Weeders Dates...or possible dates

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Sun Jan 27, 2008 5:19 pm

You know I always try to keep you all posted on my dates. Which are few and far between, but always memorable. When last I reported, there was the legally blind man, who drove the golf cart... whose nose hairs met inthe middle of his nose... who became the stalker....

Thanks to the restaurant Im working in, I have more of a social life at night.

And thanks to the fact that the owner put me behind the bar two nights a week, the males that come in get to take a gander at me. I have found that these men become much more outgoing after 5 or 6 glasses of wine. This past week a man who looks just like Beetlejuice has come in 4 nights in a row. I knew he was interested in me, as hes repeated the story about how hes a private investigator at least nine times, hes on the verge of divorce, and hes making plans to return to our sleepy little town to live. Yesterday he came in for linch and dinner. At lunch he made certain to ask if I would be the bartender that night, and then said he would be back for dinner. Now remember, its my job to be nice to this man, and of course I want him to leave me a great tip. So, I listen to him repeat himself, quite patiently over and over again. What I really would like to do ( of course I never would) is to grind 2 or 3 Advil Pms into his Chardonnay..... call a cab, and get the cab driver to dump him on his front lawn. Last night he kept saying too bad I HAVE to work, because he would really like to buy me a drink, and have me sitting with him. Everytime he repeated this, I told him I love to work, and that my job was exactly where I wanted to be. My ambivalance really seems

to excite him. as he has PROMISED me he will be back this Tuesday night for dinner. I keep thinking how great it would have been to be able to be this nonchalant in my youth, towards males I WAS interested in, because it really works like a charm. I was thinking that this Tuesday night, when he says how awful it is that I HAVE to work, instead of going out with him...... I will calmy tell him, that I would rather have sand poured in my eyes, than to spend the evening with Beetlejuice, hearing about his PI cases. Im thinking Ill probably get an engagement ring:wah: Other than this the only other social highlight for me this winter was a blind date with a retired professional who came up to my chin, couldnt fit in the booth at the restaurant, and had very small hands that reminded me of a squirrell. He was.... very nice. Wanted me to travel with him to the Orient this spring. Strictly as a companion. Ive been ignoring his e mails. I know its mean, but I have to. Whenever I think of him, hes hunched over in a ball, feverishly eating nuts,

Well thats it on the dating scene kids.... But weve just begun a new year, and you never know, Ill keep you posted.

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Sun Jan 27, 2008 5:23 pm

I will calmy tell him, that I would rather have sand poured in my eyes, than to spend the evening with Beetlejuice

Oh, I am laughing at that.

:wah:

Tell him your calnedar is booked up until 2012, and who knows what will happen then?

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Sun Jan 27, 2008 5:33 pm

Beetlejuice is not so bad. :wah::wah:

[QUOTE]I will calmy tell him, that I would rather have sand poured in my eyes, than to spend the evening with Beetlejuice, hearing about his PI cases. [/QUOTE]

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sun Jan 27, 2008 5:49 pm

Im seeing another side of Weeder now........

Dontcha know us men love a challenge, as you rightly spotted.

I expect you are too nice to be really disdainful, smiling when you give the put down line doesn't work.....Beetlejuice can see the natural warmth in your eyes.....and knows thats how the game works.....you say no, just to make it more interesting.

Upend a plateful of your hottest clingiest comestibles in his lap.....that should do the trick.....but dont smile.

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Sun Jan 27, 2008 7:59 pm

Carla.... dont you remember Beetle Juices hair??? And how little his head was. when he was sitting in the waiting room to see the devil????

Bruv..... If someone came along who interested me... Id probably be stammering like a 17 year old. As things stand, it is only my sense of humor that keeps me going in the face of all the interested paries, that I am not interested in. Im sorry... but I AM holding on for Robert Carlyle, Anthony Hopkins, Sean Connery or Daniel Day Lewis, to find me.:wah:

DING A LING A LING..... Oops gotta go. ANOTHER DATE!!!! wITH A WEALTHY TOBACCO FARM OWNER. Who calls me Mam.. Next Sunday night ... Dinner.

Hes a VERY NICE MAN. Nostrils look good... He CAN see well enough to drive.. and he doesnt work at all. So, at least we dont have to talk about his daily grind. Ill keep you all posted:)

Patsy Warnick · Post by **Patsy Warnick** » Sun Jan 27, 2008 10:10 pm

Weeder

This Beetlejuice guy enjoys the challenge. Whether its your wit - or ?? he enjoys this as a challenge.

You'll have to change your MO on this guy - if you want to deflate the game, and still keep him as a good tipping customer.

Start wearing jewlery - talk about the jewlery - like someone else is adoring you.

Keep the tip

Patsy

KB. · Post by **KB.** » Sun Jan 27, 2008 10:15 pm

Bartenders are my favorite people.

I'm thinking about planning a coast to coast road trip in the fall. I'm a good tipper.

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 1:26 am

Im with you weeder, doesnt sound like he is ever going to float your boat, not if you think he looks like that and has the personality of a damp squid.

Hang on in there........Your bound to get an interesting guy through the doors soon.

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 3:48 am

Thank You for the picture Chezzie. I loved that movie.

pantsonfire321@aol.com · Mon Jan 28, 2008 6:24 am

weeder;765877 wrote: You know I always try to keep you all posted on my dates. Which are few and far between, but always memorable. When last I reported, there was the legally blind man, who drove the golf cart... whose nose hairs met inthe middle of his nose... who became the stalker....

Thanks to the restaurant Im working in, I have more of a social life at night.

And thanks to the fact that the owner put me behind the bar two nights a week, the males that come in get to take a gander at me. I have found that these men become much more outgoing after 5 or 6 glasses of wine. This past week a man who looks just like Beetlejuice has come in 4 nights in a row. I knew he was interested in me, as hes repeated the story about how hes a private investigator at least nine times, hes on the verge of divorce, and hes making plans to return to our sleepy little town to live. Yesterday he came in for linch and dinner. At lunch he made certain to ask if I would be the bartender that night, and then said he would be back for dinner. Now remember, its my job to be nice to this man, and of course I want him to leave me a great tip. So, I listen to him repeat himself, quite patiently over and over again. What I really would like to do ( of course I never would) is to grind 2 or 3 Advil Pms into his Chardonnay..... call a cab, and get the cab driver to dump him on his front lawn. Last night he kept saying too bad I HAVE to work, because he would really like to buy me a drink, and have me sitting with him. Everytime he repeated this, I told him I love to work, and that my job was exactly where I wanted to be. My ambivalance really seems

to excite him. as he has PROMISED me he will be back this Tuesday night for dinner. I keep thinking how great it would have been to be able to be this nonchalant in my youth, towards males I WAS interested in, because it really works like a charm. I was thinking that this Tuesday night, when he says how awful it is that I HAVE to work, instead of going out with him...... I will calmy tell him, that I would rather have sand poured in my eyes, than to spend the evening with Beetlejuice, hearing about his PI cases. Im thinking Ill probably get an engagement ring:wah: Other than this the only other social highlight for me this winter was a blind date with a retired professional who came up to my chin, couldnt fit in the booth at the restaurant, and had very small hands that reminded me of a squirrell. He was.... very nice. Wanted me to travel with him to the Orient this spring. Strictly as a companion. Ive been ignoring his e mails. I know its mean, but I have to. Whenever I think of him, hes hunched over in a ball, feverishly eating nuts,Well thats it on the dating scene kids.... But weve just begun a new year, and you never know, Ill keep you posted.

Weeder, sorry but i have to ask: why did you give out your email.

Good luck i'm sure there's a decent guy out there for you just around the corner.... i'm sure of it :-6 .

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 7:22 am

Its not my e mail adress, its through a newspaper box address.

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 9:28 am

weeder;766106 wrote: Its not my e mail adress, its through a newspaper box address.

too smart a cookie to fall for that malarky aren't cha Weeder:-6

Uncle Kram · Post by **Uncle Kram** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 9:46 am

I'm curious about the guy with hands like a squirrel. Did he show you his nuts?.

Tell Beetlejuice you're the moll of a Lesbian gangster. Mind you, ....that might make things worse.

OK...I'll shut up now........

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 10:10 am

Chezzie;766149 wrote: too smart a cookie to fall for that malarky aren't cha Weeder:-6

You bet I am.... Chezzie... Its a rare individual that gains access to " The Weeder":wah:

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 10:13 am

Uncle Kram;766172 wrote: I'm curious about the guy with hands like a squirrel. Did he show you his nuts?.

Tell Beetlejuice you're the moll of a Lesbian gangster. Mind you, ....that might make things worse.

OK...I'll shut up now........

No, Krammy he did not " Let his nuts out of the bag" Thankfully.

But given the chance, I KNOW he would have put them right on the table.

That is why I say " Nuts to this guy, and his little squirrell hands too.

Uncle Kram · Post by **Uncle Kram** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 10:17 am

weeder;766192 wrote: No, Krammy he did not " Let his nuts out of the bag" Thankfully.

But given the chance, I KNOW he would have put them right on the table.

That is why I say " Nuts to this guy, and his little squirrell hands too.

Just thank your lucky stars that he didn't have a bag of "Cheesy Wotsits" :yh_giggle

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 10:18 am

:yh_rotfl

The Rob · Post by **The Rob** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 12:26 pm

You remind me why I don't miss the dating scene at all.

Weeder, your descriptive comments are gold. :wah:

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Mon Jan 28, 2008 1:01 pm

I get reminded twice a year.... on my two annual dates. I do it to reassure myself, that I am still alive. I do it so that I can fully appreciate another 6 monts ALONE, The dates always remind me of how great I have it.