This thread may cause hysterical laughter

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 10:58 am

To some here.

After lengthy debates regarding the forthcoming general election of May 2015, naturally, all paties are working in earnest to promote themselves for election.

It has been deemed and made official that our city has only one parliamentary candidate for the party in a ward of the city rather than stand various candidates.

The pledge behind this is that the party throw their full weight into a giant campaign to promote that one candidate.

That unfortunately for me, has been elcted to be my wife.

I don't wish this to go down the route of my wife or the party she represents but more the question of, if this were you, how would you go about your campaign?

Many idea's have already been discussed naturally but i'm interested in how you the voter choose the candidate that attracts your cross on the ballot sheet.

What qualities do you look for or do you go by party alone?

Even, do you have any idea's other than party line? I welcome all genuine suggestions.

AnneBoleyn · Post by **AnneBoleyn** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 11:14 am

The pledge behind this is that the party throw their full weight into a giant campaign to promote that one candidate.

That unfortunately for me, has been elcted to be my wife.

Wait, wait..........are you saying..........that our very own oscar is a candidate for public office?

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 11:16 am

Peter Lake;1462124 wrote:

It has been deemed and made official that our city has only one parliamentary candidate for the party in a ward of the city rather than stand various candidates.

Call me thick but I am not getting what you mean here.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 11:25 am

Bruv;1462129 wrote: Call me thick but I am not getting what you mean here.

Don't worry Bruv, this is all new to me also and i may not have explained adequately.

Rather than the party no doubt losing deposits and resources in every ward of the city by standing several candidates in different wards, they decided to use those funds to promote one candidate only and use all resources and monies into one single candidate that stood a better chance than others.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 11:27 am

AnneBoleyn;1462128 wrote: The pledge behind this is that the party throw their full weight into a giant campaign to promote that one candidate.

That unfortunately for me, has been elcted to be my wife.

Wait, wait..........are you saying..........that our very own oscar is a candidate for public office? Yes.

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 1:11 pm

Peter Lake;1462131 wrote: Don't worry Bruv, this is all new to me also and i may not have explained adequately.

Rather than the party no doubt losing deposits and resources in every ward of the city by standing several candidates in different wards, they decided to use those funds to promote one candidate only and use all resources and monies into one single candidate that stood a better chance than others.
So the right wing revival lack the financial wherewithal ?

You would have thought all the MEPs would have chipped in with their exorbitant wages and expenses for the cause.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 1:22 pm

Bruv;1462138 wrote: So the right wing revival lack the financial wherewithal ?

You would have thought all the MEPs would have chipped in with their exorbitant wages and expenses for the cause.

It's nothing to do with lacking financially. It's about not throwing money down the drain in wards where candidates stand little chance and using the combined finances to promote one candidate that stands a better chance than others and bringing about a far greater swing to the party rather than losses throughout the city. One M.E.P has been expelled by the ex party chairman, the other will be assisting of course.

gmc · Post by **gmc** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 1:25 pm

She doesn't have to win outright all she has to do is be the least unpopular candidate. Have look at george galloways campaign in bradford arguably it was a protest vote

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 1:32 pm

gmc;1462142 wrote: She doesn't have to win outright all she has to do is be the least unpopular candidate. Have look at george galloways campaign in bradford arguably it was a protest vote

You've hit the nail right on the head gmc. The ward has been selected where the greatest swing is likely and where she's known in those communities.

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 1:33 pm

gmc;1462142 wrote: She doesn't have to win outright all she has to do is be the least unpopular candidate. Have look at george galloways campaign in bradford arguably it was a protest vote

Or as they say "Lethargy Rules UK"

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 1:41 pm

Bruv;1462144 wrote: Or as they say "Lethargy Rules UK" The trend for the 2005 general election for that ward showed her party candidate did quite well even against U.K.I.P and despite being an unknown name in the ward and very little in the way of a campaign. I don't think lethargy or turn out has anything to do with it. I'm with gmc on the lines of protest votes and familiarisation with the candidate this time round and the party throwing all resources into campaigning.

