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Dr G,

I've had a major cybercrush on an advice columnist for about four weeks now. Even though he resides in another country and is younger than me, I simply cannot get him out of my mind. I have the most scandalous dreams about him every night. And in those dreams, I do *whatever* the good doctor asks of me. And more.

What do you think I should do about this?

Nomad wrote: Ok since you wont bash their heads in can you at least tell me why sneezer wont answer my pm s anymore ? Is our friendship over ? Gone kaput ? Can it be repaired ? Im not big on groveling but I could whimper a little I guess. Would that be the right direction to go or should I put my foot down and demand her friendship ? Ill abide by your advice. Thank you Dr.


I am sorry that this advice is a little late, but I would suggest that demanding anything from SC might have the opposite effect of what you might intend. It is my thinking that perhaps there are no actual problems between yourself and SC but that you are simply going through a particularly needy emotional state that will pass quite quickly, I wouldn't be too worried as you seem to be like 2 peas in a pod in many ways and perhaps this is a source of occasional friction, of course this is all supposition from across the atlantic, but in any case my main advice is to be friendly and as dignified as possiblle in all your dealings with each other. Of course if that doesn't work I could suggest UN mediation, though this can be a lengthy process, and might involve disarmament on all sides, the establishment of buffer zones, and the establishmnet of a stabilization force (perhaps the french, the danes would be unaceptable to snooze). I will look into it.

SnoozeControl wrote: Here's a vid showing mine and Nomad's relationship... I'm obviously the cat.




Charming, and yes, you are obviously the cat.

Nomad wrote: Am I too hard on you ? I asked you before if I should ease up, should I ? If I go too far with the teasing you have to let me know. Im not rigid. I can bend. I tease you because I adore you but I dont want to offend you either. Talk to me ! Im easy.


This is all good stuff, I forsee a complete resolution and UN sanctioned peace in weeks. I owuld also suggest that you offer SC some nice biscuits as this is always helpful.

SnoozeControl wrote: Hard and easy is good. No problems here.


Fair, I would say.

cherandbuster wrote: Dr G,

I've had a major cybercrush on an advice columnist for about four weeks now. Even though he resides in another country and is younger than me, I simply cannot get him out of my mind. I have the most scandalous dreams about him every night. And in those dreams, I do *whatever* the good doctor asks of me. And more.

What do you think I should do about this?


Another intriguiging development. I am quite sure that all such scandalous dreams and associated fantasies are entirely healthy and nothing to worry about, so I wouldn't worry too much. In all such cases I would say enjoy such daliances, if however they effect your sleep patterns or cause you to fall out of bed by accident then you can try some herbal sleep remedies, and maybe sleeping for a short period in a bouncy castle to avoid any nocturnal injuries. If the bouncy castle idea is impractical then perhaps a compromise would be to put something soft on the floor beside your side of said bed to avoid problems. I think I will have to read up on these cyber crushes as they have become a quite popular current topic, I think that much work has been done on this subject in Japan, however the sources may be unreliable, in any case I shall definelty look into it in case it is causing any patients with a source of discomfort.

Puleeeeeeze Dr. Galbally,

When I saw you responding to Nomad with comments about international situations and banning the bomb and the UN, of course I thought you were answering my urgent question concerning my blind date with the banker from Korea! Forgive my mistake.

Frightfully Fearful

Zapata wrote: Puleeeeeeze Dr. Galbally,

When I saw you responding to Nomad with comments about international situations and banning the bomb and the UN, of course I thought you were answering my urgent question concerning my blind date with the banker from Korea! Forgive my mistake.

Frightfully Fearful


I have waited till now to reply, as I was giving you some time in case there was more you'd like to share. i would say that for you date, you might want to be a little cautious with him, as I believe he may not be telling you the entire truth. As far as I am aware N. Korea is a communist state, and as such they wouldn't have bankers as we know them, though perhaps he helps mismanage some aspect of what passess for a financial ministry in that god-forsaken country. I may be becoming confused, but is this the Tin man? There is something about a pseudo banker from N. Korea doing the tin man that I find deeply amusing, though of course I don't mean to laugh at your romantic life or anything. Anyway, do let me know how its going. BTW, if you work for a defence contractor or the U.S. DOD or are on the NSA, or work as a cleaner for the CIA or anything you might want to get your date security cleared, you can never be certain nowadays.

Dear Dr. Galbally,

How do we fix that pesky middle east war thingy ?

Thank you.

Hi GB, old buddy, How you doin'?

I hope fine. I hope your holiday was fine.

I hope all your friends and family are fine.

They're feeding me well. . .

