Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

General discussion area for all topics not covered in the other forums.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster wrote: *Hammy clutches her card*

We are off to the pub... catch you later..and

NO COMMENT ABOUT LEEDS :mad:


Great, don't start any fights, have fun, be good.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;440327 wrote: Dr G...How do I deal with a whole month of the beer???

Any tips for alcoholic withdrawals?? :-3


First and foremost, get some Vitamin B6 into you, alcohol strips it out of your system. You have youngens so I don't think exercise is a problem though get some fresh yorkshire air into you, make sure that you are active enough in the day so that you are too tired to think about having any beer on the evenings, rediscover the cinema, have plenty of sex as its just as relaxing as drink and much better for you, don't fret or worry too much about things, its tempting. You will do fine, just do some thing else on the weekends, I know you are busy, but you can make time for yourself.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;458044 wrote: Dr G... How do I fit two houses worth of stuff into one??

Thanks!

Squashed from Yorkshire...:-3


This is the co-habitationthing isn't it? Well, firstly you probably have a lot of duplicate stuff that you both have, box up one lot and use the other, the attic is the obvious place for all that. If he is handy get him to put up some strong sheling and stuff for your books, films, music, general stuff like that. Make a determined effort to get rid of lots of the stuff that we all have that we just well have and never use, old clothes, books, bric a brac, there is bound to be some, but of course don't get rid of anything good or that you could use in the future, old magazines, newpapers, tv guides, childrens clothes that don't fit them, all can go to charity or friends, clean out all the nearly empty toietry bottles and bathroom stuff, old medicines, out of date tinned food, you would be amazed when you go through your stuff about how much of it just sits there like an unwelcome relative and never gets used. Again, if he is a handy fella, if you have a garden shed, clear that out as well, only keep what you use, don't let him bring copy books from when he was 12, or sega megadrive games, or that silly stuff us boys have if he is like that, but give him his own space too, he needs it as well. Take stock of what you have, what you use, what you want to keep, and what may also be worth keeping (especially books), with everything else be ruthess. A last tip, most of the space in the fridge and food cupbouard is taken up by packaging, not by food, get economcial and efficient on that front. Good luck.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
weber
Posts: 1821
Joined: Thu Mar 30, 2006 4:52 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by weber »

How do I say this? Are you a real Dr. or is this a witch hunt? I've never been doctored by you and if that is your real pic, I might like to be. Am I here? If I have a short memory, am I a witch?
miriam:yh_flower



Making the simple complicated is commonplace; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, that's creativity.

.................Charles Mingus



http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

weber;468249 wrote: How do I say this? Are you a real Dr. or is this a witch hunt? I've never been doctored by you and if that is your real pic, I might like to be. Am I here? If I have a short memory, am I a witch?


I am a chemist, (not a pharmacist) Masters Dregree only though, thoug when I get my PhD i will be a doctor of science alright, thats some way off at the moment though. I am certainly no witch, though I know one or two and I must say I quite like them. And yes thats my own picture as if I was gonna use a false one I would obviously pick a more obviously attractive guy, I am of course delighted that you are expressing an interest in my doctoring skills, but I must warn you that any legal difficulties that you encure as a result of my advice are already waived. I was never asked that before and I never though about it, wel its too late now.

As for your last 3 questions, can you remember the last thing you bought and how much it cost. If you can remember, you are fine. I am a scientist so you will have to ask pinky if you are a witch, if you are not you can try and pretend I suppose, halloween costumes are cheap at the moment.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;468253 wrote: :cool: may have got that one sorted doc!!! :wah:


Good, keep it up as they say.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;468255 wrote: Thanks!!! I can tell you have done this before? :thinking:


Yes indeed, 5 years in a 2 up 2 down cottage in Dublin. Mostly good so I can offer you some practical advice in that area, how to keep it going after 5 years you will need to talk to someone else I'm afraid.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;468273 wrote: :eek: :eek: *Snigger*


Quite.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Pinky;468276 wrote: Hiya Dr G!

Glad to see I'm now in charge of witch diagnosis!

3 telltale signs that you may be entering witchood....