FourPart · Post by **FourPart** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:01 pm

I thought there was some sort of legislation that barred candidates with criminal records from standing for Parliament. Of course, in Oscar's case it would probably win her some votes.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:55 pm

FourPart;1462153 wrote: I thought there was some sort of legislation that barred candidates with criminal records from standing for Parliament. Of course, in Oscar's case it would probably win her some votes.

The candidate is not vetted by the house of commons but by the party they represent.

They must obtain ten signatures and nominations from residents on the electoral register from within that ward.

Standing for Parliament - UK Parliament

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:46 am

Peter Lake;1462124 wrote: ... i'm interested in how you the voter choose the candidate that attracts your cross on the ballot sheet.

What qualities do you look for or do you go by party alone? ... I welcome all genuine suggestions.

Knowing Oscar as I do, I'd say that she has the one most desirable quality that any candidate can ever hope to have - FROM MY OWN PERSONAL POINT OF VIEW - and that is she dares to speak openly about the subject that no one else wants to even take a poke at. However, I still wouldn't vote for her if that's the ONLY issue she's standing upon and/or if her judgement/remedy seems too radical.

Discussing the problem with immigration is often linked with racism, xenophobia and extreme-rightism. You and I know this is not necessarily true, but it is being argued that way. So one needs to be thought of as struggling for other, less controversial matters as well. This seems to be the problem Oscar is grappling with.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 7:11 am

High Threshold;1462279 wrote: Knowing Oscar as I do, I'd say that she has the one most desirable quality that any candidate can ever hope to have - FROM MY OWN PERSONAL POINT OF VIEW - and that is she dares to speak openly about the subject that no one else wants to even take a poke at. However, I still wouldn't vote for her if that's the ONLY issue she's standing upon and/or if her judgement/remedy seems too radical.

Discussing the problem with immigration is often linked with racism, xenophobia and extreme-rightism. You and I know this is not necessarily true, but it is being argued that way. So one needs to be thought of as struggling for other, less controversial matters as well. This seems to be the problem Oscar is grappling with. This is exactly the constructive criticism i hoped for and you have raised an objective that is perfectly valid given the preconceived notions of party line.

This is exactly what was discussed long into the night regarding the campaign. Does she go by party line, a personal stance or a combination of the two?

Without giving away campaign tactics, her region who will be throwing most of the weight behind her campaign, agree's with Oscar that she persue a more personal line.

Oscar as it happens, doesn't always agree with party line and as you pointed out, she's not afraid to say so.

Oscar has local isssue's such as the continual housing developments being built on greenbelt, the badger cull, the lack of school places to name a few. When it comes to the campaign, there will be much street activity to source what affects local people the most. She then believes it better to go down this route given her priority in all of this is to represent those people as she has done for many years in her community.

If you look at voting trends in this country, any candidate will attract an average of 5 percent of the vote just for the party they represent. As i pointed out, the 2005 candidate for that ward did rather well despite being unknown in that ward. A personal approach could increase the vote and see a gretaer swing to the party but we also have to bear in mind that proprtion of the electorate who wants to see party line represented.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 7:34 am

Peter Lake;1462285 wrote: This is exactly the constructive criticism i hoped for and you have raised an objective that is perfectly valid given the preconceived notions of party line.

This is exactly what was discussed long into the night regarding the campaign. Does she go by party line, a personal stance or a combination of the two?

Without giving away campaign tactics, her region who will be throwing most of the weight behind her campaign, agree's with Oscar that she persue a more personal line.

Oscar as it happens, doesn't always agree with party line and as you pointed out, she's not afraid to say so.

Oscar has local isssue's such as the continual housing developments being built on greenbelt, the badger cull, the lack of school places to name a few. When it comes to the campaign, there will be much street activity to source what affects local people the most. She then believes it better to go down this route given her priority in all of this is to represent those people as she has done for many years in her community.

