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A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle and I can't figure out how to get started.'

Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when it's finished?'

The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.'

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,

'First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.'

He takes her hand and says, 'Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then ..' he said with a deep sigh, . .. . . . . .

'Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.'

Sometimes being a blonde isn't easy, especially if you're cooking...

MONDAY

It's fun to cook for Bob. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

TUESDAY

Bob wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn't dress. What a surprise when Bob brought a friend home for supper.

WEDNESDAY

A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kinda of silly but I took a bath. I can't say it improved the rice any.

THURSDAY

Today Bob asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Which is what led up to Bob asking me why I was rolling around in the garden.

FRIDAY

I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put all ingredients in bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

SATURDAY

Bob did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday (oh boy). For some reason Bob keeps counting to ten.

SUNDAY

Bob's folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast. All I could find was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY

This has been a very exciting week. I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Bob. If we could just get a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with Chocolate Moose.

A blonde joke is that they have more fun.

she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate"

she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK"

she sent me a fax with a stamp on it

they had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade

under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On Phonics"

she tripped over a cordless phone

at the bottom of the application where it says "Sign here" she put "Sagittarius"

it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes

she studied for a blood test-and failed

she thought Boyz II Men was a daycare center

she sold the car for gas money

when she saw the "NC-17" (under 17 not admitted), she went home and got 16 friends

when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved

she thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican Phone Company

when she was going to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left", she turned around and went home.