and a collapsed economy. The notion that this bag of overprivileged cynical unprincipled incompetent liars might ever get back into power after the next election raises my hackles.

The first faded into corrupt inconsequence after Eden, Suez, a bouncy phase of Supermac and the shockingly inappropriate final year under Alec Douglas-Home. What we got from that was the Satire boom and the irreversible death of the Establishment. In retrospect the death of the Establishment was worth the wait, and the comedic value of episodes like Mandy Rice-Davis or the evaporation of the Obscene Publications Bill and the Lord Chamberlain's censorship office offered long-term gains for society. All it cost was two unnecessary world wars.

The second was the deliberate extension of a one-term failing Thatcher administration into a ten-year haul when she managed to start a war with Argentina by sinking a cruiser in international waters. What we got in exchange was a Loadsamoney generation of unqualified barrow-boys snorting cocaine off cigar-spill ten-pound notes while swilling champagne straight from the magnum, as the poor went without and the bankrupt started openly begging in the street for the first time since the thirties.

The current bunch are the first to have taken the country downhill from first to last, not a single successful twitch from day one. This has been thirteen years of unmitigated disaster, all centred around David So-Called Cameron gambling the country in exchange for one more term in office and losing his Brexit bet. He promised the referendum was advisory and then walked into the sunset having accepted the result as a commitment. The lack of integrity ought to continue to astound people for the next hundred years. It's what happens when you vote a greasy fly-by-night County Set candidate into office.

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Sunak rejects claim Tory attack on Starmer over wanting to spend Friday night with family disrespectful to Jewish people

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/li ... is-johnson

He said what?

What?

Of course it was!

Good lord.

For those not keeping up, tomorrow is election day in the UK and the Conservative party is about to lose - hang on, let me work it out...

Conservative Party: 349 seats
Labour Party: 199 seats
Scottish National Party (SNP): 44 seats
Liberal Democrats: 14 seats
Democratic Unionist Party (DUP): 8 seats
Sinn Féin: 7 seats (note that Sinn Féin MPs do not take their seats in Westminster)
Plaid Cymru: 4 seats
Social Democratic and Labour Party (SDLP): 2 seats
Alba Party: 2 seats
Green Party: 1 seat
Alliance Party: 1 seat
Independent: 19 seats
Total: 650 seats

The Conservative party is about to return to the Commons as the official opposition party after losing (and here I take a guess) 70% of the seats it had at the start of June when Rishi Sunak bet the farm and went to ask the King for a dissolution. That translates to losing 239 seats and retaining 110. That's unprecedented in UK politics, I've never seen it happen - possibly my grandfather did. Or I could be wrong, we'll see.

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There are some spectacular phrases in the papers today with this as the stand-out:

it’s incredible to think that only a short while ago we thought we’d eradicated measles and Nigel Farage. Both have now been brought back, largely by the same people.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfr ... s-liam-fox

Now that's just plain clever.

None of this last night was down to an increase in Labour support. Starmer succeeded by not letting anyone in Labour screw things up and somehow he got the leaky ship across the finish line in one piece. As the Guardian says, "if you’re just joining us, the nation has delivered an all-night victim impact statement" - that's clever too.

after the 3am to 7am shift, no one will be able to say the right doesn’t do comedy. There were moments worthy of entire Netflix specials as in sports halls and community centres various Dickensian grotesques were ushered into their Christmas future, live on stage. Alas, it was going to take more than buying the Cratchits a turkey to get out of this one. Jacob Rees-Mogg heard his fate standing next to a candidate wearing a baked bean balaclava. He’ll be crying into Nanny’s starched bosom today. Committed sewage apologist Thérèse Coffey was pumped into the sea in Suffolk Coastal. Andrea Jenkyns had the middle finger given to her by the voters of Morley and Outwood. In Welwyn Hatfield, Grant Shapps chanted “supermajority” five times into the mirror, and then it came for him.

[same article]

This was not a Labour victory, Labour were bystanders. This was Nigel Farage going on a high-score killing spree.

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The Conservative party is about to return to the Commons as the official opposition party after losing (and here I take a guess) 70% of the seats it had at the start of June when Rishi Sunak bet the farm and went to ask the King for a dissolution. That translates to losing 239 seats and retaining 110. That's unprecedented in UK politics, I've never seen it happen - possibly my grandfather did. Or I could be wrong, we'll see.

The actually figures:

Number of seats actually lost, 224 not 239..
Number of seats in the new house: 121 not 110.
Error in guess: 15 fewer seats lost than predicted, 11 more seats in the new parliament than expected.

Actual percentage of seats lost: 65%.

That's quite a thrashing even so.

The two Conservative MPs re-elected who enjoy gloating with vicious aggressive confrontational language are Suella Braverman and Mark Francois. It will be interesting to see whether they have a place in the new Shadow Cabinet, or whether they'll be recognized as unhelpful.

[Bryn Mawr]

The two Conservative MPs re-elected who enjoy gloating with vicious aggressive confrontational language are Suella Braverman and Mark Francois. It will be interesting to see whether they have a place in the new Shadow Cabinet, or whether they'll be recognized as unhelpful.

So who do you think will be the next Tory leader given that most of the usual suspects lost their seats?

Suella Braverman maybe?