If you look at voting trends in this country, any candidate will attract an average of 5 percent of the vote just for the party they represent. As i pointed out, the 2005 candidate for that ward did rather well despite being unknown in that ward. A personal approach could increase the vote and see a gretaer swing to the party but we also have to bear in mind that proprtion of the electorate who wants to see party line represented.

Is Oscar listening?

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 7:46 am

Then why stand for The Party?

Some people will vote for The Party if a muppet stands, others will NOT vote for The Party if their mother was standing.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 8:28 am

Bruv;1462291 wrote: Then why stand for The Party?

Some people will vote for The Party if a muppet stands, others will NOT vote for The Party if their mother was standing.

It's called courage of your convictions. I doubt that when any voter chooses which party to vote for, they agree with every single policy but will agree with most. If you agree with a larger majority of that parties policy than a few policies of another party, then that's what you'd vote for.

There will be people who vote for the party, there will be people who will vote for her and there will be people who may be put off by the party she represents but it's about calculating the better option. Why should she sell out out her convictions, beliefs and status in the party to run the risk of standing as an independent when there could be a way of merging the two and bring about a swing for the party?

FourPart · Post by **FourPart** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 9:54 am

I suppose this is where Proportional Representation comes into its own.

Whilst UKIP did amazingly well at the MEP Elections, after seeing the ballot slips, with about 16 candidates on & most of them with basically the same policies as UKIP, I can't help feeling that if they hadn't been standing, then the UKIP victory would have practically been a whitewash.

I seem to remember hearing that in Northern Ireland they use some sort of elimination voting system, with the eliminated parties nominating who they apportion their votes to.

AnneBoleyn · Post by **AnneBoleyn** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 11:27 am

High Threshold;1462290 wrote: Is Oscar listening?

Oscar is Always Listening! Not much escapes her attention.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 11:33 am

:)AnneBoleyn;1462321 wrote: Oscar is Always Listening! Not much escapes her attention.

It's just that I've never known her to be so quite before!

Post by **Peter Lake** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 11:45 am

High Threshold;1462322 wrote:

It's just that I've never known her to be so quite before! She's just so busy at the moment and along with the election she's been offered a promotion that would make her a king pin in the party. She has an enormous amount of research to carry out now along with everything else she does in the community, the home and her horse racing trips to support the management there. At least there, she can switch off and enjoy her passion. She will be back as often as she can as she won't forget she has her friends here.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 12:15 pm

Peter Lake;1462323 wrote: She's just so busy at the moment and along with the election she's been offered a promotion that would make her a king pin in the party. She has an enormous amount of research to carry out now along with everything else she does in the community, the home and her horse racing trips to support the management there. At least there, she can switch off and enjoy her passion. She will be back as often as she can as she won't forget she has her friends here.

And there you sit with the dog, both of you enjoying life to the fullest. It is refreshing to see a man who knows what's what.

:):)

Post by **Peter Lake** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 12:40 pm

[QUOTE=High Threshold;1462327]And there you sit with the dog, QUOTE]

Ahem, and who do you think is the chauffeur when madam needs to be somewhere? :rolleyes::wah:

FourPart · Post by **FourPart** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 2:25 pm

Peter Lake;1462332 wrote:

Ahem, and who do you think is the chauffeur when madam needs to be somewhere? :rolleyes::wah:
And how long before your salary is charged to expenses?

Post by **Peter Lake** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 2:31 pm

FourPart;1462339 wrote: And how long before your salary is charged to expenses? It'll be a labour of love for my little rottweiler :wah:

gmc · Post by **gmc** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 2:38 pm

Peter Lake;1462340 wrote: It'll be a labour of love for my little rottweiler :wah:

How dare you imply she is a bitch - Attack wife is the correct term.

Does she get to wear jackboots and carry a riding crop at the meetings?

Post by **Peter Lake** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 2:58 pm

gmc;1462341 wrote: How dare you imply she is a bitch - Attack wife is the correct term.

Does she get to wear jackboots and carry a riding crop at the meetings?

:wah:

As it happens, she favours attire reminiscent of Thatcher for meetings. She just needs to perfect that stooped walk and she's there.

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Mon Aug 18, 2014 3:29 pm

Peter Lake;1462344 wrote: She just needs to perfect that stooped walk and she's there.

What about the plummy school marm voice, thats a must.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Aug 19, 2014 9:42 am

Bruv;1462291 wrote: Then why stand for The Party?

.

I'll tell you why !!

Whether you like the Party or not, whether anyone agree's with the Party or not, fact remains, we are a Bono Fide registered Party.

The Party Is continually evolving and It has evolved since the days It was registered In 1982.

If you look at the objectives of the Labour Party when It was first formed In the late 19th century and became the major opposition of the Conservative Party during the early 1920's, It's objectives were to represent the working class movement as It evolved out of the Trade Union Movement. Today's Labour Party Is far removed from those early days. One could even argue that today's Labour Party has abandoned those principles under Blair to encourage mass Immigration which In turn has made competition for British jobs that much difficult, but I digress.

The point Is, all Parties evolve and In the case of my Party, we are In political sense, a new Party that continues to evolve. However, the biased media over the past few decades has suspended the Party In a virtual state of perpetual, suspended animation by the personna the media has created.

I am not saying for one moment that we do not attract Idiots. Every Party attracts Idiots but no Chairman can carry out a Physiological Profile Assessment before accepting members. UKIP has Idiots, one recently called for all poofers to be shot.

The Labour Party has had numerous elected Councillors convicted of child abuse. The Tory Party has had MP's convicted of fraud. So while It would be ridiculous to claim that all Labour members are child abusers and all Tories are crooks, It is equal nonsense to claim everyone In my Party Is a tattoo'd Neanderthal, Hitler loving Nazi. In fact far from It.... I myself, last week, took measures to ensure that one woman never gets a foothold In our region or Party ever again because people like me, don't actually want morons like that dragging us down because we know through the media, one moron like her Is all the media would report on and not the good we have done.

The Party Is full of people who want change and often, to tar them with the same brush Is totally unfair when younger key figures rising through the ranks were not part of the NF movement, were children during the NF movement or were not even born during the NF movement. The sole objective from the media Is to keep the Party from being returned to Westminster and disrupting Parliament as they think we would. It's easy for them to do that by forever tarring us with the same brush as Tyndall and the early movements. We have been portrayed as a totalitarian dictatorship that unless you have ever been Inside the Party, ever worked closly with the Chairman and key figures, then you have absolutely no Idea of whether that Is true or not.

What has happened over the decades, Is that, due to over political correctness and biased media, the average voter who may agree with part of the Parties constitution has been deterred from the Party for fear of being branded racist and tarred with the same brush as Tyndall. Most of England Is concerned about mass Immigration, the seing to UKIP In the EU elections proved that, but a culture of fear has been created by PC and the Equality Commission.

It perpetually deters normal, decent people from the courage of their convictions to join or Indeed represent the Party for fear of being vilified by media. So It's been an easy job for the left to keep the Party out of Westminster.

Until, normal non racist people who see the Party evolving have the balls to stand up and represent the Party, the Party will remain In that suspended animation of 1982.

When they do and the media and the left find there Is absolutely nothing to throw at those people as they have done with the Chairman, the Party will Indeed evolve for the better.

It's hypocritical In the extreme that those who want the Party disolved because of their preconceived notions of the people within the Party actually allow a biased media and hate campaign In order to stop a Party that they despise from changing for the bteer In the future. Without those people willing to stick their necks out and represent the Party, no change will ever come.

gmc · Post by **gmc** » Tue Aug 19, 2014 1:47 pm

Peter Lake;1462344 wrote: :wah:

As it happens, she favours attire reminiscent of Thatcher for meetings. She just needs to perfect that stooped walk and she's there.

NO NO NO Don't do it oscar or you'll lose the northern vote not to mention the scottish, mind you BNP in scotland is even rarer than the tories. That's it imitate thatcher and you are persona non grata. Go for the buddicca look instead. Should get you column inches if nothing else.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Aug 19, 2014 2:01 pm

gmc;1462400 wrote: NO NO NO Don't do it oscar or you'll lose the northern vote not to mention the scottish, mind you BNP in scotland is even rarer than the tories. That's it imitate thatcher and you are persona non grata. Go for the buddicca look instead. Should get you column inches if nothing else.

I like It.

You know, you may just have given me an Idea for the promtional leaflet hmmmmm

Now, do you know where I can get a chariot and bull whip for the photo shoot?

Post by **Peter Lake** » Tue Aug 19, 2014 2:54 pm

gmc;1462400 wrote: . Go for the buddicca look instead. Should get you column inches if nothing else. I love it, a subliminal perception of power over the invader:wah:

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Tue Aug 19, 2014 3:11 pm

Oscar Namechange;1462394 wrote: I'll tell you why!!......................................................................................................................................................................

I am not saying for one moment that we do n. Without those people willing to stick their necks out and represent the Party, no change will ever come.

I only asked.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Tue Aug 19, 2014 8:50 pm

Peter Lake;1462344 wrote: :wah:

As it happens, she favours attire reminiscent of Thatcher for meetings. She just needs to perfect that stooped walk and she's there.

Well off-topic now but I worked for the RAF in Germany back when Thatcher was campaigning. We listened a lot to BFBS in those days and I remember that Maggie was given voice lessons to combat her high-pitched â€whineâ€. I think that's when I started to see how Tinseltown-ish the world of politics really is. :wah:

Post by **Peter Lake** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 8:06 am

High Threshold;1462411 wrote: Well off-topic now but I worked for the RAF in Germany back when Thatcher was campaigning. We listened a lot to BFBS in those days and I remember that Maggie was given voice lessons to combat her high-pitched â€whineâ€. I think that's when I started to see how Tinseltown-ish the world of politics really is. :wah:

Oscar has spoken many times on BBC radio and given speeches to large amounts of people and had no complaints so far but there's always room for improvement with any speaker.

gmc · Post by **gmc** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 8:14 am

Peter Lake;1462404 wrote: I love it, a subliminal perception of power over the invader:wah:

Not really she lost if you remember. Scared the **** our of the romans for a while though.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 8:23 am

gmc;1462425 wrote: Not really she lost if you remember. Scared the **** our of the romans for a while though.

She did lead the uprising of the occupation of the roman empire. There's a subliminal connection to Oscar there :wah:

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 8:30 am

Peter Lake;1462424 wrote: Oscar has spoken many times on BBC radio and given speeches to large amounts of people and had no complaints so far but there's always room for improvement with any speaker.

She's a "better man" than I then. I fall completely to pieces speaking for large groups of strangers .... unless I know the subject EXTREMELY well.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 8:37 am

High Threshold;1462427 wrote: She's a "better man" than I then. I fall completely to pieces speaking for large groups of strangers .... unless I know the subject EXTREMELY well.

There's no denying she was nervous to begin with as anyone would be but the key is to get the research done and memorise the subject to perfection along with an air of confidence that you do actually know what you're talking about. I'm the same as you in that i couldn't do it at all.

This is for bruv. Part of an e mail doing the rounds this morning.

" J---- was appointed by A---- W----r and so he must have every faith in her abilities to do the job and in fact she was ---------------

Enough said !

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 12:42 pm

Peter Lake;1462428 wrote:

This is for bruv. Part of an e mail doing the rounds this morning.

" J---- was appointed by A---- W----r and so he must have every faith in her abilities to do the job and in fact she was ---------------

Enough said !

Why for me?

Is this a competition.....

