Chinese Proverbs

General humor & jokes. Share funny photos and jokes. Must be "R" rated or below.
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crazygal
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Chinese Proverbs

Post by crazygal »

Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Man who run in front of car get tired.

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Man who run behind car get exhausted.

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Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

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Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

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Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

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Man with one chopstick go hungry.

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Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money

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Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

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Panties not best thing on earth! But next to best thing on earth.

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War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

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Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

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Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

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It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

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Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

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Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

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Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

*~**~*~*~! *~*~*~*~*

Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.



Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

they are good ,



man with bald head ,waste no time looking for hair brush :-3
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crazygal
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Post by crazygal »

jimbo;658947 wrote: they are good ,



man with bald head ,waste no time looking for hair brush :-3


:wah:
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spot
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Post by spot »

Look not at what is contrary to propriety; listen not to what is contrary to propriety; believe not what is contrary to propriety; post nothing which is contrary to propriety.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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spot
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Chinese Proverbs

Post by spot »

The true poster is troubled by his own lack of ability, not by the failure of others to appreciate him.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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spot
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Post by spot »

When faced with the opportunity to practise benevolence do not give precedence, even to moderators.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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spot
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Post by spot »

I once spent all day thinking without taking food and all night thinking without going to bed, but it did me no good. I'd have done better to have spent the time learning.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Chinese Proverbs

Post by spot »

The discriminating member does not admire a poster on account of the opinion he supports, neither does he dismiss what is said just because of who posted it.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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spot
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Chinese Proverbs

Post by spot »

A craftsman who wishes to practise his craft well must first sharpen his tools. You should, therefore, seek the patronage of the most interesting members and make friends with the most benevolent posters on any board where you happen to be posting.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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spot
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Post by spot »

Advise your friends to the best of your ability and guide them properly, but stop when there is no hope of success. It is far worse to be snubbed than to be ignored.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
mikeinie
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Post by mikeinie »

Man who go to bed with ichy bum wake up with smelly finger.
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YZGI
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Post by YZGI »

Spot, are you by any chance chanting right now?
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spot
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Post by spot »

YZGI;659094 wrote: Spot, are you by any chance chanting right now?


Ommmmmm.

Come on, join in, Chinese Proverbs are great fun.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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YZGI
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Post by YZGI »

spot;659097 wrote: Ommmmmm.



Come on, join in, Chinese Proverbs are great fun.
Okay here is a YZGIZESE Proverb:



Never make fun of some one smarter than you, they may just prove it to you.
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YZGI
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Post by YZGI »

I forgot:





OHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM breath

OHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM breath



Thats all I can handle.



gasp

gasp
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spot
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Post by spot »

In handing out infractions I am no different from any other moderator. But if you insist on a difference, it is, perhaps, that I try to get the parties not to post contentiously in the first place.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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minks
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Post by minks »

Man who cooks carrots and pees/peas in the same pot is very unsanitary :D (of course as soon as ya have to type this one it becomes a proble, this is better spoken)
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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spot
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Post by spot »

Tombstone quizzed his moderators about running ForumGarden. They answered "Let the administrator administrate, the moderators infract, the guests lurk and the membership post". Tombstone said "Splendid! Truly, if the administrator did not administrate, the moderators did not infract, the guests did not lurk and the membership did not post, then regardless of bandwidth we would have no traffic!"
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by minks »

spot;659135 wrote: Tombstone quizzed his moderators about running ForumGarden. They answered "Let the administrator administrate, the moderators infract, the guests lurk and the membership post". Tombstone said "Splendid! Truly, if the administrator did not administrate, the moderators did not infract, the guests did not lurk and the membership did not post, then regardless of bandwidth we would have no traffic!"


:yh_hypno :yh_questn :yh_wait :yh_ttth you're kidding!
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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Post by YZGI »

spot;659135 wrote: Tombstone quizzed his moderators about running ForumGarden. They answered "Let the administrator administrate, the moderators infract, the guests lurk and the membership post". Tombstone said "Splendid! Truly, if the administrator did not administrate, the moderators did not infract, the guests did not lurk and the membership did not post, then regardless of bandwidth we would have no traffic!"
I printed this proverb out so I could study it to get to the true meaning. Thanks Spot.
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Post by spot »

YZGI;659143 wrote: I printed this proverb out so I could study it to get to the true meaning. Thanks Spot.


Ommmmmmmm.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

Post simply. It is enough that the language one uses gets the point across.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

Those who post of what they experience are the most informative. Next come those who post of what they understand. Next again come those who dutifully google to keep a thread balanced when vexed by difficulties. The rest of us, despite making no effort to support our opinions even after being vexed by difficulties, outvote the smart-arses by reason of number every time.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

The discriminating poster stands in awe of three things. He is in awe of the administrator. He is in awe of the moderators. He is in awe of the words of those who have posted before him. The inconsiderate poster, being ignorant of the administrator, does not stand in awe of him. He treats the moderators with insolence and the words of those who have posted before him with derision.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

There are three things the right-thinking poster should guard against. As a recent arrival when the newness is great and acquaintance limited he should guard against premature prominence. Later, while acquaintance is being moulded and confidence increased he should guard against bellicosity. In maturity when tag-teaming has become automatic and factions set in stone he should guard against acquisitiveness.

I'm by no means convinced that anyone else is going to join in, crazygal, but I'm doing by best.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

When sharing a thread with one's seniors one is liable to three errors. To post without an implied invitation is rash; to hedge when directly addressed is demeaning; but to reply without considering each senior's intention is unadulterated folly.

