A young newlywed couple wanted to join a Church. The Paster told the young couple, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from sex for one whole month."
The couple agreed, and after two-and-a-half weeks returned to the Church. When the Pastor ushered them into his office, the wife was crying, and the husband obviously was very depressed.
"You are back so soon...Is there a problem?" the Pastor inquired.
"We are terribly ashamed to admit that we did not manage to abstain from sex for the required month.." the young man replied sadly.
The Pastor asked him what happened?
"Well..the first week was difficult...However, we managed to abastain through sheer willpower. The second week was terrible, but with the use of willpower, prayer, reading from the Bible...even taking cold showers, we managed to abstain. However....the third week was unbearable. We simply could not stand it any longer. One afternoon, my wife reached for a can a paint and dropped it on the floor. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and had my way with her right then and there," admitted the man, shamefacedly.
"You understand this means you will not be welcome in our Church," stated the Pastor.
"We know," said the young man.
"We are not welcome back in Home Depot either."
Newlywed couple
Newlywed couple
CUTE...LOL.. :wah: :wah:
ALOHA!!
MOTTO TO LIVE BY:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, champagne in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming.
WOO HOO!!, what a ride!!!"
MOTTO TO LIVE BY:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, champagne in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming.
WOO HOO!!, what a ride!!!"
Newlywed couple
HA! :wah:
That's the best one I have heard in a LONG time! That is great!!!!
That's the best one I have heard in a LONG time! That is great!!!!
DANGER!I drive like you do.
Newlywed couple
Gee..... I am needing to do some home improvements this weekend.......Me thinks I just might check out the spray paint section too....never know. LOL
"If America Was A Tree, The Left Would Root For The Termites...Greg Gutfeld."
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nvalleyvee
- Posts: 5191
- Joined: Thu Apr 21, 2005 8:57 am
Newlywed couple
LMFAO - there are long stretches of my life I would have gladly been kicked out of Home Depot - and I have a credit card there!
The growth of knowledge depends entirely on disagreement..........Karl R. Popper
Newlywed couple
Reminds me of the one where the vicar told the couple to abstain. One day the wife was bending over in the kitchen when her husband, overcome with desire, suddenly ran into the room and took her forcibly from behind. "You again, vicar?" she asked without turning round............