some sad news came to me today

minks · Post by **minks** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 1:50 pm

a past very good friend of mine(will call him bob) lost his wife in her sleep last nite

I am deeply saddened. They just had a baby 3 months ago.

Bob was my rock during my black months of divorce and I in turn was his while he went through the same.

We cut our ties because his brother was a very loyal friend to my exhusband and Bob was very loyal to his family.

My children and Bobs son from his previous marriage were very good friends and Bob has run into my oldest daughter often at work. Bob and his son often asked my daughter about me and asked her to ask me to call them. I never felt it appropriate to call Bob due to the fact he had a new wife and was also because of family bonds.

Today my oldest daughter said, "call Bob and his son they need you" I suppose now is as good a time as any.

booradley · Post by **booradley** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 1:54 pm

bit of a bolt from the blue there. Was she young? obviously not old with a three month old babe

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 1:57 pm

I'm sorry Minks. What upsetting news.

Kathy Ellen · Post by **Kathy Ellen** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 1:58 pm

Sorry Mel, Life is so sad tomorrow.:-4:-4

minks · Post by **minks** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:05 pm

booradley;692748 wrote: bit of a bolt from the blue there. Was she young? obviously not old with a three month old babe

I believe she was near 40, rumor has it that perhaps it had something to do with alcoholism

littlemissgiggle · Post by **littlemissgiggle** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:07 pm

:-1

my heart goes out to you and your friend :-4

neffy · Post by **neffy** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:08 pm

so sorry mel for your lost my thoughts to the famliy

-1

Lisa · Post by **Lisa** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:20 pm

Thats so sad for the baby to loose it's mommy.:-1

You would be a great friend if you could help him get throught this.:-6

I say go fot it. He may need someone to talk to.

Lisa

.

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:25 pm

Sad news mel.

Hugs to you.

minks · Post by **minks** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:28 pm

FuzzyNavel;692771 wrote: Thats so sad for the baby to loose it's mommy.:-1

You would be a great friend if you could help him get throught this.:-6

I say go fot it. He may need someone to talk to.

Lisa

.

thanks everybody yes it's very sad, and the stupid ex-husband I asked if I should phone and offer my support and he said flat out "NO"

So I now have my oldest trying to get the phone numbers for me.

Yes so sad for my friend and family they just can't ever buy a break.

SuzyB · Post by **SuzyB** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:28 pm

I am so sorry Minks, always so sad to lose someone especially someone young with everything to look forward to. I know that you will be a great support to your friend and his child :-4

minks · Post by **minks** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:41 pm

SuzyB;692783 wrote: I am so sorry Minks, always so sad to lose someone especially someone young with everything to look forward to. I know that you will be a great support to your friend and his child :-4

Thanks SuzyB yes and this couple were only together for about 3 years

sad for everybody.

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:42 pm

I am sorry to hear such sad news, be there for them Minks, and hugs to you all.

booradley · Post by **booradley** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 3:03 pm

minks;692781 wrote: thanks everybody yes it's very sad, and the stupid ex-husband I asked if I should phone and offer my support and he said flat out "NO"

So I now have my oldest trying to get the phone numbers for me.

Yes so sad for my friend and family they just can't ever buy a break.

well he would say that. Send a card with a personal note with your contact numbers for now. You may not hear from him for a while, but he'll appreciate the gesture and when the clouds have cleared a bit, I'm sure he'll get in touch. you can never have too many friends, family loyalties or not.

minks · Post by **minks** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 3:09 pm

booradley;692821 wrote: well he would say that. Send a card with a personal note with your contact numbers for now. You may not hear from him for a while, but he'll appreciate the gesture and when the clouds have cleared a bit, I'm sure he'll get in toch. you can never have too many friends, family loyalties or not.

thanks Booradley that's a good thought. I have my daughter trying to find some way of contacting him as he is not listed in the phone book anymore and I have since lost his numbers. My daughter see's his son on MSN often. I am sure he will appreciate a friend when he is past the immediate shock and obligations.

thanks everybody

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 3:18 pm

I like Boo's suggestion. But I think it would also be okay if you called him soon. Whatever you think is best.

In some ways it seems like a blessing to leave in one's sleep. If it has to happen at all that is. Then in other ways, maybe not such a blessing.

I'm truly sorry, M.

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 5:47 pm

Very very sad. These tradgedys offer us the opportunity to be there for someone dear, who needs us. I know you will be there for your friend, and you will be good support for him.

Patsy Warnick · Post by **Patsy Warnick** » Mon Sep 10, 2007 6:48 pm

Minks

I'm sure your friend Bob would really appreciate you reaching out to support him.

Of course your EX would say NO - idiot..

Let BOB decide whether he wants to talk or not.

Patsy

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Tue Sep 11, 2007 3:23 am

Oh what sad news, my heart goes out to the family and to you Mel. I'm sure that your support will be of great value to them through these tough times ahead, but knowing that someone is there with them guiding them through it, I'm sure will be a huge help!

Mia · Post by **Mia** » Tue Sep 11, 2007 4:03 am

So very sad to read this.Yes your friend needs all the support he can get,especialy with such a young baby to care for. Life can be so unfair at times.

Rapunzel · Post by **Rapunzel** » Tue Sep 11, 2007 4:06 am

Patsy Warnick;692888 wrote: Minks

I'm sure your friend Bob would really appreciate you reaching out to support him.

Of course your EX would say NO - idiot..

Let BOB decide whether he wants to talk or not.

Patsy

Well said Patsy.

Mel, I'm so sorry to hear your sad news.

You are a strong person and I'm sure your support will be of comfort to your friend. Love and hugs to you and your family and your friend and his family, you're all in my thoughts and prayers.

Love, Mel 2.

minks · Post by **minks** » Tue Sep 11, 2007 8:01 am

thank you all of you, OMG Chirs and Rap special thanks seeing you guys here. I now sit and wait for my daughter to hunt down some phone numbers for me as I have none at the moment. She is good for that, she will find a way.

minks · Post by **minks** » Wed Sep 12, 2007 7:16 am

The autopsy revealed nothing in determining the cause of death. Apparently tissue samples have been taken and testing and results will take up to 2 months. How awful no knowing what caused your spouses death

My daughters have insisted I go with them to the funeral on Friday. I shall, it will be very awkward for me but for the sake of an old friend I will be there for him.

SuzyB · Post by **SuzyB** » Wed Sep 12, 2007 7:24 am

minks;693517 wrote: The autopsy revealed nothing in determining the cause of death. Apparently tissue samples have been taken and testing and results will take up to 2 months. How awful no knowing what caused your spouses death

My daughters have insisted I go with them to the funeral on Friday. I shall, it will be very awkward for me but for the sake of an old friend I will be there for him.

That is what makes you such a dear friend :-4

mikeinie · Post by **mikeinie** » Wed Sep 12, 2007 9:17 am

Hey Minks, Very sorry to hear the news. There are time when what people think and matter just doesn´t come ito it, give the guy a call, he needs his old friend.

double helix · Post by **double helix** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 11:31 pm

minks;692756 wrote: I believe she was near 40, rumor has it that perhaps it had something to do with alcoholism

OMG, what are you saying? A three month old and the mother is an alcoholic? Bad enough to die from the drinking? OUCH!

Sorry, I just was so shocked by the very idea I bluted out what I was thinking.:-3

Indian Princess · Post by **Indian Princess** » Sun Sep 16, 2007 10:55 am

I am sorry for your loss:-1

minks · Post by **minks** » Sun Sep 16, 2007 11:08 am

thanks all of you, the service was very nice I did manage a few words with my friend. We agreed to catch up within the next couple weeks. Sure is tough to see your friend in such deep grief. His family all recognized the girls and I and every one hugged me and thanked me and them for coming.

The friends of the womans family set up an education fund for her babies in leiu of flowers I thought this was nice.

My friend wanted me to go see his baby that day but I said no another time, and bowed out with a promise to keep in touch.

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Sun Sep 16, 2007 11:16 am

I'm glad you went to the service and was there, friends are a comfort to the poor family during these times. Hugs to you all.