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Why Women are Crabby



We started to "bud" in our blouses at 9 or 10 years old only to find that anything that came in contact with those tender, blooming buds hurt so bad it brought us to tears. So came the ridiculously uncomfortable training bra contraption that the boys in school would snap until we had calluses on our backs.

Next, we get our periods in our early to mid-teens (or sooner). Along with those budding boobs, we bloated, we cramped, we got the hormone crankies, had to wear little mattresses between our legs or insert tubular, packed cotton rods in places we didn't even know we had.

Our next little rite of passage (premarital or not) was having sex for the first time which was about as much fun as having a ramrod push your uterus through your nostrils (IF he did it right and didn't end up with his little cart before his horse), leaving us to wonder what all the fuss was about.

Then it' was off to Motherhood where we learned to live on dry crackers and water for a few months so we didn't spend the entire day leaning over Brother John. Of course, amazing creatures that we are (and we are), we learned to live with the growing little angels inside us steadily kicking our innards night and day making us wonder if we were preparing to have Rosemary's Baby.

Our once flat bellies looked like we swallowed a watermelon whole and we pee'd our pants every time we sneezed. When the big moment arrived, the dam in our blessed Nether Regions invariably burst right in the middle of the mall and we had to waddle, with our big cartoon feet, moaning in pain all the way to the ER.

Then it was huff and puff and beg to die while the OB says, "Please stop screaming, Mrs. Hearmeroar. Calm down and push. Just one more good push (more like 10)," warranting a strong, well-deserved impulse to punch the ***** (and hubby) square in the nose for making us cram a wiggling, mushroom-headed 10lb bowling ball through a keyhole.

After that, it was time to raise those angels only to find that when all that "cute" wears off, the beautiful little darlings morphed into walking, jabbering, wet, gooey, snot-blowing, life-sucking little poop machines.

Then come their teen years. Need I say more?



When the kids are almost grown, we women hit our voracious sexual prime in our early 40's - while hubby had his somewhere around his 18th birthday.

So we progress into the grand finale: "The Menopause," the Grandmother of all womanhood. It's either take HRT and chance cancer in those now seasoned "buds" or the aforementioned Nether Regions, or, sweat like a hog in July, wash your sheets and pillowcases daily and bite the head off anything that moves.

Now, you ask WHY women seem to be more spiteful than men when men get off so easy INCLUDING the icing on life's cake: Being able to pee in the woods without soaking their socks...

So, while I love being a woman, "Womanhood" would make the Great Gandhi a tad crabby. Women are the "weaker sex"? Yeah right. Bite me.

Well said, and so true!

Q - What's the difference between men and women?

A - Men are crabby all month long. :p

:yh_rotfl Thanks for the laugh you two!

Girls, you crease me up!!! As I`ve heard other women say, "If it was MEN who had periods, they would have been made illegal by now!"

how disgusting and what child wears a bra at nine and 10 years old. too many hormones in the milk where you come from. anyone who is crabby is unhealthy and needs a good boot in the butt? no excuse to complain about cramps, boobs and boys, don't feel sorry for yourself, its life, its what you make it. Crabby, so is that why women shot & kill men? NO crabby here. :-6

Hey Agnes....lighten up. It's a JOKE. You know, funny, haha, laughing....?



Get it? A J-O-K-E. Geez. :-5

i am light and not crabby, i just know those who use the F word are never funny at all. but really bras and female emotions are what you make them to be. :wah: yes i still have the time of the month, i love it!

TO P..AGNES.....:p



Don't Worry, Be Crabby



The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.



I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows. And a foundation leaks and a ball game gets rained out and a car rusts and...



Follow your dream! Unless it's the one where you're at work in your underwear during a fire drill.



Always take time to stop and smell the roses... and sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee.



Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either, Just leave me alone.



If you don't like my driving, don't call anyone. Just take another road. That's why the highway department made so many of them.



If a motorist cuts you off, just turn the other cheek. Nothing gets the message across like a good mooning.



When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It make the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

Wow BR thats given me loads to look forward too lmao i hope having a baby is not that bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol thanks for the post it was great

john8pies wrote: Girls, you crease me up!!! As I`ve heard other women say, "If it was MEN who had periods, they would have been made illegal by now!"In Ireland they say, the painters are in.:-5

Oh Poor Men.:-1

Thanks for the laugh BR.

Agnes wrote: how disgusting and what child wears a bra at nine and 10 years old. too many hormones in the milk where you come from. anyone who is crabby is unhealthy and needs a good boot in the butt? no excuse to complain about cramps, boobs and boys, don't feel sorry for yourself, its life, its what you make it. Crabby, so is that why women shot & kill men? NO crabby here. :-6
We are from a different era Agnes... I couldnt wait ti wear a bra.. was worried because I disnt get my friend until I was almost 16... Loved every moment of being pregnant..well not every moment... but that incredible feeling of movement.

