Galbally's Advice Column for FG.

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:12 am

dr can you help me too for i am a life long spurs fan woe is me :-1

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:15 am

jimbo wrote: dr can you help me too for i am a life long spurs fan woe is me :-1

Hehehe well being a Liverpool fan I'm sorry that we made you Spurs fans even more depressed on Saturday!

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:22 am

me thinks i have exposed my venerable rump ready for shafting :-1

we had our chances we did not take them you got 3 break away goals against the run of play with 2 being blatantly off side and the third i really think the guy was just trying to kick the ball high into the stand and it just flew into the goal

no kidding aside you played well and we got exactly what we deserved nothing

jimbo will not be answering any more posts that are mocking his much loved spurs for he is too busy eating sour grapes and hard cheeese

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:30 am

jimbo wrote: dr can you help me too for i am a life long spurs fan woe is me :-1

Do not despair, Spurs aren't too bad, you will be alright. Though Saturday was a bit rough for your lot. My strategy with villa was basically denial and watching the DVD of the 1982 European Cup Final against Bayern as much as possible, and not engaging people on the current team which has been up to now a case study in self destruction and crapness. Though hopefully with this Randy bloke it may get better. Well look at it like this, you might be a leeds fan, then you really would have problems.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:32 am

chrisb84uk wrote: Hehehe well being a Liverpool fan I'm sorry that we made you Spurs fans even more depressed on Saturday!

Liverpool might win the league this year I think, I don't think Chelsea are looking like a coherent team this year, of course they are top of the table and beating the tar out of lots of people, but maybe their bus will crash in a jet powered accident in Yorkshire.

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:32 am

jimbo wrote: me thinks i have exposed my venerable rump ready for shafting :-1

we had our chances we did not take them you got 3 break away goals against the run of play with 2 being blatantly off side and the third i really think the guy was just trying to kick the ball high into the stand and it just flew into the goal

no kidding aside you played well and we got exactly what we deserved nothing

jimbo will not be answering any more posts that are mocking his much loved spurs for he is too busy eating sour grapes and hard cheeese

Ah heck Jimbo, your Spurs side will be fine in a few weeks, all you need to do is put some of those goal chances away and before you know it you will be hammering teams 5-0 before long!!

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:35 am

Galbally wrote: Liverpool might win the league this year I think, I don't think Chelsea are looking like a coherent team this year, of course they are top of the table and beating the tar out of lots of people, but maybe their bus will crash in a jet powered accident in Yorkshire.

Well I hope so Galbally. We had a poor start this year, but we haven't played badly just our luck seemed to be against us, especially against the rotten Chelsea. Though you are right, they don't seem to be playing particulary well this season, but sadly they keep pulling the results out. Your Villa team is doing really well huh, my brother is a Villa fan too, and the smile on his face as of late is growing all the time!

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:45 am

chrisb84uk wrote: Well I hope so Galbally. We had a poor start this year, but we haven't played badly just our luck seemed to be against us, especially against the rotten Chelsea. Though you are right, they don't seem to be playing particulary well this season, but sadly they keep pulling the results out. Your Villa team is doing really well huh, my brother is a Villa fan too, and the smile on his face as of late is growing all the time!

I was born in Birmingham and lived near Aston before we moved to Castle Vale, and eventually back to Ireland when I was 10. My dad, god rest him, who had moved to Birmingham in 1956, and saw Villa win their last FA cup, used to bring me to Villa Park on his shoulders, so its my strongest memory of being a little lad, on me dads shoulders in Villla Park in the 1970s avoiding the riots, brilliant.

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:55 am

Galbally wrote: I was born in Birmingham and lived near Aston before we moved to Castle Vale, and eventually back to Ireland when I was 10. My dad, god rest him, who had moved to Birmingham in 1956, and saw Villa win their last FA cup, used to bring me to Villa Park on his shoulders, so its my strongest memory of being a little lad, on me dads shoulders in Villla Park in the 1970s avoiding the riots, brilliant.

Well I've been to Villa park once and that wasn't a good experience. Went there with my uncle (who is a HUGE Hammers fan,) to see them against Villa. I was pretty young, and this was my first real match visit. I can't remember why (some problem with tickets or something,) but all I remember was that we ended up sitting with the passionate Villa fan's. And on that afternoon my uncle would go nuts every time West Ham got even into the opposing box, and by half time, we were getting lots of looks and abuse hold our way. I was so scared that my uncle was going to get into trouble, that I managed to talk him into leaving at half time, and we got took away by the stewards somewhere. Not the greatest experience ever, but certainly one that is very clear in my mind!

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:00 am

Dear Dr. G

It seems you are using your medical office to have personal conversations with friends about sports.

What about us sick and twisted folks who *really* need your help?

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:06 am

cherandbuster wrote: Dear Dr. G

It seems you are using your medical office to have personal conversations with friends about sports.

What about us sick and twisted folks who *really* need your help?

