So, whats Wrong with YOU!

Indian Princess · Post by **Indian Princess** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 10:06 am

Did you ever notice if you are a divorced person and you are hanging out, the other person views you as damaged goods, so, what wrong with you, you seem nice enough, but someone would have snatched you up if you were this real.

What is that, self preservation?

I have even had these thoughts myself about others.

minks · Post by **minks** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 10:09 am

Indian Princess;601958 wrote: Did you ever notice if you are a divorced person and you are hanging out, the other person views you as damaged goods, so, what wrong with you, you seem nice enough, but someone would have snatched you up if you were this real.

What is that, self preservation?

I have even had these thoughts myself about others.

Oh girlie I get that all the time. I get this comment all the time "so why are you single" ahahahaha

I wanna say cause i have this giant wart on my butt. That is my curse.

Ahahahahaha

I then usually have to tell people I am single cause I married a cheater, then later dated a liar. Hmmm nothing wrong with me other than my lousy choices.

pinkchick · Post by **pinkchick** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 10:14 am

The favourite phrase of the moment on this side of the pond is

"So why are you not married with children?"

Drives me mad:-5

My answer right now is - I choose not to be thanks:-6

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 10:17 am

Actually no, I've never noticed this, and not one divorced person that I know has said they feel that way. I'm not divorced, but I realize that things happen, people change, life happens, so why in the world would they be considered damaged?? My boyfriend is divorced and it's never bothered me or made me see him in a negative way. Personally, I think it'd be an insecurity with the person themselves if they felt that way or thought others saw them that way. Besides, if someone did see you as damaged, that's just pure ignorance anyway, so why care what they think?? There's obviously something wrong with them.

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 10:29 am

I was concerned about people thinking that about me when I was going through the divorce, like I'm a failure...actually stayed with the man because of those fears. Thankfully in time, I came to the realization..."Ain't nothing wrong with me"!!

Everyone goes through trials in their lives, the here and now is what we need to be content with and love life to it's fullest...don't look back...it's behind us for a reason...where it needs to stay!

:)

Indian Princess · Post by **Indian Princess** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 10:52 am

I wish you were my neighbor Wonder Wendy:wah:

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 11:07 am

I got over that along time ago...my ex was never with me..i learned to go visit and have couple friends..i go to get togethers and stuff on my own...i reckon i have done it so long that it is just normal for me....I stopped answering dumb questions back then...like where is your other half and stuff like that..it was nobodies business and most of the time it was just a way to small talk....i would ignore it and ask them a question and change the convo...your attitude about being single will come across in crowds..dont apologise for it ip..it is a chance for you to learn and grow...how you percieve yourself is how others will percieve you.....

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 11:57 am

I have to tell this story...years ago i was going to the ymca to work out at nine in the morning...a man i knew from church was always there...he would walk up to me and the first thing out of his mouth was "where is your other half" i would give a pat answer.i dunno....after several weeks of this i finally asked him to stop asking me that...if he wanted to talk to me ask about me...he wouldn't quit..i got defensive and changed my time to two pm..sure enough a few days later ...jerry shows up and keeps up with the same stupid quesiton...i finally blew up and got mad..i asked him why he insisted on reminding me i am a loser...his answer;

Rhonda, you fascinate me..when you walk in a room you light it up..everybody notices you...everybody is drawn to you..have you ever noticed how many men jump to change the weights for you? all i can think about is what an idiot you are married to . goes to show how you never really know what the other person is meaning...after that i never quite looked at my situation the same way again....

Marie5656 · Post by **Marie5656** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 12:18 pm

How about this one. Before Rick and I maried, I had never been married...and was in my late 40's. So, I was looked at as there being something wrong with me.

Had some people ask if I was gay (I personally would have had no problem saying yes if I was) . I asked why they thought that..and the answer was usually, "Well, you have never been married". And that uestion was from people who had SEEN me dating men!! Go figure.

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 12:35 pm

Indian Princess;601998 wrote: I wish you were my neighbor Wonder Wendy:wah:

awww, there are houses for sale in my neighborhood!!:-6 :-4

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 12:48 pm

pinkchick;601967 wrote: The favourite phrase of the moment on this side of the pond is

"So why are you not married with children?"

That is so rude! I get that a lot. From relatives even. It's like I don't totally count yet until I nail down some guy and crank out some kids which is never gonna happen. Somebody from FG even asked me why I had no kids. I thought it was way inappropriate of her and it pissed me off for a few weeks.

pinkchick · Post by **pinkchick** » Sat Apr 28, 2007 4:36 pm

RedGlitter;602109 wrote: That is so rude! I get that a lot. From relatives even. It's like I don't totally count yet until I nail down some guy and crank out some kids which is never gonna happen. Somebody from FG even asked me why I had no kids. I thought it was way inappropriate of her and it pissed me off for a few weeks.

I know!!! It's almost like they think you're not "complete if you're not married and popping babies out every five minutes!:-5

Don't get me wrong - I would like to have someone to share my life with but if it doesn't happen then so be it! I'm still gonna enjoy my life:)

Indian Princess · Post by **Indian Princess** » Sun Apr 29, 2007 6:29 am

thats beautiful, a new way to look at it.:-6

BUT WE ALREADY KNEW YOU SHINED RHONDA:-6 :-6 :-6

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Mon Apr 30, 2007 11:09 am

pinkchick;602315 wrote: I know!!! It's almost like they think you're not "complete if you're not married and popping babies out every five minutes!:-5

Don't get me wrong - I would like to have someone to share my life with but if it doesn't happen then so be it! I'm still gonna enjoy my life:)

Not to mention that most guys can't stand those kind of women, the ones that only want to get a man to stop the old hen's from cackling at 'em.

We are already fully complete and intact, regardless of our marriage status.

pinkchick · Post by **pinkchick** » Mon Apr 30, 2007 11:30 am

laneybug;603427 wrote: Not to mention that most guys can't stand those kind of women, the ones that only want to get a man to stop the old hen's from cackling at 'em.

We are already fully complete and intact, regardless of our marriage status.

Well said chick:)

I couldn't agree more:p

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Mon Apr 30, 2007 2:18 pm

RedGlitter;602109 wrote: ThI get that a lot. From relatives even. It's like I don't totally count yet until I nail down some guy and crank out some kids which is never gonna happen.

Are you sure? Even the wide-mouthed frog (Mrs. B. Liar) "cranked one out" at what, 45?

That is a rhetorical question, BTW.

I edit this again to say that I've edited it.

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Mon Apr 30, 2007 2:22 pm

Bill Sikes;603614 wrote: Are you sure? Even the wide-mouthed frog (Mrs. B. Liar) "cranked one out" at what, 45?

That is a rhetorical question, BTW.

I edit this again to say that I've edited it.

But Bill...what about us women who don't want children? We exist! We get fed blather about how we're not *real* women unless we've done this. We're sometimes told we're selfish! We're told all men want kids so we're not marriageable. Like because we're women, this is our purpose in life. I find this stuff so aggravating.

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Mon Apr 30, 2007 2:25 pm

Indian Princess;601958 wrote: Did you ever notice if you are a divorced person and you are hanging out, the other person views you as damaged goods, so, what wrong with you, you seem nice enough, but someone would have snatched you up if you were this real.

I'm not sure why I should be "hanging out" (?), but:- you need inner strength to believe in yourself and maintain your being, as well as to not go around slagging off your ex-spouse, however much they deserve it, even if they are a lying, stinking, conniving theiving two to the power n where n is above 5 cheating long-time POS who's done it to several people before and is the most artful person in the world at sucking up to any new acquaintance, the bastard!

;)