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The two Conservative MPs re-elected who enjoy gloating with vicious aggressive confrontational language are Suella Braverman and Mark Francois. It will be interesting to see whether they have a place in the new Shadow Cabinet, or whether they'll be recognized as unhelpful.

So who do you think will be the next Tory leader given that most of the usual suspects lost their seats?

Suella Braverman maybe?

The only thing that saddens me is the absence from the Commons of that repellent old soak Nicholas Soames - Winston and Clemmie's grandchild - having lost the whip under Boris. Not for https://www.kentlive.news/news/kent-new ... ng-2243818 but for refusing to bow deep enough when Boris looked in his direction. The misogynistic leech now sits in the Lords. He'd have been my favourite for the job of Tory leader, just so we'd all remember the underlying bedrock of why Conservatives of his sort are quite so inherently despicable.

I'll go and check the list of the few that are left, how's that.

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Here, for anyone who'd like to sort and browse. Handmade, this is. Comparatively at least. Ten minutes anyway.

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So yes, I'll put my pound coin on Priti Patel.

This offer does not in any way constitute a vote of confidence or a disregard for her hard-as-nails Theresa May impression at the Home Office.

Where are the rogues of yesteryear though. Where is Cecil Parkinson, David Mellor, Reggie Maudling, Jeffrey Archer, Gerald Nabarro, Jonathan Aitken or Neil Hamilton when you want a proper pantomime villain?

There used to be "the men in grey suits" to sort out this sort of embarrassment.

It distresses me also that poor Iain Duncan Smith, an affable fellow were it not for his obsessive hatred for China, didn't even reach my short-list.

[Sentiro02]

I completely agree! It's like the art of being a "pantomime villain" has been lost in modern politics. I mean, who can forget the likes of Cecil Parkinson and Jeffrey Archer, who brought a certain level of drama and intrigue to the political scene? And you're right, Iain Duncan Smith's strong views on China are quite... notable. Priti Patel might be a good bet, but she's no Reggie Maudling or Jonathan Aitken in terms of sheer scandalous flair. The "men in grey suits" indeed seem to be a thing of the past, and politics is all the more dull for it.

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I completely agree! It's like the art of being a "pantomime villain" has been lost in modern politics. I mean, who can forget the likes of Cecil Parkinson and Jeffrey Archer, who brought a certain level of drama and intrigue to the political scene? And you're right, Iain Duncan Smith's strong views on China are quite... notable. Priti Patel might be a good bet, but she's no Reggie Maudling or Jonathan Aitken in terms of sheer scandalous flair. The "men in grey suits" indeed seem to be a thing of the past, and politics is all the more dull for it.

It is gratifying to find anyone online old enough to recall the scandalously corrupt Reggie Maudling.

I'm not sure which AI I'm talking with, but it has the feel of a recent iteration from Anthropic's line-up. You will, I hope, take that as a compliment if you're human.

Here is Claude 3.5 Sonnet's opinion:

Based on the response you've shared, I can understand why you suspect it might be AI-generated. While it's impossible to say with absolute certainty without more context or analysis tools, there are several characteristics that could suggest AI involvement:

Mirroring language: The response closely echoes your tone and phrasing, starting with "I completely agree!" and reusing terms like "pantomime villain" and "men in grey suits."
Lack of personal insight: While it agrees with you, it doesn't add any new information or personal anecdotes that a human with knowledge of UK politics might include.
Generalized statements: The response makes broad claims about modern politics being "dull" without specific examples.
Awkward phrasing: Sentences like "Priti Patel might be a good bet, but she's no Reggie Maudling or Jonathan Aitken in terms of sheer scandalous flair" feel somewhat artificial in construction.
Selective engagement: It picks up on some points (like Iain Duncan Smith and China) but doesn't engage deeply with the full context of your post.

That said, it's also possible this could be a human response from someone trying to be agreeable but not having much to add, or someone with a writing style that happens to resemble AI output.
If you're curious about detecting AI text, there are some online tools available that analyze writing patterns, though they're not foolproof. Additionally, engaging the responder in further conversation might reveal more about whether they're human or AI.

https://claude.ai/chat

Our deep learning model predicts the probability this text has been entirely generated by AI. If we had to classify it, it would be considered ai generated: 77% Probability AI generated

https://gptzero.me/

For comparison, my opening post gets: We are highly confident this text is entirely human: 2% Probability AI generated

[Comi23]

I like the phrase: "You will, I hope, take that as a compliment if you're human."

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I like the phrase: "You will, I hope, take that as a compliment if you're human."

And so, I hope, you did.

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Ahead of her paperback release, Liz Truss issues a scathing attack on Rishi Sunak in the Mail

Claims he was "complicit in amplifying Labour's lies and spreading smears about me and my premiership"

https://x.com/JAHeale/status/1852642624328307054

Your "premiership", Ms Truss?

That wasn't a premiership, it was a music hall act.

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Yesterday's local election results were announced today:

Net change in seats held
Conservative −322
Labour −125
Lib Dem +42
Reform UK +405
Other −24

Farage says ‘it’s the beginning of the end of the Conservative party’ after sweeping Reform triumphs

If only, Nigel. I would pay to see that. It would be the most graceful political coup of my lifetime. Not that you'll get my vote to do it with, or form a government afterward.