Should I change my name?

StaggeringHag · Post by **StaggeringHag** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:15 am

Hello Everyone-

I am new to the forum and I am really excited to see what this is all about!

But I have my first question. I am recently married, almost a month, and I haven't changed my name. At first, I wasn't going to change my name period. Then I thought I would hyphenate it. Well I haven't made an effort to go change it at all. What are your thoughts? Your input would be appreciated!

YZGI · Post by **YZGI** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:19 am

I thought you were asking if you should change your Staggeringhag name. I was going to suggest that when you arent drinking so much that you could call yourself the Soberhag.. But then I remembered we used to have a dude here that called himself Soberanal. So I suggest, Notdrunkyethag..

Oh and welcome. Don't be shy if you need more advice.

Imladris · Post by **Imladris** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:25 am

Is it a good surname? I mean you wouldn't want to be called something like Mrs Hyde-Park or Mrs Hazard-County or something daft now would you?

I quite like Mrs Staggering-Hag, though you'd probably have to spell it to people quite a lot.

Oh what about Mrs Gawd-Blimey - I like that:D

Welcome by the way:wah:

StaggeringHag · Post by **StaggeringHag** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:31 am

I'm sorry for the confusion. I am asking if I should change my real last name, not my username. I chose Staggering like astounding, not drunk!

YZGI · Post by **YZGI** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:34 am

StaggeringHag;740007 wrote: I'm sorry for the confusion. I am asking if I should change my real last name, not my username. I chose Staggering like astounding, not drunk!

The first step to recovery is admitting the problem. I know this..:wah:

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:52 am

Wisey leaves me speechless.....and wagging my head!!:wah::wah:

Welcome to the garden, and I really am going to try not to call you hag to shorten your user name....I like SH!!:-6:-6

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:57 am

Welcome to the forum staggyhag xxx:)

If you really really wanted to change your name, I thing you would of done it by now..Do what ever feels right x

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 10:04 am

Hi Stag,

Funny you should ask this because we just recently had a thread on it.

Some people don't like to take on their husband's name because it smacks of olden days when the woman was the man's property. And some like it for just that reason. Supposedly taking on the husband's name makes it easier for people tracing family trees.

My cousin's husband took my cousin's name because he didn't like his own. That was strange to all of us but cool nonetheless.

I guess you have to examine your own reasons for wanting to change yours or not. If you're happy with your maiden name then I'd say keep it or hyphenate it. But if you think you'd be happier with your married name, then you should do that. At any rate, welcome to the garden!

StaggeringHag · Post by **StaggeringHag** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 2:15 pm

Thank you all for replies and making me feel so welcome!!!:D

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 2:39 pm

StaggeringHag;740179 wrote: Thank you all for replies and making me feel so welcome!!!:D

Thank YOU for joining!

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 2:41 pm

Hello StagH, welcome to FG.....................

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 2:58 pm

My wife wasnt going to but she ended up changing it. Her choice all the way. Its your identity so it would be understandable if you didnt. I dont think I would if I were a woman.

Not that I think about being a woman much. I mean its not like Im obsessed with the thought or anything.

I wish everyone would just off my back...GOD !

SuzyB · Post by **SuzyB** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 4:09 pm

Welcome to FG :-6

I will be changing my name next year but it really is down to the individual, you could always keep your name until you decide what to do

:)

SuzyB · Post by **SuzyB** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 4:15 pm

jimbo;740350 wrote: read my post earlier on in this thread

:D

You nutter :wah:

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 4:19 pm

SuzyB;740352 wrote: You nutter :wah:

Ill pm you what he pm'd me about what he really thinks about it. Then Ill pm you what he thinks about people pm'ing other peoples pm's in a pm.

SuzyB · Post by **SuzyB** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 4:22 pm

Nomad;740356 wrote: Ill pm you what he pm'd me about what he really thinks about it. Then Ill pm you what he thinks about people pm'ing other peoples pm's in a pm.

Thanks Nommie, your comments are much appreciated

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Fri Dec 14, 2007 5:46 pm

Nomad;740245 wrote: My wife wasnt going to but she ended up changing it. Her choice all the way. Its your identity so it would be understandable if you didnt. I dont think I would if I were a woman.

Not that I think about being a woman much. I mean its not like Im obsessed with the thought or anything.

I wish everyone would just off my back...GOD !

:wah::wah::wah:

did you flick your head and stamp your foot when you said the "GOD" bit Nommie??? Please say yes or my fantasy will be crushed ...AGAIN!:wah::wah::wah:

ethanarcilla · Post by **ethanarcilla** » Sun Dec 16, 2007 11:04 pm

StaggeringHag;739987 wrote: Hello Everyone-

I am new to the forum and I am really excited to see what this is all about!

But I have my first question. I am recently married, almost a month, and I haven't changed my name. At first, I wasn't going to change my name period. Then I thought I would hyphenate it. Well I haven't made an effort to go change it at all. What are your thoughts? Your input would be appreciated!

It really depends on whether or not you like the way your new name would sound (or read), presuming that your spouse doesn't care either way. For some couples the change in name can be a gesture of trust or faith in the bond ("two become one" or some other fun cliche'), but it's really a personal decision.

Hopefully, your new name doesn't sound like some kind of innuendo that Jay Leno would have on his headlines segment :-5

PurpleChicken · Post by **PurpleChicken** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 6:10 am

Hi StaggeringHag, welcome to FG!!

I was married about 5yrs ago and had the same dilemma. Basically neither me or my husband had a particular bent either way - he was happy for me to take it or leave it, and I didn't really have any strong reasons to keep my name...I had just move interstate, so even any thoughts I had of keeping it for work reasons seems to be absent.

All I can say is that it is a bit of a hard choice when you don't have super strong motivations in either directions. 5 yrs on, I still haven't changed my passport and have a credit card still in my maiden name. Perhaps it is me holding on, and I think I do have some regrets but it is too late to go back.

Ironically, a few years ago, we moved back here and I then had to re-introduce myself around my work industry, and ended up having to introduce myself under both names so that people remembered who I was over the phone!

but then again, the clincher for me was that if and when we have kids, I figured it was easier and better to have the same surname.

Probably doesn't help, but I certain know how you feel..... sometimes you just don't know which way to go and it is a decision that impacts you for the rest of your life!!

Cheers

PC

PurpleChicken · Post by **PurpleChicken** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:21 am

Can I change my mind? Since my last post to this thread only a couple of months ago, my husband moved out with little explanation and he has barely spoken to me since. From all appearances it is all over bar the shouting, so now I'm thinking I will need to change my name back! So in hindsight, my answer would have been no!!!

PurpleChicken · Post by **PurpleChicken** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:29 am

:wah: Took me a little while, but very funny! :wah:

PurpleChicken · Post by **PurpleChicken** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:41 am

It's getting late-ish for me on a Friday night after a long weekend at work - brain not functioning very well..... that's my excuse anyway!

Definitely not easy splitting up. Am doing much better than I had been that's for sure. I haven't around here much of late either, but always feel at home at FG so thought I would come back. I know I'll get lots of support here if need be for those bumps in the road.

Post by **Betty Boop** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 6:36 am

PurpleChicken;803115 wrote: Can I change my mind? Since my last post to this thread only a couple of months ago, my husband moved out with little explanation and he has barely spoken to me since. From all appearances it is all over bar the shouting, so now I'm thinking I will need to change my name back! So in hindsight, my answer would have been no!!!

Sorry to hear that Purple :-4

StaggeringHag · Post by **StaggeringHag** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 8:29 am

You guys are all great! I didn't think that I would get that much of a response but I really appreciate it. I have not changed my name and I don't think that I am going to. My husband seems to be okay with it and I don't want to have to get a new passport and all that. I have moved from the life I knew and loved to marry this man and my last name is my way of holding on I guess.

Purple...I am so sorry. Everything happens for a reason. Take care of yourself and do things for you.

koan · Post by **koan** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 8:45 am

Welcome to FG. :-6

It's a great place to talk out decisions that need to be made but, ultimately, it is always your choice and your opinion is the one that matters.

You might find lots of good advice here, many morons, numerous word games and a few topics that draw you in at great emotional peril. Hope you enjoy it here, it grows on you. Then suddenly you look down and realise that you are covered in fungus from not moving out of your computer chair often enough. :p

Sorry. Just realised how gross that "grows on you" expression is.

YZGI · Post by **YZGI** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 11:31 am

koan;803528 wrote: Welcome to FG. :-6

It's a great place to talk out decisions that need to be made but, ultimately, it is always your choice and your opinion is the one that matters.

You might find lots of good advice here, many morons, numerous word games and a few topics that draw you in at great emotional peril. Hope you enjoy it here, it grows on you. Then suddenly you look down and realise that you are covered in fungus from not moving out of your computer chair often enough. :p

Sorry. Just realised how gross that "grows on you" expression is.

Pfft. You're telling me!

Welcome back Shag...

Kathy Ellen · Post by **Kathy Ellen** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:30 pm

koan;803528 wrote: Welcome to FG. :-6

It's a great place to talk out decisions that need to be made but, ultimately, it is always your choice and your opinion is the one that matters.

You might find lots of good advice here, many morons, numerous word games and a few topics that draw you in at great emotional peril. Hope you enjoy it here, it grows on you. Then suddenly you look down and realise that you are covered in fungus from not moving out of your computer chair often enough. :p

Sorry. Just realised how gross that "grows on you" expression is.

Beautifully said Koan, I love the FG, and that's why I can't come on too often. I log on and realize that it's 5 hours later, and I haven't eaten yet:-6