More on men

[valerie]

(These might have been around before gang, sorry!!)



Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car I will fiddle with a wire long after hypothermia, or heat stroke, has set in. AAA is not an option. I will win.

Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't, know where to start." We will then drink beer and break wind as a form of holy communion.

Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You're a woman. You never get as sick as I do, so for you this isn't a problem.

Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "cumin" or "tofu." For all I know, these are the same thing. And never, under any circumstances, expect me to pick up anything for which "feminine hygiene product" is a euphemism.

Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much, once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.

Because I'm a man, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole show looking for it (though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator).....applies to engineers mainly.

Because I'm a man, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about. The answer is always either sex, cars or football. I have to make up something else when you ask, so don't ask.

Because I'm a man, I do not want to visit your mother, or have your Mother come visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any more than I have to. Whatever you got her for Mother's Day is okay; I don't need to see it. And don't forget to pick up something for my mother too.

Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie. Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't....and if you are feeling amorous afterwards... Then I will certainly at least remember the name and recommend it to others.

Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine. With the belt or without it, looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look fine. Can we just go now?

Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2006, I will share equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest..... Like looking for my socks, or like wandering around in the garden with a beer wondering what to do.

This has been a public service message for Women to better understand Men.

[Carl44]

val you man hater you :wah:



i agree with all your points except the flu one nothing but nothing could make me ill enough to stay in bed



and i have more chance of my partnerbringing me a busty blond to my bed than a bowl of soup and there is no chance of that



and i do more than my fare share of everything and all the cooking





i have to concede that remembering what sue wears is not my strong point we went out last night and i dont have a clue what she was wearing

[Rapunzel]

[QUOTE=valerie] Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "cumin" or "tofu." For all I know, these are the same thing. And never, under any circumstances, expect me to pick up anything for which "feminine hygiene product" is a euphemism. [QUOTE]

My hubby's very good at this and will buy anything I need. He doesn't have a problem with that.

What bugs me is when I cook dinner and call him, he'll take 5 or 10 minutes to come to the table. But on the rare occasions that he cooks dinner, if you don't come the second he calls you he throws a wobbly and moans like he11!

The other thing is if I cook a really nice dinner and ask how it is, he'll say "alright". If its just an ordinary dinner, he'll say its "alright" and if I sometimes over cook it, so its a bit crisp, he'll say its "alright" too. :-5

Men! Lol! :wah: