before you get married

General humor & jokes. Share funny photos and jokes. Must be "R" rated or below.
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buttercup
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before you get married

Post by buttercup »

before you get married you should have a pre nup list of requirements, please add to the list



we will attend at least one music festival each year
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minks
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before you get married

Post by minks »

buttercup wrote: before you get married you should have a pre nup list of requirements, please add to the list



we will attend at least one music festival each year


you should present me with a criminal background check.... ooo no wrong??:-3

Ok you will allow me time with the TV Remote
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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buttercup
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before you get married

Post by buttercup »

quote minx - Ok you will allow me time with the TV Remote

like that would ever happen :yh_rotfl
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minks
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before you get married

Post by minks »

buttercup wrote: quote minx - Ok you will allow me time with the TV Remote

like that would ever happen :yh_rotfl


then the marriage would be OFF! :wah:
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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buttercup
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before you get married

Post by buttercup »

we will not babysit for our grandchildren every weekend
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BabyRider
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before you get married

Post by BabyRider »

We will not allow our parents to have a say in OUR marriage.
[FONT=Arial Black]I hope you cherish this sweet way of life, and I hope you know that it comes with a price.
~Darrel Worley~
[/FONT]










Bullet's trial was a farce. Can I get an AMEN?????


We won't be punished for our sins, but BY them.




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buttercup
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before you get married

Post by buttercup »

BabyRider wrote: We will not allow our parents to have a say in OUR marriage.


ooooooh thats a good one ;)
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Bryn Mawr
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before you get married

Post by Bryn Mawr »

buttercup wrote: ooooooh thats a good one ;)


Sadly, it sounded like the voice of experience
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chonsigirl
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before you get married

Post by chonsigirl »

Peanut butter must be stocked in the cupboard at all times.:)
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Sheryl
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Post by Sheryl »

Whatever, I don't care, and other such phrases will not be allowed when asked what you want for dinner. :rolleyes:
"Girls are crazy! I'm not ever getting married, I can make my own sandwiches!"

my son
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buttercup
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before you get married

Post by buttercup »

Bryn Mawr wrote: Sadly, it sounded like the voice of experience


yup, but that was then & this is now :-6
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buttercup
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before you get married

Post by buttercup »

chonsi & cheryl consider them added :wah:
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BabyRider
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Post by BabyRider »

Bryn Mawr wrote: Sadly, it sounded like the voice of experience
It was. Not a marriage but a long term relationship that took me WAY too long to figure out that he was a total Momma's boy.



Definitely not the case with my first, and only marriage!
[FONT=Arial Black]I hope you cherish this sweet way of life, and I hope you know that it comes with a price.
~Darrel Worley~
[/FONT]










Bullet's trial was a farce. Can I get an AMEN?????


We won't be punished for our sins, but BY them.




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Peg
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before you get married

Post by Peg »

Thou shalt roll over instead of snoring loudly in my ear. Now that IS the voice of experience.:wah:
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BabyRider
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before you get married

Post by BabyRider »

Peg wrote: Thou shalt roll over instead of snoring loudly in my ear. Now that IS the voice of experience.:wah:
There's a good one.



Here's another:



NO, you ripping a fart after sex is NOT the same as me having a cigarette.
[FONT=Arial Black]I hope you cherish this sweet way of life, and I hope you know that it comes with a price.
~Darrel Worley~
[/FONT]










Bullet's trial was a farce. Can I get an AMEN?????


We won't be punished for our sins, but BY them.




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Peg
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before you get married

Post by Peg »

LMAO BR! Here's a must. Thou shalt not pull the covers over my head when you fart. That is NOT considered foreplay guys!
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BabyRider
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Post by BabyRider »

Peg wrote: LMAO BR! Here's a must. Thou shalt not pull the covers over my head when you fart. That is NOT considered foreplay guys!
Definitely a must!!



How about:

Running out of the room to rip a fart will still kill the mood just as quickly as if you were right here.
[FONT=Arial Black]I hope you cherish this sweet way of life, and I hope you know that it comes with a price.
~Darrel Worley~
[/FONT]










Bullet's trial was a farce. Can I get an AMEN?????


We won't be punished for our sins, but BY them.




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Peg
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before you get married

Post by Peg »

Farting after sex is not considered afterglow.:wah:
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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

Pick and choose your battles.

It's really not important who wins, but rather that you both get to the same side:-6
Live Life with

PASSION
!:guitarist





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Peg
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Post by Peg »

cherandbuster wrote: Pick and choose your battles.

It's really not important who wins, but rather that you both get to the same side:-6
:yh_clap :yh_clap :yh_worshp
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minks
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Post by minks »

If you have asked me where something is, you darn well better have put in an effort to look for it yourself first!!
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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Marie5656
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Post by Marie5656 »

You will not ask whats for dinner, and then complain when what I made is not what you wanted...especially since it has already been established that "whatever," and "dosen't matter" are not staples in this kitchen.
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Marie5656
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Post by Marie5656 »

You will not as "How do I look in this outfit, hairstyle or whatever" unless you are willing to accept an honest response.
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minks
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Post by minks »

Use the words "I Love You" often
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

Marie5656 wrote: You will not as "How do I look in this outfit, hairstyle or whatever" unless you are willing to accept an honest response.


Well . . .

I prefer: You will, under no circumstances, come hell or high water, tell me I look fat in these pants.

Honestly is *not* always the best policy:)
Live Life with

PASSION
!:guitarist





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YZGI
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Post by YZGI »

You girls don't want to be married to men. You want to be married to men who act like women.
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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

YZGI wrote: You girls don't want to be married to men. You want to be married to men who act like women.


Actually

we really want to be married to a girlfriend with a large penis:thinking:
Live Life with

PASSION
!:guitarist





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minks
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Post by minks »

YZGI wrote: You girls don't want to be married to men. You want to be married to men who act like women.


ah well we haven't seen too many Man responses so we are doing what we can hehehehe
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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chonsigirl
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Post by chonsigirl »

Yeah, it is mostly girls posting, yeah for YZGI!
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YZGI
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Post by YZGI »

Kinda reminds me of a conversation my wife and I had years ago after I came home from a strip joint. "Why do you go to those places?" "Well i like to look at naked women, imagine if I did'nt like to look at naked women, we would never have gotten married."
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minks
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before you get married

Post by minks »

YZGI wrote: Kinda reminds me of a conversation my wife and I had years ago after I came home from a strip joint. "Why do you go to those places?" "Well i like to look at naked women, imagine if I did'nt like to look at naked women, we would never have gotten married."


Interestingly funny.:wah:
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

• Mae West
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YZGI
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Post by YZGI »

[QUOTE=cherandbuster]Actually

we really want to be married to a girlfriend with a large penis:thinking:[/QHow bout a medium penis and does'nt fart around the wifey?
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Peg
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Post by Peg »

YZGI wrote: Kinda reminds me of a conversation my wife and I had years ago after I came home from a strip joint. "Why do you go to those places?" "Well i like to look at naked women, imagine if I did'nt like to look at naked women, we would never have gotten married."
Did your wife go see male strippers? She enjoys seeing naked men, doesn't she? Would this have been a problem? Sorry, just curious.
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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

minks wrote: Interestingly funny.:wah:


Minxie

I like the way you put that:-6
Live Life with

PASSION
!:guitarist





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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

YZGI wrote: How bout a medium penis and does'nt fart around the wifey?


SOLD!!!!! to the highest bidder:)
Live Life with

PASSION
!:guitarist





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