Are we supposed to fill in the Blankety Blanks ?

Aryan Winker ?

She was fantabidosey ?

FourPart · Post by **FourPart** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 5:16 pm

Well, she's got the horses - and possibly a buggy for a chariot. Just stick a couple of swords in the wheels & she's made.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Wed Aug 20, 2014 5:43 pm

FourPart;1462450 wrote: Well, she's got the horses - and possibly a buggy for a chariot. Just stick a couple of swords in the wheels & she's made.

If push comes to shove, we could use our elderly neighbour's shopping cart :wah:

We put the idea of Boudica as a promotional logo to a few today and they liked it. It will go to the committee vote at the meeting next week. gmc, never a true word spoken in jest.

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Thu Aug 21, 2014 6:28 am

Peter Lake;1462453 wrote: If push comes to shove, we could use our elderly neighbour's shopping cart :wah:

We put the idea of Boudica as a promotional logo to a few today and they liked it. It will go to the committee vote at the meeting next week. gmc, never a true word spoken in jest.

But she was a noble failure.............................................................Finally, Boudicca was defeated by a Roman army led by Paulinus. Many Britons were killed and Boudicca is thought to have poisoned herself to avoid capture.

Here

Post by **Peter Lake** » Fri Aug 22, 2014 2:31 pm

Bruv;1462475 wrote: But she was a noble failure.............................................................Finally, Boudicca was defeated by a Roman army led by Paulinus. Many Britons were killed and Boudicca is thought to have poisoned herself to avoid capture.

Here

Wiki is so useful at times.

We're running with the idea of a slogan, something along the lines of " told you so, See? So ner ! ". Or possibly " vote for me or else".

I think it'll catch on. :rolleyes:

gmc · Post by **gmc** » Sat Aug 23, 2014 7:06 am

Peter Lake;1462426 wrote: She did lead the uprising of the occupation of the roman empire. There's a subliminal connection to Oscar there :wah:

Well people do make the connection between the roman empire, the holy roman empire and the eu but it's a stretch.

She will need to decide what name to use and keep to it.

How come you need to look up buddicca? as a true briton I thought you would have know the story. I'd be wary how you use he image it could backfire somewht if you're not careful. I can just see griffin in a cartoon standing behind you dressed as one of your handmaidens.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sat Aug 23, 2014 8:23 am

gmc;1462620 wrote: Well people do make the connection between the roman empire, the holy roman empire and the eu but it's a stretch.

She will need to decide what name to use and keep to it.

How come you need to look up buddicca? as a true briton I thought you would have know the story. I'd be wary how you use he image it could backfire somewht if you're not careful. I can just see griffin in a cartoon standing behind you dressed as one of your handmaidens.

I think Peter meant that Bruv had sneaked a peep at Wikki not me :wah:

I got 3 new fish today.... there's a sleek one I called Sprinter Sacre, a little Gold Jobby, I called Sire De Grugy after my favourite race horses and a black one, one of those bottom feeders with a big gob, we called Nick Griffin.

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sat Aug 23, 2014 9:48 am

Oscar Namechange;1462630 wrote: I think Peter meant that Bruv had sneaked a peep at Wikki not me :wah:

Bruv gave a link to the quote......no shame attached to being ignorant of some facts is there?

FourPart · Post by **FourPart** » Sat Aug 23, 2014 9:55 am

Oscar Namechange;1462630 wrote: I got 3 new fish today.... there's a sleek one I called Sprinter Sacre, a little Gold Jobby, I called Sire De Grugy after my favourite race horses and a black one, one of those bottom feeders with a big gob, we called Nick Griffin.
ROFL

(I presume you mean a Sucker Loach - I used to keep Tropical Fish as well - every tank should have a few SLs)

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sat Aug 23, 2014 9:55 am

Bruv;1462643 wrote: Bruv gave a link to the quote......no shame attached to being ignorant of some facts is there? It's actually refreshing to see such an admission.