magenta flame;599297 wrote: Child care In my opinion is ok for up to 2-4 hours a day. If you are planning to put your child into care from six in the morning to six at night? As a parent you should be shot.
100% agreed.
If I were in a position where someone left such a young child with me I would take full advantage of the situation.
Teach the child Latin. Or Polish! Even French.
Oooh what fun you could have with those parents.
;)
Child care
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WonderWendy3
- Posts: 12412
- Joined: Thu Nov 09, 2006 7:44 am
Child care
I agree with you Magenta...I have been on both sides of that fence. I put my oldest son in daycare for a day and only because we were out of town, he was 4 years old, while I was there I watched these women handle babies like they were just objects on a assembly line...no feeling, no cuddlin'...I started to cry when I left there. My son was older and I knew it was just for a few hours, didn't keep me from worrying about him though...trust me.
I was very fortunate to have been able to stay home with my children for 10 years. I did have to work when my oldest son was little, but Thankfully not for long. (but for 2 LONG years to me-I was one of those mothers that wanted to know everything about my baby's day...and he was 15 months old when he started going to a baby-sitter).
We struggled and I still don't have fancy things, but my children will and always have been first in line...I home-schooled my oldest when I knew that he needed the one on one attention. I wish I could do that now. I figure I'll have a life in about 6 short years...whooo hoooo....just kidding...I have a great life...:-6 :-4
I was very fortunate to have been able to stay home with my children for 10 years. I did have to work when my oldest son was little, but Thankfully not for long. (but for 2 LONG years to me-I was one of those mothers that wanted to know everything about my baby's day...and he was 15 months old when he started going to a baby-sitter).
We struggled and I still don't have fancy things, but my children will and always have been first in line...I home-schooled my oldest when I knew that he needed the one on one attention. I wish I could do that now. I figure I'll have a life in about 6 short years...whooo hoooo....just kidding...I have a great life...:-6 :-4
Child care
I'm a stay at home mom, but my kids both have participated in a Mother's Day out program. It didn't do them any harm in my opinion. One day a week they went and played with other kids their age from about 8 a.m. till bout 4 p.m. It gave me a day to schedule personal Dr's appointments, and other such errands.
"Girls are crazy! I'm not ever getting married, I can make my own sandwiches!"
my son
my son
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Betty Boop
- Posts: 16988
- Joined: Sun Mar 27, 2005 1:17 pm
- Location: The end of the World
Child care
I planned to stay at home with my two before they were born. Unfortunately life doesn't always turn out the way you plan! My first was eight weeks premature, this put a huge strain on our finances, the trips to the hospital were an hours drive every day and I wasn't allowed to drive. My husband at the time took a lot of time off work to drive me up and down when others friends and family members couldn't.
At the time my maternity leave was up and I had to inform the company whether I planned to return was the week my ex husband quit his job. :rolleyes: So, I had to go back to work, thats ok, I thought my son will still be being looked after by one of his parents. After a couple of months it became apparent we were sinking, fast.... My wage was not enough to pay the bills let alone buy groceries and clothes.
My ex husband had to go out to work otherwise we would have lost our house.
Luckily for me, my Mum and my Aunty shared the care of my son and he has a very special bond with them both now that doesn't detract away from my bond with him.
I worked for about twelve months in total before I had to give it up as I was hospitalised with severe eczema which was in fact due to stress and all the guilt I felt at not being there for my son. I remember twelve months of just 'existing' and feeling permanantly tired.
Child care wouldn't have been an option for us as we just couldn't have afforded it, there wasn't so much chlid care available back then anyway!
I would have gone for a childminder rather than a daycare centre though, the numbers of children are limited and a lot of our childminders here are raising their own children alongside having one or two extras, they just seem to get a bit more attention and love than the ones in the daycare in my opinion.
Luckily I was able to stay at home after having my daughter, but from the age of two and half she went to nursery two mornings a week and stayed on in the daycare for half a day one of those days, she needed the social interaction more than my son did and really enjoyed it. The break did me good to be able to go and get things done like doctors, dentist, clean right through the house without someone pulling out behind you or trying to help!
I guess its all about balance and what you feel happy with, but ultimately I think the children should be at home with Mum.
At the time my maternity leave was up and I had to inform the company whether I planned to return was the week my ex husband quit his job. :rolleyes: So, I had to go back to work, thats ok, I thought my son will still be being looked after by one of his parents. After a couple of months it became apparent we were sinking, fast.... My wage was not enough to pay the bills let alone buy groceries and clothes.
My ex husband had to go out to work otherwise we would have lost our house.
Luckily for me, my Mum and my Aunty shared the care of my son and he has a very special bond with them both now that doesn't detract away from my bond with him.
I worked for about twelve months in total before I had to give it up as I was hospitalised with severe eczema which was in fact due to stress and all the guilt I felt at not being there for my son. I remember twelve months of just 'existing' and feeling permanantly tired.
Child care wouldn't have been an option for us as we just couldn't have afforded it, there wasn't so much chlid care available back then anyway!
I would have gone for a childminder rather than a daycare centre though, the numbers of children are limited and a lot of our childminders here are raising their own children alongside having one or two extras, they just seem to get a bit more attention and love than the ones in the daycare in my opinion.
Luckily I was able to stay at home after having my daughter, but from the age of two and half she went to nursery two mornings a week and stayed on in the daycare for half a day one of those days, she needed the social interaction more than my son did and really enjoyed it. The break did me good to be able to go and get things done like doctors, dentist, clean right through the house without someone pulling out behind you or trying to help!
I guess its all about balance and what you feel happy with, but ultimately I think the children should be at home with Mum.
Child care
MY mum is a childminder but I agree that until school age at least kids should be at home with their mum and not away from them all day while their mum works. I could never do it. For the parents sake too, they do so much changing in the first 3-5 years of life, I wouldn't want to miss it. Mum stayed home with us and as I said child minded. She now only looks after kids before and after school though. You never know either when your child is too young to talk what sort of care they are really getting as they can't tell you if something bad has happened can they.
Child care
magenta flame;599297 wrote:
We used to shake our heads when the majority of mothers would bring their children in "who wanted to work" I once had a 1 month old and mum would just plop him there and leave without even a whisper. And she was the norm. But by golly would they be upset if you didn't have their children dressed and changed by the time they got there to pick them up. They didn't care how they were when they dropped them off but they expected you to gift wrap their kids to take them home.
On the other hand though there were the mothers who 'had' to work and you could see the agony in their faces..they never cared about what the child looked like they just wanted to hold them and hear about their day, we payed special attention to these kids because we knew mum would want to know everything about their day
I really only have one thing to say about your post. You seem to be separating the children and the care you give them based on the parents. If you are a childcare provider, it shouldn't matter who is dropping off the children. What should matter is what kind of care you're providing the child when they're with you. You can't change the parents or their lifestyle. If part of your job is to change the kids and make them clean and presentable before they leave for home, that's what you should do regardless of who's picking them up.
I only point this out because you seem to have resentment towards certain parents and not others, when in all reality, you probably didn't know very much about any of their circumstances since you said most only talked to you for 15 minutes a day.
Yes, it's a hard job, as most jobs are in the caregiver world. But do it well and that's what matters.
We used to shake our heads when the majority of mothers would bring their children in "who wanted to work" I once had a 1 month old and mum would just plop him there and leave without even a whisper. And she was the norm. But by golly would they be upset if you didn't have their children dressed and changed by the time they got there to pick them up. They didn't care how they were when they dropped them off but they expected you to gift wrap their kids to take them home.
On the other hand though there were the mothers who 'had' to work and you could see the agony in their faces..they never cared about what the child looked like they just wanted to hold them and hear about their day, we payed special attention to these kids because we knew mum would want to know everything about their day
I really only have one thing to say about your post. You seem to be separating the children and the care you give them based on the parents. If you are a childcare provider, it shouldn't matter who is dropping off the children. What should matter is what kind of care you're providing the child when they're with you. You can't change the parents or their lifestyle. If part of your job is to change the kids and make them clean and presentable before they leave for home, that's what you should do regardless of who's picking them up.
I only point this out because you seem to have resentment towards certain parents and not others, when in all reality, you probably didn't know very much about any of their circumstances since you said most only talked to you for 15 minutes a day.
Yes, it's a hard job, as most jobs are in the caregiver world. But do it well and that's what matters.
It is better to have your mind opened by wonder
than closed by belief.
than closed by belief.
Child care
I have experienced all sides of this issue.
Mother with child in day care, then children in private day homes.
I ran a dayhome for a number of years.
It was hell leaving my children behind.
And yes Mag like you I have seen both sides of the coin. I had parents who hated being apart from their kids, and I had others who had days off regularly (every second friday) and they still brought their kids to me like it was a regular working day. That broke my heart.
I eventually quit the business.
As for developed social skills bah! I am 40+ years old my mom was a stay at home mom and my social skills are so darn fine I could run for president of FG (ahahahaha huge joke there)
I think with this socializing BS we are messing with the natural progression of our children.
Pity some of us are forced to use child care.
Just my opinion.
Mother with child in day care, then children in private day homes.
I ran a dayhome for a number of years.
It was hell leaving my children behind.
And yes Mag like you I have seen both sides of the coin. I had parents who hated being apart from their kids, and I had others who had days off regularly (every second friday) and they still brought their kids to me like it was a regular working day. That broke my heart.
I eventually quit the business.
As for developed social skills bah! I am 40+ years old my mom was a stay at home mom and my social skills are so darn fine I could run for president of FG (ahahahaha huge joke there)
I think with this socializing BS we are messing with the natural progression of our children.
Pity some of us are forced to use child care.
Just my opinion.
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�
• Mae West
• Mae West