ForumGarden

'OLD' IS WHEN...



Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs and make



love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't



do both!'





'OLD' IS WHEN...

Your friends compliment you on your new alligator



shoes and you're barefoot.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy

and your pacemaker opens the garage door.





'OLD' IS WHEN...



Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your



face.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

You don't care where your spouse goes,

just as long as you don't have to go along.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor



instead of by the police.





'OLD' IS WHEN...



'Getting a little action'

means you don't need to take any fiber today.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the



parking lot.





'OLD' IS WHEN...



An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the



bathroom.

As long as we can all laugh............................. :yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl

cars;1104372 wrote: 'OLD' IS WHEN...



Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs and make



love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't



do both!'





'OLD' IS WHEN...

Your friends compliment you on your new alligator



shoes and you're barefoot.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy

and your pacemaker opens the garage door.





'OLD' IS WHEN...



Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your



face.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

You don't care where your spouse goes,

just as long as you don't have to go along.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor



instead of by the police.





'OLD' IS WHEN...



'Getting a little action'

means you don't need to take any fiber today.





'OLD' IS WHEN...

'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the



parking lot.





'OLD' IS WHEN...



An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the



bathroom. TOOOOO funny:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl. But Darn it, it is true:( What the heck. i am glad i am not the only one here;)

none of those apply so i'm still young oh yea!!!!

Omni_Skittles;1104530 wrote: none of those apply so i'm still young oh yea!!!!
If you're lucky, they will one day! :wah::rolleyes:

old is also when you spend half the day preparing to go out and celebrate the new year but by 11-30pm the music is too loud,the flashing lights are giving you a migrain and your feet feel like theyve swollen to twice their size in your new shoes !!!

so where are you at midnight ?? home in front of the tv with a cup of tea............:rolleyes: :rolleyes::wah:

Great post! so true:wah:

Old is a privalige,denied to so many.

Mo xx

'OLD' IS WHEN...

You don't care where your spouse goes,

just as long as you don't have to go along.



I love it:yh_rotfl

Old is when your wife askes if you want 'super sex'

and you reply 'I will have the soup.'

Old is when:



A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water.



As the bartender gives her the drink she says,

I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday, and it's today...

The bartender says, 'Well then, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink.



In fact, this one is on me.



As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.'



'Coming right up,' says the bartender!

As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, 'I would like to buy you one, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.'

'Coming right up,' the bartender says.

As he gives her the drink, he says, 'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?'

The old woman replies, well 'Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor.



Now holding your water however, is a whole other issue!:wah::D:p

LMFAO!!!!!

Feeling old is when you hear the kids humming 'Tragedy' and when you say 'Oh, the Beegees huh?' They ask who they are and say don't be silly, we're singing to Steps!:-3

I heard this one---Why women in their 50's don't have babies-----BECAUSE THEY WOULD FORGET WHERE THEY WOULD PUT THEM. :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl Sadly i agree

:wah: Funny thread. My body may be getting older, but my heart and soul are still young. My mind.............that's another thing.

Attached files

along-for-the-ride;1105342 wrote: :wah: Funny thread. My body may be getting older, but my heart and soul are still young. My mind.............that's another thing. i couldn't have said it better, or more TRUER:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

'OLD' IS WHEN...

Your friends compliment you on your new alligator

shoes and you're barefoot.

Did you have to remind me:yh_rotfl

Since the SUBJECT of OLD, or let's say OLDER is brought up. Who here is going through the change of life. I loose the darnest things. it is the pits!! And forget ful. i could go on for days about that.:-2:-2:-:-3

southern yankee;1105474 wrote: Since the SUBJECT of OLD, or let's say OLDER is brought up. Who here is going through the change of life. I loose the darnest things. it is the pits!! And forget ful. i could go on for days about that.:-2:-2:-:-3


Not so much the change of life. But I have to write everything down or I totally forget it. Kids...what do they do to your brain?:wah:

qsducks;1105475 wrote: Not so much the change of life. But I have to write everything down or I totally forget it. Kids...what do they do to your brain?:wah: turn it to MUSH:yh_rotfl

Ain't that the truth? Your up late tonight.

qsducks;1105483 wrote: Ain't that the truth? Your up late tonight. well been out of touch for awhile. just trying catch up. with everyone:) I usely am up late. just not on the computer. I have had trouble sleeping for about 2 years. part of the change dear:(

Yeah I hear you there. Some nights I'm totally pooped out and other nights I'm flying high. But I am getting tired now. I have to get 3 kids & hubs out the door by 7:30am. Thought I would come here and chat a bit. Jeez, I hope daughter goes out tomorrow night earlier than she usually goes out which is at 8pm.:wah:

Hey, going to bed as I am tired. We had a wonderful dinner and it is sinkin in:wah: have a great night and I hopefully will see you tomorrow night.

qsducks;1105489 wrote: Yeah I hear you there. Some nights I'm totally pooped out and other nights I'm flying high. But I am getting tired now. I have to get 3 kids & hubs out the door by 7:30am. Thought I would come here and chat a bit. Jeez, I hope daughter goes out tomorrow night earlier than she usually goes out which is at 8pm.:wah: i heard something about taking calcium and magnesium an hour before bed may help. i will try that soon.

qsducks;1105491 wrote: Hey, going to bed as I am tired. We had a wonderful dinner and it is sinkin in:wah: have a great night and I hopefully will see you tomorrow night. nite dear:)

southern yankee;1105494 wrote: i heard something about taking calcium and magnesium an hour before bed may help. i will try that soon.


drugs are good to!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Odie;1105497 wrote: drugs are good to!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl they do the opposite for me. that SUCKS:(

Odie;1105497 wrote: drugs are good to!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl you know they worked for awhile. until i started these new meds. now the sleep meds. make me have leg twitches.

Old is when



You took pains caring for you body when young and





Attached files

southern yankee;1105474 wrote: Since the SUBJECT of OLD, or let's say OLDER is brought up. Who here is going through the change of life. I loose the darnest things. it is the pits!! And forget ful. i could go on for days about that.:-2:-2:-:-3


I have to write everything down or I instantly forget it. 4 kids do that to you. My calendar is loaded with appts, etc. I can get off the phone and instantly forget whatever date and have to write it down right away.:p

Old is when your teeth start smiling at you from a cup! yeah it's a classic

Old is when you can't remember what you said 5 minutes ago.

Old is when you forget how to drive stick shift.

When you have to ask the kids...... 'exactly who is Biggy and Tupac 'please???

oscar;1108307 wrote: When you have to ask the kids...... 'exactly who is Biggy and Tupac 'please???


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl At least I know who they are.

Old is when your 12 yr old daughter doesn't want to be caught dead with you:yh_rotfl

jimbo;1108310 wrote: old is when you pick your 12 year old daughter from school and you cant tell who is an older pupil and who is a younger parent:rolleyes::rolleyes:


Our government wants to keep 14 year olds on at school until they are 18.

Bloody stupid idea....... Who will pick their kids up from school?? :yh_rotfl

qsducks;1108309 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl At least I know who they are.


Don't mock.......I had to ask the kids the other day.... 'And who exectly is Coolio' please??

oscar;1108320 wrote: Our government wants to keep 14 year olds on at school until they are 18.

Bloody stupid idea....... Who will pick their kids up from school?? :yh_rotfl


Our kids graduate school at 18 but usually they have cars and can drive home themselves or take the trolley.

Or when the kids ask you..... 'Who exactly was Mick Jagger please and is he still alive?'

oscar;1108326 wrote: Or when the kids ask you..... 'Who exactly was Mick Jagger please and is he still alive?'


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl My kids think Eric Clapton is a country singer!:mad:

Old is when



You need your kids to "program" all your new electronic gadgets for you!

cars;1108336 wrote: Old is when



You need your kids to "program" all your new electronic gadgets for you!


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotflso true

qsducks;1108327 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl My kids think Eric Clapton is a country singer!:mad:


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

oscar;1108307 wrote: When you have to ask the kids...... 'exactly who is Biggy and Tupac 'please???yeah... that's the 20's+ generation... I only know about them cause my brother loved them...

qsducks;1108318 wrote: Old is when your 12 yr old daughter doesn't want to be caught dead with you:yh_rotflawww sad.

cars;1108336 wrote: Old is when



You need your kids to "program" all your new electronic gadgets for you! :DMy mom does that!!!

:yh_rotfl

old is when your entire body hurts!:-5:-5:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

I can relate to that Odie,how funny is this thread love it.Old is wen u go all the way down the hallway to get something from the room then u forget wot ur there for.Im getting senior moment a lot bloody frightning and im not a senior yet OMG.lolpmsl.:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl