I need important advice!

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Cass
Posts: 1198
Joined: Thu Nov 25, 2004 1:00 pm

I need important advice!

Post by Cass »

Well, it sounds like you need a breather from this guy ~ some space to either let yourself heal from the hurt, or to see if the feelings continue.



What can you do to occupy you so you are not always dwelling on him, any hobbies, friends, part time job, school?



Keep your cool when you are around him, don't be nasty or anything, there is nothing wrong with him knowing you are hurt that your relationship did not work - don't hide that, but just be reserved and keep your head together.



Is there any other boys that you like? you never know, if he sees you perhaps starting a friendship with another boy - it make shake him up a bit.



Let us know how it is going and try not to feel too bad, I know you are hurting, but truly all of us go through things like this and it is part of how we grow and learn, sometimes life sucks, try to make the best of the worst times.
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Tombstone
Posts: 3686
Joined: Mon Aug 02, 2004 12:00 pm

I need important advice!

Post by Tombstone »

Hollywood18 wrote: He's a guy who's hard to approach, and you never know what to expect from him, but once you approach him, you can get good or bad results. I don't know what I should do. Can someone give me some advice?

P.S. Sorry for writing a book here. :p


Hi Hollywood18,

Sorry to hear about this. I usually don't post much in the relationship area, but figured you could hear from a "guy's perspective". I hope I don't step out of bounds!

You spent a lot of time defending him. This is a red flag.

My comment is: He's not really interested in a relationship with you. It appears that you were the instigator of most things in this friendship and short relationship. That's not good!

You deserve better! You want to find a person who is equally enthused about the friendship - then relationship. The guy needs to be kind, supporting, caring, and aware of you and your needs: Chivalry in the 21st Century? Yes, it still exists.

Namely, he needs to be intensely interested in you! If this is the case, then be intensely interested in him and figure out the little things that make him tick and happy. (Believe me, they are small and easily fulfilled.)

If you raise your bar and expect the best, that's what you'll get from your guy. If you don't - then he'll treat you accordingly. (Unfortunate, but true.)

A man who has found his partner and is fulfilled by her will do anything for her.
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