Ok, that should be enough. They tell me the guards only read the first few lines to see if there's anything interesting or SMUTTY.

Heelllppppp! They arrested me. They said I caused an international incident. I was very careful not to step on Yung June Moon on the dance floor, when we danced the cha cha. And when he said, what sounded like, "Ret's go for wok in moonright" I thought that was sweet or that he was hungry, but then he tripped me, made me fall right off my 6" stilettoes and he tried to take advantage of me. Well, I had to defend myself, didn't I? He probably wasn't a real banker anyway. Soooo, do you know any good defense attorneys?

Thanks for your help,

Stirring in Stir

*I was very careful not to step on Yung June Moon on the dance floor, when we danced the cha cha. And when he said, what sounded like, "Ret's go for wok in moonright" I thought that was sweet*





:wah: :wah: chuckle chuckle......

Please disregard the above statement Dr. Please.

Nomad wrote: Dear Dr. Galbally,

How do we fix that pesky middle east war thingy ?

Thank you.


Interesting question. In a word, difficult. I must think long and not too hard about this one. There are several issues to deal with. The current situation in Lebannon, the creation of a Palestinian state, normalization of arab relations with Israel, ending of the Iraq civil war, preventing the Taliban from re-emerging in Afganistan, stopping Iran from aquiring nuclear weapons (imperative that one), a way to deal with the rise in religious fanaticism, promoting some sort of equitable societies in places like syria, egypt, saudi arabia; and of course perfecting the recipie for the ultimate kebab.

Well the Kebab one is easy, there is a turkish place in London that does the greatest kebabs in the world, so I can work with whichever guy it is that does them to perfect that particular food product, the rest will require a little time.

Zapata wrote: Hi GB, old buddy, How you doin'?

I hope fine. I hope your holiday was fine.

I hope all your friends and family are fine.

They're feeding me well. . .

Ok, that should be enough. They tell me the guards only read the first few lines to see if there's anything interesting or SMUTTY.

Heelllppppp! They arrested me. They said I caused an international incident. I was very careful not to step on Yung June Moon on the dance floor, when we danced the cha cha. And when he said, what sounded like, "Ret's go for wok in moonright" I thought that was sweet or that he was hungry, but then he tripped me, made me fall right off my 6" stilettoes and he tried to take advantage of me. Well, I had to defend myself, didn't I? He probably wasn't a real banker anyway. Soooo, do you know any good defense attorneys?

Thanks for your help,

Stirring in Stir


Tricky, tricky, there is a lot of difficulty with the N. Koreans with the recent launch of their Tao Pe Dong II medium range ballistic missiles. Your government won't want your recent incident made public in case it causes a national outrage in the communist state, who tell their public that they are led by a legion of supermen, who shouldn't be able to get the crap kicked out of them by angry young american women. In this case it is likely that they will offer you a plea bargain, or perhaps now that you have some experience may commute your sentence if you agree to some covert surveillance opperations, which according to your own preference you may find either unsavoury or another great opportunity to dress up and go kick some other disrepuable, overly friendly, communists. If it does come to court then I suggest that you get Johnny Cochran, if he is out of your price range then you could ask that it be turned into a civil matter and brought before judge judy, she will no doubt give mr June Moon a good ticking off and award you damages for the shoe damage.

SnoozeControl wrote: Dear Professor Galbally,

Do you ever wear a white lab coat? Just a white lab coat? (Got pics?)


I havn't worked in a lab for quite some time now, though I'm sure I still have a few left, they aren't that sexy really, unless of course its a nubile young female scientist wearing them. Though perhaps you think differently. I could certainly never beat your pics in your flying uniform, trust me. Alternately I could get an aran sweater and do the wild irish man thing, grow me beard back and the hair etc, actually I must look at the picture gallery again and maybe update myself, I'm not doing the lab coat thing snooze, that would not be fun for anyone!

Nomad wrote: Please disregard the above statement Dr. Please.


Too late.

SnoozeControl wrote: An updated photo would be good... sprawled across satin sheets maybe.

Okay, I'll stop now. :rolleyes:


Well maybe in bed but only with the duvet up to me neck and one foot on the floor, I'm a good catholic boy.

Pinky wrote: Spoilsport. :-2


Please young lady, this is a proper, kosher, top quality councelling service and such like not a cheap excuse for quick thrills with my cyber friends (well alright it is a bit, but don't let on or they will shut us down they are so closed minded in the medical world).

Anyway, moving on.

SnoozeControl wrote: I used to try that one foot on the floor trick after a night of drinking but it still didn't stop the room from spinning.


