Re: Do All Men Cheat If So, Why? .....my opinion answers for ya to give feedback.

zinkyusa · Post by **zinkyusa** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:13 pm

Pinky wrote: It depends on the realtionship. If it was based on personality connection and there were no issues, then yeah. If not, It's kinder to keep it from them. I'm an honest person, so I wouldn't.

I don't believe in hurting somone simply to be honest, that's brutal honesty..

zinkyusa · Post by **zinkyusa** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:14 pm

Pinky wrote: Cyber sex? Why not? It's no worse than going somewhere else in your head.

I have an online lover now, and it's great fun!

I told you not to tell:-5

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:15 pm

I TOLD HER NOT TO TELL!

zinkyusa · Post by **zinkyusa** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:16 pm

Lulu2 wrote: I TOLD HER NOT TO TELL!

you too Lulu!:eek:

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:17 pm

She is SO fickle! (part of her charm, I guess.)

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:25 pm

i have a friend whose husband was involved in an auto accident more than five years ago. he is paralyzed from mid chest down. no sex. she freguently goes out on the weekend and gets her needs met; althought i know for a fact she has no intention of leaving her husband. she loves him very much. they have four kids between them. she is just taking care of herself............he doesn't ask her where she goes and she does not tell what she does. it works for them...............

seekerw · Post by **seekerw** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:27 pm

Why do some men cheat? Easy. Because they choose to do so. That's the bottom line. It's a free choice. Not much more to it than that.

zinkyusa · Post by **zinkyusa** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:28 pm

seekerw wrote: Why do some men cheat? Easy. Because they choose to do so. That's the bottom line. It's a free choice. Not much more to it than that.

same thing for women?

seekerw · Post by **seekerw** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:31 pm

zinkyusa wrote: same thing for women?

I'm not a woman, and neither are you, I see. Why bring women into this?

Do you think that since some women cheat, it's okay for some men to cheat?

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:33 pm

Seeker, I'm the one who asked if it makes a difference who's doing it? It was a theoretical question....nothing more.

KARENSVINEYARD · Post by **KARENSVINEYARD** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:36 pm

Pinky wrote: Cyber sex? Why not? It's no worse than going somewhere else in your head.

I have an online lover now, and it's great fun!

i couldn't Disagree with you more. say my husband goes to a strip club, i better be comin' along to, and there better be a male show in there somewhere cause i'm gonna drop the dollars too. both or not at all cause it just dont work any other way. i dont want some fool talkin' to me thats married and just wants to use me. i'm worth more than that.

zinkyusa · Post by **zinkyusa** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:37 pm

seekerw wrote: I'm not a woman, and neither are you, I see. Why bring women into this?

Do you think that since some women cheat, it's okay for some men to cheat?

it's not my business what other people do

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:39 pm

Another friend is having cyber sex with a woman across the nation. He works at home and this happens during the day, when his wife is at her job. Is THIS cheating?

seekerw · Post by **seekerw** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:40 pm

Lulu2 wrote: Seeker, I'm the one who asked if it makes a difference who's doing it? It was a theoretical question....nothing more.

Oh. All I saw was zinky's post. Didn't know he was working off your post.

KARENSVINEYARD · Post by **KARENSVINEYARD** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:41 pm

hey whats up with CC ? accountable had somethin' written under his name to of remembering Ches.Cat? she was just on here the other day right? Seen that and it kinda freaked me out cause i was in a horrible car accident last night for the first time in my life, and could've lost both me and my little girl so i've been thinkin' about it all day and then I seen the CC notes here and there and got little worried, what happened??????

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:47 pm

(Don't know about you all....but having a lot of fun here tonight makes me feel better...and I think she'd be jumping right in here, too.)

zinkyusa · Post by **zinkyusa** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:48 pm

Lulu2 wrote: (Don't know about you all....but having a lot of fun here tonight makes that all better...and I think she'd be jumping right in here, too.)

Yes she would be having a ball tonight:wah:

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:49 pm

OK...cybersex....cheating or not?

KARENSVINEYARD · Post by **KARENSVINEYARD** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:52 pm

Pinky wrote: Anyway, it depends on whether you see sex as person or not. Ok, it is personal, but do you always have to get emotionally involved? Not always. In that case, it's not using, it's fulfillment.

(Sorry, can't resist playing devil's advocate)

i guess to me it matters more how the others behind the scenes feel that dont know what's going on. its all personal descretion and if the other person does have another person or not. i see what your sayin' though.