1. You cackle at anything remotely funny

2. You try to take the hoover to the shops instead of the car

3. people tend to break out in a funny rash and develop a twitch in one eye after you got annoyed and pointed at them (though that might just be me):-3


Thank you dear, you will be invaluable in my latest "Find out if you are a witch service", I shall be calling on your talents anon.

As for now , I will have to say bon soir, have a good weekend, I will talk to you all soon, be nice to each other and as usual don't burn the surgery down when I am gone.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
weber
Posts: 1821
Joined: Thu Mar 30, 2006 4:52 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by weber »

Guilty as charged. Am a witch. Eye of newt....mwah...vundervul.:p :D
miriam:yh_flower



Making the simple complicated is commonplace; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, that's creativity.

.................Charles Mingus



http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

The surgery is back in business, though I am still a bit tripped out from the anasthtics and painkillers so my advice might be slightly more perverse and destructive than usual (though probably only slightly) for a while, please take this into account at all times, also I am not at my normal computer so it may take slightly more time than usual to conconct my nefarious plans for your rehabilitation programs (cough).
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hello, been in trouble lately? Fighting with friends? Trying to pay for those expensive, tacky Christmas presents for your significant and ingrate others? Perhaps your house has been hit by a mini tonado, or your pony's been blown up a water spout? Well, don't forget my office is always open and I am always here to laugh at your pathetic problems. Also I am now opening a hong kong style dubbed-into-english karate film transation type thread, I don't know how that's gonna work but anyway, any problems can be dealt with in the recriminagency which is there to deal with the problems that the advice column cannot.

Yours Truly.

The Management.

Ha.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;478966 wrote: Dr G...How do I get 3 excited children to bed in a hurry?? :-3

(I have no illegal substances in the house...)


Tell them that the "boogeyman" and his sidekick "boogeydonkey" are hiding somewhere downstairs and that if they hide in their beds the sleep fairy mother will keep them safe and give them a piece of chocolate in the morning, if they are too old or too suggestive for this nonsense, (its hard to tell with nowadays kids) either threaten or bribe them, whichever works best. :)
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;479023 wrote: Dr G..How do I get down my garden path without sliding? As a laydee I have to wear boots and with all this rain it has become like a mud slide! :-3


You must glue sandpaper to the soles of your shoes, if it is really muddy you may have to build a temporary bridge made out of wooden pallets and ducktape or something like that, for building instruction watch a vietnam movie or maybe a first world war film in a trench (is there one where they are not in a trench and under fire? anyone got any idea on that?) and reverse the general trench idea, its not great, but hey I'm outa practice.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

mrsK;479049 wrote: How can we make it rain in Australia:confused:


There are two general approaches to this problem,

In the first we must develop the science and technology to be able to understand, predict, and control the planets atmosphere and somehow develop an energy technology that will provide us with enough power to do this, it may require the development of matter-anti matter engines in space linked to the earth by power relay laser systems, or perhaps we could tap the tidal forces of Jupiter's gravity and use that as a power source. In terms of predicting something like the climate, the climate covers the entire surface of the earth and is about 200 miles high, every cubic centimeter of it contains trillions and trillions of atoms of oxygen, nitrogen, argon, and the minor consituents like CO2 and all the other stuff, along with all the solar radiation that is pouring in on top of us all operating and interacting via the law of quantum mechanics and the uncertainty principal, producing the climate! We need to be able to predict and control the climate to a level where we can tell what is going to happen anywhere, at any time, and what it is going to be like, then we need to work out what to do that will make something else happen, what precise method of control will result in lots of rain occuring over the austalasian continent. Its a tough call.

The other approach is praying much, much harder than at present.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
AussiePam
Posts: 9898
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2006 8:57 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by AussiePam »

I get to take a five year old to the zoo, Pinks!! I'm actually really looking forward to that. I shall pretend it's for him!!!
"Life is too short to ski with ugly men"

User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Pinky;480883 wrote: Dear Musiciany looking Dr.G,

Please tell me how I can get out of playing hours of 'shops' with a four year old child...I quite like the game, but he's a shrewd business man and keeps pressuring me into buying aeroplanes along with the toy car that I originally called in for. Saying no is not an option, as I get told I'm not playing properly!

He also wanted to charge me fifty quid for a slinky...help before I'm totally skint!:wah:


Dear concerned from Lowesoft, this is a common enough problem, children are merciless capitalists, and only the very best supercomputers seem able to outwit them in this. What you must do is arrange a long term lease on the aircraft, (say two smarties per hour for 4 hours, (tell him you want to make the entire package index linked to the Santa Credit List and that if he reneges on the deal, his credit rating with Santa will go to C minus and he will only get a mouldy orange and a picture of David Cameron for Christmas). If he does not accet this, you may have to call in hamster for industrial arbitration talks.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

AussiePam;480887 wrote: I get to take a five year old to the zoo, Pinks!! I'm actually really looking forward to that. I shall pretend it's for him!!!


Thank you AP, your intervention in this case is most helpful actually. Your consultancy fee will be forwarded to you via the Adelaide general post office.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;480915 wrote: Quick Dr G...How do I stop morning sickness that goes on all day?? :yh_sick


Don't get up until late afternoon, that would be my best suggestion at this point. :thinking:
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;480938 wrote: Um....ok thanks Dr G...

That's not really helpful!! Better open your recrimination agency! :wah:

(My 4 year old wants to cut a deal!!)


Yes, I can see why that would not work, but I don't have a lot of experience of pregancy so I am playing it safe, well at least we seem to be getting somewhere with that young Richard Branson of yours! :wah:
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Pinky;481065 wrote: Dear Dr. foxy looking G,

I seem to have got myself in a pickle...whilst having sliding down the stairs comps, I advised children that's it's way more fun when you sit in a big old pillowcase or on a tray...now Hammy's pillowcases have been down the stairs numerous times and while the kids think I'm great, I'm not too sure Hammy does anymore:wah:

What can I do to redeem myself?


Cook a good breakfast for her tomorrow once the morning sickness wears off! :wah:
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Pinky;481124 wrote: yeah, maybe plain toast so she doesn't hooey it all back up within five minutes, hehe!


Yes, and some TLC, you'll be her bestest friend again in double quick time!
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

OK, I am going to go to bed now, I've reached me tipping point and sleep has become my most urgent requirement. I will see you all tomorrow, hope you all get some sleep. Night.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Alright, I am awake now, kinda, so any early morning issues please feel free. Hamster?
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
Carl44
Posts: 10719
Joined: Fri Sep 08, 2006 9:23 am

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Carl44 »

Galbally;481313 wrote: Alright, I am awake now, kinda, so any early morning issues please feel free. Hamster?


wow dr g you normaly charge then :wah: :wah:
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

jimbo;481316 wrote: wow dr g you normaly charge then :wah: :wah:


Naturally, with this being such a high-class, top quality, not-shady, put-up-job type of joint and all, though people are allowed to feel as free as they wish. ;)
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;481366 wrote: Yeah he is a little more flexible this morning! Willing to negotiate at least! :wah:


For you dear I of course make exceptions, you have many mouths to feed, anyway that young fella of yours has already managed to get me to waive all fees till 2014, he's pretty good isn't he! :wah:

P.S. You have such beautful children hammy, you are a lucky mum, that was a lovely picture of them you posted last night. Which one is the entrepreneur? :thinking:
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
User avatar
Galbally
Posts: 9755
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:26 pm

Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Post by Galbally »

Hamster;481368 wrote: Thanks Dr G....My son was the one on the left...I hope his has learnt his amazing business skills from me??? Lol...

I may need to consult you again over this matter as he seems very shrewd and Pinky has to go home today!


They got their mom's good looks anway. I shall remember to respect his skills should we ever be negotiating high-powered business deals in the future. I am of course always here for all your problems, as they come up.
"We are never so happy, never so unhappy, as we imagine"



Le Rochefoucauld.



"A smack in the face settles all arguments, then you can move on kid."



My dad 1986.
Post Reply

Return to “General Chit Chat”