You obviously didn't drink enough. After a particularly heavy night of drinking once I fell asleep with my head on the pillow but my two legs in a kneeling position on the floor. When I woke up I thought i had lost the use of them! (Again best not to mention that to anyone as it might call my ethical stance on practicing amateur pyschology into question)

SnoozeControl wrote: Your secret's safe with me.

Hey Val, did you see what Galbally just said?


Very good, I am encouraged by your willingness to keep the truth hidden for my benefit. I must go to bed now, long day. Night sc, and everyone.

SnoozeControl wrote: I don't wanna creep the poor boy out with my outrageous flirting and constant sexual innuendo. I'm old enough to be his very young and attractive auntie.


But Snoozie

You and I do it so well, don't we?

Dr. Dr. . . . come see your Aunties, young man :sneaky:

Pinky wrote: But you have such a lovely bedside manner..I'm sure the aunties will agree!


Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yes he does :sneaky:

cherandbuster wrote: But Snoozie

You and I do it so well, don't we?

Dr. Dr. . . . come see your Aunties, young man :sneaky:


Yes I must admit that I do enjoy the attention that I recieve occasionaly from the kind, pitying women of FG, what man wouldn't? But of course you understand that I must maintain my professional integrity at all times, (except of course for the times that I don't). Mrs, Buster, how have you been BTW? Its been a while since you popped in, I hope that you are well.

Pinky wrote: But you have such a lovely bedside manner..I'm sure the aunties will agree!


Thank you, my aim is always to please, but we can disucss that later.

Hamster wrote: Dear Doctor.... Please can you help??



Can you explain why men speak a completely different language to us ladies? And can you recommend a good translation text??



Thank you soooo much!




Yeah, I want those answers too!!

Hamster wrote: Classic phrases to translate (please) are:



"I'll call you tomorrow...."



"I feel the same way you do....."



and the classic:



"I really enjoyed our time together...."






I know I shouldn't laugh but I can't help it! Sorry



I'll call you tomorrow - don't forget one day to a woman feels like a week, to a man it's an hour. :rolleyes:



I feel the same way you do - well how do you know? have you told him?



I really enjoyed our time together - sorry even I'm stumped on that one! :wah:

Betty Boop wrote: I know I shouldn't laugh but I can't help it! Sorry



I'll call you tomorrow - don't forget one day to a woman feels like a week, to a man it's an hour. :rolleyes:



I feel the same way you do - well how do you know? have you told him?



I really enjoyed our time together - sorry even I'm stumped on that one! :wah:


Maybe he was just being polite ?

Guys think about you as much as you do about us.

You didnt come with a handbook ya know. :rolleyes:

Nomad wrote: Maybe he was just being polite ?

Guys think about you as much as you do about us.

You didnt come with a handbook ya know. :rolleyes:




You're right of course, I spent today with someone who bought a book to supposedly help explain a little more about the way women think



............mmmmmmmmmmm he could have just asked me!! :wah:

Hamster wrote: "I feel the same way you do"....I have a feeling you really like me..so I am off!








:wah: :wah: :wah:

Betty Boop wrote: You're right of course, I spent today with someone who bought a book to supposedly help explain a little more about the way women think



............mmmmmmmmmmm he could have just asked me!! :wah:




No. Bad idea !!!! The book is fine.









poor guy:rolleyes:

Nomad wrote: No. Bad idea !!!! The book is fine.









poor guy:rolleyes:


What do you mean poor guy!! I traipsed all over the city with kids in tow looking for this book.

I've never come across a man who enjoys shopping before! :-6

Betty Boop wrote: What do you mean poor guy!! I traipsed all over the city with kids in tow looking for this book.

I've never come across a man who enjoys shopping before! :-6






He enjoys shopping for books on how to understand women ?

No.

He doesnt.

He may like being with you.

But he doesnt enjoy that.

Ill be sending you a book on men now. :rolleyes:

Nomad wrote: He enjoys shopping for books on how to understand women ?

No.

He doesnt.

He may like being with you.

But he doesnt enjoy that.

Ill be sending you a book on men now. :rolleyes:


He doesn't enjoy what Nomad??

Hamster wrote: He he he now I have started a fire I am off to bed-gotta be up at 6am.



Have fun kids!!


Night Hammy! :-4



I'm off too, shattered!

Betty Boop wrote: He doesn't enjoy what Nomad??




I just meant he probably enjoys being with you so whatever your doing is cool. But he probably wouldnt pick looking for a book on women as his 1st choice. I think Im going to shut up now.

Nomad wrote: I just meant he probably enjoys being with you so whatever your doing is cool. But he probably wouldnt pick looking for a book on women as his 1st choice. I think Im going to shut up now.


:-6 Nomad it's ok, please never shut up!!!! :-4