You're all sods, leaving me in here on my own like this. I shall go and pour another drink.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by YZGI »

spot;659611 wrote: When sharing a thread with one's seniors one is liable to three errors. To post without an implied invitation is rash; to hedge when directly addressed is demeaning; but to post without considering each senior's intention is unadulterated folly.



You're all sods, leaving me in here on my own like this. I shall go and pour another drink.
That last part sounds a bit like unadulterated folly to me.:D
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Post by spot »

koan once considered creating an account on a different board. Someone said, 'But could you put up with their uncouth ways?' to which she replied, 'Once a true poster settles amongst them, what uncouthness will there be?'
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

The Administrator said, "I have never coveted applause. That's why my posts are so interesting."
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

The right-thinking poster said, 'Did I know? No, I didn't. I saw the question and my mind was a complete blank. I nibbled at it from both sides until I got everything out of it, that's all.'
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

spot said, 'Inspiration refuses to touch me and Google offers no clue. Today I really must log off.'
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

There are four things the true poster abhors: he abhors opinion, certitude, inflexiblity and egotism.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

Crazygal! Thank goodness you've shown up. Nobody else will play your game and I'm livid with the lot of them.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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crazygal
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Post by crazygal »

Once bitten by a snake, you are even frightened by a rope that resembles a snake.
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

crazygal;660064 wrote: Once bitten by a snake, you are even frightened by a rope that resembles a snake.


or a body part that looks like a rope or if your lucky a snake :D





i mean man who goes to bed with sex on his mind wake up with solution on stomach :D
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crazygal
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Post by crazygal »

Man who stand on toilet is high on pot. :wah:
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

man who represents himself in court of law ,has a fool for a client :thinking:
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Post by spot »

The Administrator said, 'To wrestle the wild grizzly into submission, fell grown buffalo with one blow of the open palm, throw together a successful barbeque and talk Jennifer Aniston into an unplanned night out together - these are trifles that give me no trouble.'
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

The Administrator said, 'It is fitting that we should hold newbies in awe. How do we know that established posters to come will not be the equal of the present? Only when he reaches three hundred posts without distinguishing himself in any way can one say, I suppose, that he does not deserve to be held in awe.'
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Chookie
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Post by Chookie »

Before inserting my proverb, I must issue a disclaimer. I am only here because it's absolutely throwing it down outside, I'm not sleeping in a tent in this weather and this hotel has an internet cafe. Any, herewith the proverb:-

Man with kilt up run faster than woman with trousers down.
An ye harm none, do what ye will....
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spot
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Post by spot »

Chookie;660357 wrote: Before inserting my proverb, I must issue a disclaimer. I am only here because it's absolutely throwing it down outside, I'm not sleeping in a tent in this weather and this hotel has an internet cafe. Any, herewith the proverb:-

Man with kilt up run faster than woman with trousers down.
Let nobody say the Scots are not a canny folk!
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

One has to admire a well-turned post, but what is important is that one should strive to attain its polish when replying. One cannot but be pleased by constructive compromise, but what is important is that one should pare back to essentials in turn. Even the discerning poster can do nothing with those who admire but will not emulate or who are satisfied but refuse to seek common ground.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

The Administrator said, 'ForumGarden could function without moderators, but it would be a sad waste of time if the posts were never read.'
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

Only when the board is temporarily quiet does one realize that Australian women are always the last to stop talking, bless them.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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Post by spot »

It is not required that an administrator excel at moderating, or that a moderator excel at posting, or that a poster excel at understanding.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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SuzyB
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Chinese Proverbs

Post by SuzyB »

spot;660740 wrote: It is not required that an administrator excel at moderating, or that a moderator excel at posting, or that a poster excel at understanding.


Just as well :rolleyes: :p
I am nobody..nobody is perfect...therefore I must be Perfect!





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spot
Posts: 41798
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 5:19 pm
Location: Brigstowe

Chinese Proverbs

Post by spot »

SuzyB;660746 wrote: Just as well :rolleyes: :p


Look, I can do romantic chinese proverbs too when I want:

It's not that I don't think of you, but you live so far away!

You don't really think of me, or you would know there is no distance.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
User avatar
spot
Posts: 41798
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 5:19 pm
Location: Brigstowe

Chinese Proverbs

Post by spot »

The discerning poster was asked "which do you like more, this member or that?" and replied "This member exaggerates all the time, while that member understates the case". "Does that mean you like that member more, then?", they pressed. The discerning poster logged off saying "There is little to choose between them".
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
User avatar
spot
Posts: 41798
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 5:19 pm
Location: Brigstowe

Chinese Proverbs

Post by spot »

The mark of a discerning poster is that one cannot disagree with what the membership says about him.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
User avatar
spot
Posts: 41798
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 5:19 pm
Location: Brigstowe

Chinese Proverbs

Post by spot »

If the true poster is neither affable with newbies nor frank with established posters, or seems lacking in composure, then he is attempting a joke.
Nullius in verba ... ☎||||||||||| ... To Fate I sue, of other means bereft, the only refuge for the wretched left. ... Hold no regard for unsupported opinion.
When flower power came along I stood for Human Rights, marched around for peace and freedom, had some nooky every night - we took it serious. [Fred Wedlock, "The Folker"]
Who has a spare two minutes to play in this month's FG Trivia game! ... My other OS is Slackware.
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