I know its supposed to be a joke. Nowdays we refer to things in a whole different way.. everything gets made common. and crass. Time moving on threw me out of the catagory of liberal.. Im an old sentimental fart. I think the dialogue is disgusting also.. But then Im nobody so .... so what??

JAB wrote: For that alone you should have your head examined! :-2


thats means i am healthy, not altered by surgery or castrated. the longer you have the cycle the healthier, really. you dry up after menopause, who wants to dry up? its only once a month nature reminds you, you are still a woman! :-6 most of the time women with early changes have the most problems in their minds, i'm not there yet. :wah:

You never meet Crabby men, not even on FG:D

not usually crabby, men who are crab-apples can't type anyway. :wah:

It's because we THINK we have the burden of raising the children in this society. :yh_worshp

JAB wrote: I beg your pardon? Where in heaven's name did you come up with this one? Show me a medical study that proves this.


there is health literature that supports women with early menopause or removal of reproductive organs (early) changes behavior, they then need meds to cope. some women really require surgical procedures as they have problems, fine. i do not believe in doctors removing anything from my body i came to this earth with, nor do allow them to tinker with my body, doctors can create problems? there is no need to be a B!tch, there are too many books to educate us about our bodies & health. this is how i feel, some may feel different, i would also prefer to keep my teeth as long as possible, its all an individual choice? :-6

as far as a medical study i do not read medical books, i use a holistic approach which avoids the use of drugs. i am fortunate to be with one man my entire life and have no problems in the female system. so i celebrate all systems working as normal, including the brain at the moment. :-6

capt_buzzard wrote: In Ireland they say, the painters are in.:-5 Out California way they call it Flying the Flag

Oh well same difference I guess?

JAB wrote: This is pretty funny. If I'm a b*tch because I happen to question your opinion and ask you to back it up with some facts than you must run into a lot of b*tches in your life.

You also contradict yourself if first you state that a there is a lot of medical literature that supports your view yet you also state you don't read medical books. Which is it?

I'm happy you take a holistic approach to health. I try and do the same whenever possible. I'm not sure how old you are but the chances that you'll lose some part of your body that you came into this world with will increase the older you get.

And systems - including the brain - working as normal is always up for debate...


interesting and i meant the word B....for no one in particular. so you are over-reacting? i thought at first you to be a man, so why would i call you a B? so if you are a woman, you need not from me as i am not a trained medical physician explain anything!

i sympathize with you if you have had a problem here, i really feel something else is haunting you? you misinterpeted what i said, hope you are okay? this is a crabby woman for sure! :wah:

"And systems - including the brain - working as normal is always up for debate..."



:yh_rotfl



BR's joke: PRICELESS!!

BTS wrote: Out California way they call it Flying the Flag

Oh well same difference I guess?Poor Men:-1

Agnes wrote: thats means i am healthy, not altered by surgery or castrated. the longer you have the cycle the healthier, really. you dry up after menopause, who wants to dry up? its only once a month nature reminds you, you are still a woman! :-6 most of the time women with early changes have the most problems in their minds, i'm not there yet. :wah:
Agnes... I never needed my period to remind me I was a woman.. Six years ago I had my uterus taken out.. Not by choice. I grew a tumor the size of a two liter bottle of soda. That I can thank to the pesticides Ive handled all my life on stems of flowers. I challenge anyone to take those cramps on every month. I assure you I am not dried up. The concept of a female losing her mind after menopause, is a slur against women thought up by the male medical profession. Ignorant bunch of***** For any female approaching 50.. she better do some serious reading regarding the big M because its looming right around the corner, and there will be some decisions to make regarding HR therapy. Which I personally wouldnt touch with a ten foot pole.

weeder i am sorry for your surgery, did they have to entirely remove the organ? i guess so? apparently you are affected as you would not have mentioned it? women do have emotional issues in relation to the time of the month no doubt at all, some just have it worst than others, and others not as affected? reason to be crabby, absolutely. if you feel my opinons to be strong on the subject, you certainly would not want to hear the women i know who are into health. sorry to even mention. :-6

That was funny BR.

As for all that we women endure, well it could always be worse I suppose. And with each stage of womanhood no matter what organs you have or don't have, we are all individuals and how we choose to handle our circumstances determines how we view the joke I guess.

What some Women want:guitarist

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Oh oh...the women are calling each other "b1tches". I'm RUNNING FOR COVER!! :rolleyes:

I asked two young girls why they were fighting once and one told me, "She called me a "b1tch" in the third grade!"

Boy! Women can sure carry a grudge!

I've had all my "tackle" taken away and i'm fine!

Jives wrote: Oh oh...the women are calling each other "b1tches". I'm RUNNING FOR COVER!! :rolleyes:

I asked two young girls why they were fighting once and one told me, "She called me a "b1tch" in the third grade!"

Boy! Women can sure carry a grudge!


I don't know about that one Jives but my best girlfriends and I call each other that word as a joke to the world outside our friendship.