Hehehe you're right I wouldn't want to take up too much of the doc's time with our football stories, especially when certain people are 'really' in more desperate need of him!

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:07 am

chrisb84uk wrote: Hehehe you're right I wouldn't want to take up too much of the doc's time with our football stories, especially when certain people are 'really' in more desperate need of him!

thank you :p

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:09 am

Hehe not at all, here why don't you start telling the doc your hassles, and I'll just go get you both a drink, seeing as how I was wasting time, my treat it's the least I can do.

:-6

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:12 am

SnoozeControl wrote: I've been in desperate need of the good doctor's services for months now!

Tell the truth Snooze

It's been YEARS now

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 7:10 am

SnoozeControl wrote: Well yeah, but I've only known the G doctor for about six months or so. :yh_whistl

Snoozie

I like you when you're semi-deranged :-4

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 9:37 am

Dear Dr Gerberwilly, when a child asks me would a woodchuck chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could cuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood, what is the child really asking ?

Uncle Kram · Post by **Uncle Kram** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 10:58 am

Galbally wrote: I was born in Birmingham and lived near Aston before we moved to Castle Vale, and eventually back to Ireland when I was 10. My dad, god rest him, who had moved to Birmingham in 1956, and saw Villa win their last FA cup, used to bring me to Villa Park on his shoulders, so its my strongest memory of being a little lad, on me dads shoulders in Villla Park in the 1970s avoiding the riots, brilliant.

I used to live in Castle Bromwich. We were practically neighbours Doc

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:03 am

cherandbuster wrote: Dear Dr. G

It seems you are using your medical office to have personal conversations with friends about sports.

What about us sick and twisted folks who *really* need your help?

Don't worry you will get all the help you need my dear.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:04 am

chrisb84uk wrote: Hehehe you're right I wouldn't want to take up too much of the doc's time with our football stories, especially when certain people are 'really' in more desperate need of him!

Quite, I shall do my best as always.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:06 am

chrisb84uk wrote: Hehe not at all, here why don't you start telling the doc your hassles, and I'll just go get you both a drink, seeing as how I was wasting time, my treat it's the least I can do.

:-6

Thank you, though I try to say as sober as possible when I'm practitioning my totally high quality, top notch, councelling. But I am Irish so of course I'm never completely sober under any shircumstances, hic.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:07 am

SnoozeControl wrote: I've been in desperate need of the good doctor's services for months now!

We shall discuss that later.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:09 am

cherandbuster wrote: Tell the truth Snooze

It's been YEARS now

Now there is no need to be abusive, lack of sexual exercise can cause severe inflammation of the ankles, its a serious problem.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:11 am

SnoozeControl wrote: Well yeah, but I've only known the G doctor for about six months or so. :yh_whistl

The G doctor, cute.

However I remind everyone that of course I remain a relatively committed health care professional so don't let these innuendos fool you into thinking I am some kind of cyber gigilo (is that the right spelling? it sounds funny to me, maybe its jigilo, no, hold on thats worse, I've lost it now).

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:14 am

cherandbuster wrote: Snoozie

I like you when you're semi-deranged :-4

Don't we all! Though of course I am helping miss control to remain as un-deranged as feasible through a tough course of dane-o-phobia treatment and various other humilitating treatments.

Post by **Betty Boop** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:15 am

Galbally wrote: Do not despair, Spurs aren't too bad, you will be alright. Though Saturday was a bit rough for your lot. My strategy with villa was basically denial and watching the DVD of the 1982 European Cup Final against Bayern as much as possible, and not engaging people on the current team which has been up to now a case study in self destruction and crapness. Though hopefully with this Randy bloke it may get better. Well look at it like this, you might be a leeds fan, then you really would have problems.

Run Galbally, run run as fast as you can!!! :wah: Hamster's gonna be after you!

Post by **Betty Boop** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:15 am

Galbally wrote: Now there is no need to be abusive, lack of sexual exercise can cause severe inflammation of the ankles, its a serious problem.

Betty's checking her ankles............................:-3

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:17 am

Nomad wrote: Dear Dr Gerberwilly, when a child asks me would a woodchuck chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could cuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood, what is the child really asking ?

Perhaps for money? I have to admit that I don't know what a wood chuck is as its an American expression, is it a axe, or a lathe of some sort, or perhaps a colloqial expression for a beaver? I would appreciate additional information Mr. N'mad.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:18 am

Uncle Kram wrote: I used to live in Castle Bromwich. We were practically neighbours Doc

Yeah, pretty much next door really, funny how things go init? Lets get a good result against Chelsea on Saturday eh?

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:19 am

Betty Boop wrote: Run Galbally, run run as fast as you can!!! :wah: Hamster's gonna be after you!

Perhaps she should be chasing the Leeds chairman instead? Don't worry I like being chased, I'm a Saggitarius after all.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:20 am

Betty Boop wrote: Betty's checking her ankles............................:-3

I'm sure that in your case that would be completey unnecessary.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:32 pm

ArnoldLayne wrote: :yh_rotfl

Can some one help me up off the floor

And what exactly is a good result against Chelsea on saturday ?

Thank you Arnold your mocking laughter is much appreciated.

I think a good result would be anything that makes Jose start making excuses about why Shevkhenko has been such a Donkey since he turned up at Stanford Bridge. Seriously though I would settle for a nil nil.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:37 pm

Hamster wrote: Dr Doctor...Perhaps you can help me...after reviewing this thread I feel in two minds...almost a split personality :-5

Should I chase after the Leeds Chairman or should I chase after you with my swollen ankles?

and to think I made you triangle sandwiches too!!! Blummin Villa fans!

Oh dear I hope we don't have another terrible quantum doppleganger incident like we did with Arnold, actually I'm not sure what became of the Anti-Arnold, I suggested a shotgun and a quarry. If your ankles are causing serious distress and sex is not readily available over the next few days I suggest a footbath in warm salty water, its not probably as enjoyable as a lovemaking session, but there are less recriminations afterwards. I'm sorry about being a rabid Villa fan, but I was born in Birmingham and there was no way I was gonna support the blues, as most Villa fans will attest its not an easy life.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:40 pm

ArnoldLayne wrote: Well just watch that donkey do a decent impression of a thoroughbred racehorse

I just hope he stays like dobbin till 4.45 on saturday, after that he can run riot.

P.S. I need an update on the Anti Arnold, I think Hampster may be developing a similar condition and I would appreciate some new information on his movements, that is, if he still coexists in our universe at this time.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:42 pm

ArnoldLayne wrote: In all seriousness I am impressed by the standard of football there so far. O'Neil is a decent manager and I like your right winger. The unpronouncable one that can run like the wind. I think he had an offer to play for Nigeria, despite having a broad midlands accent

Nigeria eh? I wonder if his granny was Irish, we need something for the national team, its depressing watching those greenshirted jokers at the minute. I think I will have to refrain from talking too much fotball in the office as it bores our American cousins, but never fear Villa's crapness will no doubt rear its head at any minute.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:54 pm

ArnoldLayne wrote: Well, I had a postcard from him not two days ago. Took ages to get here. I understand the postman took more time than was neccessary in opening the space/time fractal. I'm not even sure thats a word but thats what the post office said. Anti-Arnold has been catching some rays, apparantly, in the Andromeda region of the galaxy. He didnt want to stray too far off the beaten track. Last time he did it took him 16 parseks to get home and our mum was furious let me tell you. Wouldnt let him out for 3 light years

I hear that the Background Cosmic Radiation is lovely at the outer spiral arm of Andromeda this time of year. I hope they didn't charge you overseas on that letter as all the alt-universes co-exist with ours in the same spatial region, but it would be just like them to charge air-mail rates. Anyway thats all good news, apart from him annoying your' mum, at least he hasn't seemed to cause any recent space-time convergence events lately.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:26 pm

ArnoldLayne wrote: It cost him 4 dilitheum chrystals to send it first class. I got a phone call from him last week. I said " blimey this must be costing you a fortune " but I needn't of worried cos he's on international roaming and he gets the first 500 minutes free. Multiply that by the power of 7 as it expands through the space time continuum portal thingy - providing you can gets all four bars up - and it amounts to at least 958,000,000 free text messages. He can sell most of them on E-bay

Pricey of you ask me, well anyway at least he can make a few quid with the alt-universe text messages, though I'm not sure how many people are texting entities in the anti-universe right now, but if there's anywhere you will find them it will no doubt be on ebay trying to flog Shrodinger cats for a tenner a pop.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:49 pm

SnoozeControl wrote: Professor Galbally,

I found a wav file I made a short time ago that I'd like you to listen to... it's obvious I have some serious issues with pronunciation.

And growling.

Damn, I got quite excited and then it didn't work, oh well, we will just have to try again tomorrow as I have to go to bed now, and I bloody must work out how to put mp3s on this thing, as I have a few songs for your amusement.

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 4:31 am

dear doc my partner says unless i give her much more time ans affection and i stop annoying every one with my strange views of life on this forum she will forcibly rip off my left testicle and ram it down my throat and make me eat it before i make any hasty decisions i just wonder if you could help me out with a couple of queries

a)will little jimbo and the other one still work

b) would the taste be piratically unpleasant i know this will be a vague answer due to hygiene issues that vary from each individual and such things

as body hair etc

many thanks

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 4:41 am

SnoozeControl wrote: Sorry for butting in, Jimbo, but I thought you might be interested in some info about the annual "Testicle Festival" in Montana. Just think of the possibilities.

http://www.testyfesty.com/

oh my god

snoozie just what sort of mind looks for this sort of thing :wah: :wah: :wah:

any way enough of this bollocks i have an appointment with the doctor:wah: