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If you are tired

old and expired

If drizzling makes you run to the dryer

If your man sits with a lady on the stage again



If you’re fed up with your own conjugal fort

If your in-laws are systematically calling for support

If your dad holds onto the railing again

If there is snow, and, surely, when there is fog

If it’s icy or there is a lot of smog



If all that is your destiny

And you ask if there is a recipe



Go Slap the doors then



Tear up your best dress

But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



Cry in your bed, bite in your cloth

Swear at your neighbor, shout from the rooftop

But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



Kick all around you, don’t be that lady

Do throw the tea cups and don’t say maybe



But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



Take a pair of scissors and cut into the plush

Give the notary’s wife a very icy douche

Yes, surely do it all

Make a big scandal

But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



If you’re down

If you are sick

If rheumatism makes your limbs loudly click

If the rain leaks through the roof on your spotless carpet



And your seven kids all ill from the changing climate



And no piece of food is in the Frigidaire

And mice are starving on the stairs

If your Austin collided on a pole

If the cat pukes on the mat you’d just adore

If you are poor as a church mouse

Must mop in a workhouse

If that all happens in your life

In every color every size still

Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



Jump into the canal or shortcut your hair



Marsh all the ladies onto Tahrir square

But DO STOP DO STOP WHINING



Go learn jujitsu, dance a striptease show

Piss in the mailbox, drop on the go



But Do Stop Do Stop WHINING



Go to the office and spit through the dream-hole

Pinch in the buttocks, Fry up your troll

Yes, surely Do it all



But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



Get fiercely drunk, hate all your boyfriends

Punch the director, Fire-up all pants

But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



Squeeze your parakeet, turn your cat dizzy

Say to the General: ”You are a sissy”

But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



Boy-a-boy-a-boy wha-a-t a show



Nothing really abnormal



Just do it overall

With a cannibal



But Do Stop, Do Stop WHINING



By a Dutch Woman named Annie, translated by Ellen Molenaar