What pregnancy?

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 7:28 am

I just want to vent for a minute. I am in my late twenties (very late) and my husband is in his mid thirties. We have been married for 2 years and we want a baby so bad!! I went through three rounds of fertility treatments (oral). In the past six months two of my oldest friends found out they were pregnant, my best friend's eighteen year old sister had a scare. Then at work, three of the women's daughters have just found out they are pregnant! WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN? I am so frustrated. Im very happy for them but I cant help feeling sorry for myself. I have been to two showers and have to struggle inside while I smile on the outside. This is absolute torture! We have been trying for nearly a year and its exhausting!! I am at my wits end and I cant stand it anymore. I pray all the time for a child and my best friend of 15 years has been praying for me every night. WTF is going on? Anyone out there as frustrated as me? It seems like I am surrounded by pregnant women!!! I cry everytime I see a baby on TV or a pregnant woman in a movie. I imagine myself finding a baby in a dumpster or in a ditch that I can rescue I am so desperate. Am I going crazy with depseration? Is this normal behavior? Am I psychotic over this?

pantsonfire321@aol.com · Fri Oct 14, 2005 7:43 am

I feel for you i really do - i have a sixteen yearold but would love another and have been trying for about six years. I had a pregnancy that had to be terminated for medical reasons about 5 years ago and hope every month that i will fall. Dont give up hope it may happen when you least expect it - try not to stress - it will happen.

Rapunzel · Post by **Rapunzel** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 9:29 am

Don't know if this is good news or bad for you gals...but just wanted to say KEEP TRYING!

My son is 14 and my daughter is 12. When she was 1 1/2 (about 20 months) she had a very severe asthma attack and was put on life support. The doctors told us she wouldn't make it. Well, Thank God, she DID pull through BUT I was expecting twins at the time and miscarried them because of all the stress.

I have wanted another baby for the last 10 years. This year I have had two sets of laser treatment for cancer - the first treament didn't get rid of it all! The doctor said if the second treatment doesn't work (we'll know in a few months) then I will have to have a hysterectomy. Oh, and I have also been diagnosed with diabetes this year!

I was quite upset because I knew that I would never haveanother baby now.........only to find out that I'm pregnant!!! You could have knocked me down with a feather!!

I've waited 10 1/2 years, I'm cuddly (ahem!) as in more like a teddy bear than a barbie doll!, I have had treatment for cancer, I have diabetes and I'm 40+!

So, if it can happen to me, it can happen to you! Have LOTS of fun trying and relax and try not to worry about it! When I thought I couldn't wish for it anymore.....THATS when it happened!

Good Luck and Very Best Wishes to both of you! Hugs! R. xx

minks · Post by **minks** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 9:34 am

I can't offer any solutions, I can offer my understanding. I have had friends and family in your situation and it seemed the minute they stopped fretting and trying so hard they became pregnant, however this is not a "given". But I can only say, don't give up the faith.

Blessings to you and your husband.

pina · Post by **pina** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 11:37 am

I feel for you, it must be awful watching all these other women getting pregnant and not you, The only help I can offer is just what has already been said, keep trying, it will happen. :-4

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 1:19 pm

I had a friend that tried for 10+ years. She tried everything imaginable. Finally, her husband had his sperm count done. The doctor told them to give up because as low as his sperm count was, there was no chance of her becoming pregnant. She quit trying and is now the mother of a 17 year old son, miscarried in her second pregnancy, and has a 5 year old daughter.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 1:23 pm

My husband's been checked. That was the first test they ran. But I shaved my legs last night and my temp was slightly elevated so ONCE AGAIN...we'll see.

mominiowa · Post by **mominiowa** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 1:51 pm

My heart goes out to you......My sister in law has the same feelings as you-- you are not alone..We come from a family of 12 kids...everyone has 4 or more besides one brother...then there is my brother Doug...He waited to meet the most wonderful girl..he was the last to get married - but not the baby of the family...he has financially become a very well off person.he has enough love to share with a dozen kids....his wife is just a doll and they are so in love that it would make a normal person jealous as hell.........so whats the problem? She has had AI done twice and her tubes are so twisted and turned that she is in incredible pain when they do it...His sperm count is so low that the doc said don't hope for a miricle...It breaks my heart to see their friends pregnant and when we have more nieces and nephews - and now 5 Great- ones..I even have a young niece that is expecting and is to young to be having this baby......all of this surrounds her all the time and she fights back her tears.....she did tell me...the thing she hates to hear the most is: "Don't try- your trying to hard...and finally - it will happen if it is meant to be..." So I will say a pray for you - and keep my fingers crossed......and hope you are blesses with a baby or 3!! HUGS to you!!

Jives · Post by **Jives** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 2:06 pm

DesignerGal wrote: We have been trying for nearly a year and its exhausting!!

ROFL! I'm terribly sorry. I know you are so frustrated, but that line just made me laugh for some reason.

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 3:27 pm

Hey DG. Hang in there. Have they checked your fallopian tubes? Mine were so "long and tortuous" there was never any doubt about why I either could not get pregnant (the egg died before it got near the uterus) or I had ectopic pregnancies (3 of them). Out of 5 pregnancies I somehow managed to have one child. It is frustrating when you desire a child so badly. Like everyone else says - try to relax a bit - I know that's not what you want to hear. I wish you all the luck in the world. Try to think of sex as love making and not baby making. :-3

Wolverine · Post by **Wolverine** » Sat Oct 15, 2005 5:16 am

DesignerGal wrote: ...I went through three rounds of fertility treatments (oral)....

well lady. that might be your problem.

OK. I'm done. i'll be good.

wait........ i'll try to be good.

grizabela · Post by **grizabela** » Sun Oct 16, 2005 10:01 pm

DesignerGal, I've been where you are, and know the feeling is not a good one. Fortunately, my story had a happy ending--or should I say 3 of them. After years of infertility treatments, surgery for malformed tubes and polycystic ovaries, I was ready to rip the heads off well-meaning people who told me to 'relax' (yeah, right). We adopted our first daughter when I was nearly 30, and our second one when I was 32--at which time I found that I was 2 months pregnant with our son. Doctor had found my natural steroid level was sky-high, so treated me with artificial steroids and Clomid.

I'm not making light of your situation, or telling you that it WILL happen, but just letting you know (what you undoubtedly already know) that there are other options. No, adoption is not for everyone, but it does bear some thought. Also, have you tried invitro fertilization? My oldest daughter had problems and went through it. Hers was successful, and she had a beautiful boy 18 months ago.

Whatever you choose to do, I am saying a prayer that you will be blessed with a child. If you need to talk to someone, I can loan you both ears--anytime.