Need Mother-In-Law advice!

greydeadhead · Post by **greydeadhead** » Tue Apr 05, 2005 8:50 am

Welll St. Stormz...

1. Cut Hubby's apron strings. he is a big boy and can support his wife.. not his mother.

2. Tell MIL that you don't appreciate her gossiping about you and the you would appreciate it if she would stop .. immediately..

3. Get ahold of your best friend and work this out.. if you guys are truely best friends she will know that the MIL is a conniving bitc*

ummm.. that would be good for starters...

Good Luck and may the force be with you.. you gonna need it..

smithy87 · Post by **smithy87** » Tue Apr 05, 2005 9:11 am

You need to have a word with her. Don't feel guilty about doing it because she's been ill because that didn't stop her running her mouth about you. After all you've done all you can to help her and that's the thanks you get. She must've known your friend would tell you?

And if I found out my mother had been mouthing about my hubby just for bitching sake then I'd be having a word aswell. So you husband is going to have to understand your feelings and back you up.

pink princess · Post by **pink princess** » Tue Apr 05, 2005 9:15 am

hmmmm

for me i reckon id have a serious talk to ure partner and see how he feels about it, if he agrees with you try and get him to say something/do something, otherwise at least shes not ure mum!!

this is gonna sound seriously cruel as well but.... at least ure relationship will outlive her so it wont always be like this, just as long as the situation isnt getting in the way of ure relationship.......

devist8me · Post by **devist8me** » Tue Apr 05, 2005 9:17 am

I agree with everyone's suggestions. Wanted to add that by confronting her, you may not shut her up, but atleast she knows you will confront her when you do hear things. Continue to confront her about anything you hear for awhile, maybe it will stop or atleast slow down.

Good luck! It sounds like a mess.

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Tue Apr 05, 2005 9:18 am

Hey, she's got the energy to bad-mouth you, then she's got the energy to take a talking-to. I have a similar "relationship" with my soon-to-be MIL. Thankfully, she lives 800 miles away. If she lived on the same street, we'd either move, or I'd be in jail for assault. (Not reccommended.)

Absolutely give her a dressing down. Tell hubby how it hurts you and you are going to deal with it and he needs to back you up. Period. Nothing can cause more resentment than this sort of situation.

As for your friend, if she is a good friend, she will know that the old bat is full of crap and won't even give what she says any credence. Good luck, and let us know how it turns out. :yh_bigsmi

Post by **kensloft** » Tue Apr 05, 2005 12:03 pm

Your MIL sounds like a wannabe bully. Like all bullies they tend to think that if you don't stand up to them then you are their prey. I would suggest that when confronting her it be done in the presence of those that have been the recipients of her lies. It is really comical to watch them squirm as they look for the ground to open up and swallow them so that they don't have to face their duplicity.

A few episodes like this makes for them taking time to reassess their lying natures. They can run but they can't hide. She'll become the laughing stock of the town if she doesn't change her ways. Give her the wake up call that she needs. She'll, eventually, thank you for it. So will your husband.

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Tue Apr 05, 2005 1:55 pm

Even well-meaning mother-in-laws can sometimes be intrusive.

Yours sounds horrible.

How is your hubby's relationship to his mom? Does he have any siblings?

His Number 1 relationship should be to you as his wife. His is a grown man.

Do talk to him about your feelings. His reaction will tell you where he stands.

You sound like you have done all you can to be a good daughter-in-law. This should give you a certain amount of satisfaction.

You will not be able to change the lady in question. She sounds set in her ways. But you can tell her you do not appreciate her behavior and you do not have to tolerate it. You are grown too.

Good luck! :-6