Winnipeg airport

Grumpaz · Post by **Grumpaz** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 1:19 pm

This is hilarious. I wish I had the guts of this girl. For all of you out there who've had to deal with an irate customer, this one is for you. An award should go to the Air Canada gate agent in Winnipeg for being smart and funny, while making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo. A crowded Air Canada flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket on the counter and said "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." The agent replied, "I am sorry, sir. I'll be happy to try to help you,but,I've got to help these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?" Without hesitating, the agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone, "May I have your attention please, " she began, her voice heard clearly throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at Gate 14 WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to Gate 14." With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the Air Canada agent, gritted his teeth and swore "******* You!". Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry sir, you'll have to get in line for that too!"

Grumpaz · Post by **Grumpaz** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 1:20 pm

We went to the movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I

usually do because it feels a little roomier. Just as the feature was

about to start a blonde from the center of the row got up and started

working her way out.

"Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry,

oops, excuse me." By the time she got to me I was trying to look around

her and I was a little impatient so I said, "Couldn't you have done

this a little earlier?"

"No!!" she said in a loud whisper, "The TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE

PLEASE message just flashed up on the screen and mine is in the car."

Grumpaz · Post by **Grumpaz** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 1:21 pm

Children writing about the sea :

1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6)

2) Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all

round you, you are in continent. (Wayne age 7)

4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson.

She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

5) A dolphin breaths through an ******* on the top of its head. (Billy age

8)

6) My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.

(Millie age 6)

7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the

ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to

make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.

(William age 7)

8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do

mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)

9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always screaming

and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum, and my big sister has just

got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)

10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you

a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to

plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy

small. (Kevin age 6)

12) Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't go

down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)

13) On holiday my Mum went water skiing. She fell off when she was going

very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny.

(Julie age 7)

Uncle Kram · Post by **Uncle Kram** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 1:23 pm

I'd love to believe the first one was true Miz Grumpaz :wah:

minks · Post by **minks** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 1:25 pm

Bwahhh hawww hawww

woppy71 · Post by **woppy71** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 1:29 pm

Grumpaz wrote: This is hilarious. I wish I had the guts of this girl. For all of you out there who've had to deal with an irate customer, this one is for you. An award should go to the Air Canada gate agent in Winnipeg for being smart and funny, while making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo. A crowded Air Canada flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket on the counter and said "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." The agent replied, "I am sorry, sir. I'll be happy to try to help you,but,I've got to help these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?" Without hesitating, the agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone, "May I have your attention please, " she began, her voice heard clearly throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at Gate 14 WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to Gate 14." With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the Air Canada agent, gritted his teeth and swore "******* You!". Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry sir, you'll have to get in line for that too!"

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Oh, how i can relate to that!

ch4rlie · Post by **ch4rlie** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 1:36 pm

Grumpaz wrote: This is hilarious. I wish I had the guts of this girl. For all of you out there who've had to deal with an irate customer, this one is for you. An award should go to the Air Canada gate agent in Winnipeg for being smart and funny, while making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo. A crowded Air Canada flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket on the counter and said "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS." The agent replied, "I am sorry, sir. I'll be happy to try to help you,but,I've got to help these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?" Without hesitating, the agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone, "May I have your attention please, " she began, her voice heard clearly throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at Gate 14 WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to Gate 14." With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the Air Canada agent, gritted his teeth and swore "******* You!". Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry sir, you'll have to get in line for that too!"

i am in love. :-4

Rapunzel · Post by **Rapunzel** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 2:19 pm

Way to go Air Canada gal!

An irate chap walked up to a friend of mine and said quite brusquely "Call me a cab!"

She smiled sweetly and said "Okay . . . you're a cab!" :wah:

daBunnyWendy7 · Post by **daBunnyWendy7** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 3:51 pm

He he he heh heheheeh e wheeze...hack....he heehheehehe snicker!

Thanks SO much! HA HA. It's been another long day at cust. service at PHX sky harbor.Chuckle.Gotta laugh.Both posts GREAT

Wendy

weber · Post by **weber** » Tue Sep 05, 2006 7:56 pm

Do you feel safe with your Doctor? I wonder.....

Doctors' Comments On Patient Charts:

"Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year."

"On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely."

"The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993."

"Discharge status: Alive but without permission."

"Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful."

"The patient refused an autopsy."

"The patient has no past history of suicides."

"Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital."

"Patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days."

"Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch."

"She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night."

"She is numb from her toes down."

"While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home."

"The skin was moist and dry."

"Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches."

"Patient was alert and unresponsive."

Saved sum 4 later if you wish.

shelleybelle73 · Post by **shelleybelle73** » Wed Sep 06, 2006 1:56 am

:yh_rotfl

stoppit you guys.....

hee hee

daBunnyWendy7 · Post by **daBunnyWendy7** » Wed Sep 06, 2006 2:24 am

om Goooo harde har omGG hehehehehehehe snark

chOUgh,wheeze

oh MY

oh,pleeeeze DON't STOP, Miriam,YOU ARE truely priceless.

whew.that felt GREAT after a looooong day.AS often DO helped sad,Distressed psx at internat'l airport.DRAINING.HUMOR is GREAT.

Thanks!!!!