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 5:59 pm

My reasons for bringing up these questions are that, as I see more of life, I realize that some situations aren't as easy to "call" as others. I know some would condemn my friend, but he IS staying in the marriage (for one thing, she depends on him for health insurance) and he doesn't flaunt it. My friend having the cyber affair is married to a woman who thinks sex is "disgusting," and this seems to relieve tension for him. He's only 38!

It just seems that blanket statements about what's wrong and what's right get blurry when you hold them up to real life.

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:11 pm

Lulu, you never know what goes on between the husband and wife. the wife of you friend may not really think sex is disgusting. she and thehusband might have problems that have ended up affecting their marriage. i myself was married to a raging alchoholic. we ended up in a six year dead marriage. no sex. none. not for me anyway....................for SIX whole years............and counting...........i have not broken it yet,....................................................the lack of sex that is, i have gotten rid of the broken boy...................................i fi could do it over again i might of did it differently. after seperating i found out just how not celebate he was ...............

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:17 pm

i might change my nick to tired happy bunny before it is over with....................

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:43 pm

Guppy, I'm sorry you had such a bad experience. Certainly, people do lie about their marriages, etc. BUT...these people are my friends and I really must believe them as they've no reason in the world to lie to me.

I expect this is a sore subject with you....sorry.

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:48 pm

not in the least honey. think more of on the lines of i am on" mark get set, go".............................:p

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:50 pm

Then I'll "high five" you and say "LOOK OUT, WORLD!"

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:52 pm

i want to go around and pass up start alot.............................

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Wed Sep 20, 2006 1:42 am

Lulu2 wrote: OK--what's "cheating?" Is it flirtation/online sex with a stranger? Is it telephone sex? Is it a "one-night stand" on an overnight business trip?

Yes to all but the flirtation.

Remember Jimmy Carter confessing that he had, in fact, "lusted in his heart" for other women? Is THAT cheating?

No.

I know a man married to a woman who has had multiple schlerosis for the past 12 years and cannot be touched. The drugs she takes and the discomfort of her disease makes sex abhorrent to her. Suppose this man sought sex outside of the marriage? Is that "cheating?"

Yes. He married her for better or for worse. He has a hand, doesn't he?

Is it different if a woman does these things?

No.

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Wed Sep 20, 2006 1:47 am

guppy wrote: Lulu, you never know what goes on between the husband and wife. the wife of you friend may not really think sex is disgusting. she and thehusband might have problems that have ended up affecting their marriage. i myself was married to a raging alchoholic. we ended up in a six year dead marriage. no sex. none. not for me anyway....................for SIX whole years............and counting...........i have not broken it yet,....................................................the lack of sex that is, i have gotten rid of the broken boy...................................i fi could do it over again i might of did it differently. after seperating i found out just how not celebate he was ...............

Hey Gupster

Thank you for sharing your personal story with us.

After seeing your profile picture (everyone should take a look -- she's GORGEOUS!), I don't think you'll be alone for long.

Truly :-6

Accountable · Post by **Accountable** » Wed Sep 20, 2006 3:50 am

Lulu2 wrote: My reasons for bringing up these questions are that, as I see more of life, I realize that some situations aren't as easy to "call" as others. I know some would condemn my friend, but he IS staying in the marriage (for one thing, she depends on him for health insurance) and he doesn't flaunt it. My friend having the cyber affair is married to a woman who thinks sex is "disgusting," and this seems to relieve tension for him. He's only 38!

It just seems that blanket statements about what's wrong and what's right get blurry when you hold them up to real life.See, I'm the opposite (go figure, eh?). We try to complicate things and blur the lines to justify bad behavior.

What is "cheating"?

Isn't it more important to give your heart and mind to your beloved than only physical action? When one engages in cyber-sex, then has sex with one's spouse, who is he/she making love to during the sex? The spouse is getting the physical sex, but what about the love, the devotion?

Have cyber-sex with each other to spice things up.

Watch porn together to maybe discover new maneuvers.

Go to a singles bar in separate cars, and have a one-night stand with your spouse.

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Wed Sep 20, 2006 4:42 am

Accountable wrote: See, I'm the opposite (go figure, eh?). We try to complicate things and blur the lines to justify bad behavior.

What is "cheating"?

Isn't it more important to give your heart and mind to your beloved than only physical action? When one engages in cyber-sex, then has sex with one's spouse, who is he/she making love to during the sex? The spouse is getting the physical sex, but what about the love, the devotion?

Have cyber-sex with each other to spice things up.

Watch porn together to maybe discover new maneuvers.

Go to a singles bar in separate cars, and have a one-night stand with your spouse.

:-4

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Wed Sep 20, 2006 6:44 am

RedGlitter wrote: :-4

Yup, Red

That's our Acc :-6