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A man boarded a plane with 6 kids. After they got

settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to

him and asked, "Are all of those kids yours?"

He replied, "No. I work for a condom company.

These are customer complaints."

I think my sister n law dated this guy a few years ago. :-3

A small zoo in North Carolina obtained a very rare species of

gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very

difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined

the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there

was no male gorilla available. Thinking about their problem, the Zoo

Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker

responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee, like most

rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a

female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a

solution. Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition. Would he be

willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00? Bobby Lee showed some

interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully.

The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but

only under five conditions: "First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna

kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever'

> T-Shirt." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition. "Third",

> he said, "you can't never tell no one about this." The keeper again

> readily agreed to this condition. "Fourth", Bobby Lee said, "I want

> all the children raised Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed.

> "And last," Bobby Lee said, ......... "I'll need another week to come

> up with the $500.00."