About 5 years ago I was at my perfect weight for health reasons - doing Iyengar yoga three times a week, the gym etc. But since then I've been promoted and it's hell ; I sit all day, for 10 hours min, and drive between meetings. I rarely get to even have a proper lunch break when I could go walking somewhere, because crappy admin meetings are held at lunchtime. I'm often at court where you have access to not particularly healthy sandwiches in between hearings.
I do want to lose weight ; I'm not far off 40 and my back is hurting a bit these days - not because of arthritis but because I have a little tummy and my poor tummy muscles aren't holding it in. I can see how being overweight as I get older is going to put me at risk from diabetes etc.
But I have a problem. I totally comfort eat. If I've had a really stressful day or week (most of them are), I don't drink to excess, take drugs or sleep around (although that is of course my life goal
) - I reach for the chocolate.I've tried lots of ways to replace food with excercise or other things....but, nah, hasn't worked.
I tried hypnotherapy not long ago and it was great for about a month - and then I had PMS, a string of things going wrong at work and I started eating badly again.Hell, I've even tried spells to help (I'm a Wiccan).
This isn't about fitting into a masochistic culture that sees women as objects - preferably blonde, skinny objects (I'm dark, nearly 6ft tall and I'm never going to be slender) - but it is about me recognising that I would be healthier if I were slimmer.
I'm not stupid or short-sighted, but I can't seem to break this habit.
How do I find the balance between eating what I want in moderation and eating too much as comfort? And how do I make excercise seem attractive? Because I have to tell you, after 10 or 12 hours in the office, all I've got energy for when I get home is to eat something and then collapse. Maybe with a bit of posting here too.
The thought of having a gastric band really did cross my mind the other day.....:-2