Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

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AussiePam
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by AussiePam »

My wooden rolling pin has done sterling service. It has rolled out pastry for pies, crushed biscuits for cheesecake bases, flattened gladwrapped meat for schnitzel, etc. The end has pounded spices.

Cartoons like to portray the wife in curlers and nightdress waiting at the door for the errant husband branshishing a rolling pin. Not me, Sport!!

Today, however, I found my rolling pin in a very sorry, shredded state in my kitchen. Had my son (who occasionally cooks things) needed perhaps to defend himself against alien invasion??????

NO

One of the attributes which apparently set humans apart from the rest of the animal kingdom is their resourcefulness, their use of tools. Their willingness to fight the slings and arrows of life's little challenges. To be fair, my son's first WMD was my steel, a fairly lethal object used to sharpen carving knives etc. But that wasn't up to it and snapped in two.. Goodbye, faithful companion of roast dinners .. sigh. So it had to be the rolling pin.

The rolling pin too, gave its life in vain.

THE COCONUT IS STILL UNOPENED, BARELY EVEN DENTED, AND SITTING SMUGLY ON THE KITCHEN BENCH

Requiescat in pace...

And buy me another steel and another rolling pin, ya nerd!!!
"Life is too short to ski with ugly men"

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Rapunzel
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by Rapunzel »

You need to throw them onto concrete to smash them - the coconuts that is!

I don't know how to open them without losing the coconut milk though, if thats what your son wants.

I'm sorry for the loss of your rolling pin and steel, good sturdy kitchen implements are hard to find and you must regret their loss, even for such a worthy cause! :wah:

Good luck in finding worthy replacements. (Maybe you could test out the replacements by bopping your son over the head with them?) :sneaky:

;):wah:
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abbey
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by abbey »

AussiePam;1247708 wrote: My wooden rolling pin has done sterling service. It has rolled out pastry for pies, crushed biscuits for cheesecake bases, flattened gladwrapped meat for schnitzel, etc. The end has pounded spices.



Cartoons like to portray the wife in curlers and nightdress waiting at the door for the errant husband branshishing a rolling pin. Not me, Sport!!



Today, however, I found my rolling pin in a very sorry, shredded state in my kitchen. Had my son (who occasionally cooks things) needed perhaps to defend himself against alien invasion??????



NO



One of the attributes which apparently set humans apart from the rest of the animal kingdom is their resourcefulness, their use of tools. Their willingness to fight the slings and arrows of life's little challenges. To be fair, my son's first WMD was my steel, a fairly lethal object used to sharpen carving knives etc. But that wasn't up to it and snapped in two.. Goodbye, faithful companion of roast dinners .. sigh. So it had to be the rolling pin.



The rolling pin too, gave its life in vain.



THE COCONUT IS STILL UNOPENED, BARELY EVEN DENTED, AND SITTING SMUGLY ON THE KITCHEN BENCH



Requiescat in pace...



And buy me another steel and another rolling pin, ya nerd!!!:wah: Good post.

My dad always used a six inch nail and a hammer to Peirce the eyes then tapped around the middle with a cleaver and et voilà. ;)

If all else failed He'd use a house brick! :wah:
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AussiePam
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by AussiePam »

I'll try it Rapunzel. And thank you for your kind sympathy in my time of sorrow.. :sneaky:

Abbey - apparently Number One Son did consider using a hammer and nail, but decided that might be insanitary... sigh.

I did have a meat cleaver, but used it so rarely that it was one bit of kitchen gear I abandoned earlier this year when moving house. My local butcher will cut for me anything (non-human!!) that needs cleaving.

Coconuts have been banned forthwith from this apartment !!!!!!!! :-5

:D
"Life is too short to ski with ugly men"

Hugh Janus
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Joined: Sun Jun 25, 2006 10:55 am

Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by Hugh Janus »

try this, it seems to cover your problem...:)

How to open a coconut, learn how to open coconuts
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AussiePam
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by AussiePam »

Cool !! Thanks Huge!
"Life is too short to ski with ugly men"

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Raven
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by Raven »

AussiePam;1247708 wrote: My wooden rolling pin has done sterling service. It has rolled out pastry for pies, crushed biscuits for cheesecake bases, flattened gladwrapped meat for schnitzel, etc. The end has pounded spices.



Cartoons like to portray the wife in curlers and nightdress waiting at the door for the errant husband branshishing a rolling pin. Not me, Sport!!



Today, however, I found my rolling pin in a very sorry, shredded state in my kitchen. Had my son (who occasionally cooks things) needed perhaps to defend himself against alien invasion??????



NO



One of the attributes which apparently set humans apart from the rest of the animal kingdom is their resourcefulness, their use of tools. Their willingness to fight the slings and arrows of life's little challenges. To be fair, my son's first WMD was my steel, a fairly lethal object used to sharpen carving knives etc. But that wasn't up to it and snapped in two.. Goodbye, faithful companion of roast dinners .. sigh. So it had to be the rolling pin.



The rolling pin too, gave its life in vain.



THE COCONUT IS STILL UNOPENED, BARELY EVEN DENTED, AND SITTING SMUGLY ON THE KITCHEN BENCH



Requiescat in pace...



And buy me another steel and another rolling pin, ya nerd!!!


Oh dear...:yh_laugh

I feel really sorry for that coconut ..... I can Dirty Harry now..."do you feel lucky...well do you..Punk!"
~Quoth the Raven, Nevermore!~
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Oscar Namechange
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by Oscar Namechange »

I have a rolling pin that belonged to my Great Grand mother. Legend has it that she used it to beat a burgler senseless one night.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning, we will remember them. R.L. Binyon
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TenneseeGirl
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by TenneseeGirl »

Thats one brave coconut!
~~~~~

Just some food for thought. Swallow it or not that's up to you.:lips:
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AussiePam
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Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by AussiePam »

TenneseeGirl;1247819 wrote: Thats one brave coconut!


I was waiting for someone to come in and take the side of the bloody coconut!!! Coconuts have feelings, right?!!! And do not deserve to be stuck in the kitchen, naked and battered. This is abuse of the very worst kind.

Coconuts of the world unite

Can't you just hear it?? Next you know they'll be lounging on a beach somewhere....



:sneaky:

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"Life is too short to ski with ugly men"

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AussiePam
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Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2006 8:57 pm

Requiem for a Rolling Pin !!

Post by AussiePam »

OK That's it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

POOKLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've just received seventy three furious messages from clueless loser, do-gooders who are apparently "aghast, outraged, flabberghasted and generally appalled" by the alleged mistreatment of coconuts in my house!!!!



I shall make no further comment - my lawyers will be releasing a statement in due course.

:lips::lips::lips::lips:
"Life is too short to ski with ugly men"

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