Rapunzel's Ribticklers!

General humor & jokes. Share funny photos and jokes. Must be "R" rated or below.
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Rapunzel
Posts: 6509
Joined: Thu May 12, 2005 5:47 pm

Rapunzel's Ribticklers!

Post by Rapunzel »

Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grand motherly, elderly woman to the stand.

He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've know you since you

were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me.

You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them

behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the

brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit

paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The Lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you b*****ds asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt."
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Sheryl
Posts: 8498
Joined: Mon Feb 28, 2005 3:08 am

Rapunzel's Ribticklers!

Post by Sheryl »

:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl

now that was a funny one!!
"Girls are crazy! I'm not ever getting married, I can make my own sandwiches!"

my son
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OpenMind
Posts: 8645
Joined: Sun Sep 11, 2005 3:54 am

Rapunzel's Ribticklers!

Post by OpenMind »

Excellent, a jumbo sandwich.:D :wah:
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