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Anaheim Mighty Dick superstar, Teemu Selanne, had never had his father see him play professional hockey. He was thrilled to have his father visit him recently to watch him play. In honour of the occasion, his good friend, goalie Mikkail Shtalenkov, arranged a special banquet at the famed local Scandinavian restaurant - Gustav's, where the noted chef, Anders Strandberg, prepared a gourmet dinner of the Selanne's favourite Finnish dishes. In addition to the entire Mighty Ducks team and staff, representatives of the Disney organization and Orange County dignitaries attended, with the entire tab being picked up by the Duck's net-minder. It was a huge success. The Orange County Register reported the next day that it was certainly a dinner worthy of the father, the son and the goalie host.

Two young men were out in the woods on a camping trip when they came upon this great trout brook. They stayed there all day, enjoying the fishing, which was super.

At the end of the day, knowing that they were returning to college and would soon be graduating and going their separate ways, they vowed that they would meet, in twenty years, at the same place, and renew the experience.

Twenty years later, they met and traveled to a spot near where they had been, two decades before. They walked into the now unfamiliar woods and before long came across a brook. One of the men said to the other, "This is the place!"

The other replied, "No, it's not."

The first responded, "Yes, it is. I recognize the clover growing on the bank on the other side of the stream."

To which the other man answered, "Silly, you can't tell a brook by its clover."

It was Hallowe'en and three vampires entered a saloon and walked up to the bar. "What will you have? The bartender asked.

"I'll have a glass of blood," the first replied.

"I'll have a glass of blood, too, please," said the second.

"I'll have a glass of plasma," responded the third.

"Okay, let me get this straight," the bartender said. "That'll be two bloods and a blood light?"

The chief of a poor Native American tribe, living in a desolate location with no paved roads, no electricity, and no indoor plumbing, scrimped and saved and was finally able to send his eldest son to college. The lad did well, working hard for four years and finally graduating with a bachelor's degree in electrical engineering.

Arriving back home after completing his education, the boy was treated to a welcoming party, complete with plenty of refreshments. Shortly after he retired to his bed, the son was awakened by a call of nature. Leaving the hut, he proceeded down the path to the outhouse, only to stumble and fall because of the lack of lights to brighten the way.

The next day, the son decided to put his training to work. He sat down, did the calculations, and prepared construction drawings for a lighting system for the outhouse, complete with illumination for the path leading to it. The project was soon completed and was an immediate success. The chief's son will go down in history as the first Indian to wire a head for a reservation.

You are wayyyyy too funny:wah: Love them....I'm not a good joke teller, but I love to read them.

Anyone know why mice have small balls??





....not many of them know how to dance.:p

erm dunno...can I ask the audience:D

p.s. im sooo used to my threads dying here lol....Im passed caring, as long as I like em and they make me laugh Im happy :wah::wah:

Ok hun.....the tart is back..............what do you want me to do...............AND dont be nasty:rolleyes::p

Carolly;765776 wrote: Ok hun.....the tart is back..............what do you want me to do...............AND dont be nasty:rolleyes::p


you should

1. post a groan

2. groan out loud just for fun

3. Burn all the dollies

4. tell Jimbo off

5. be nice to me

****groan****

I posted another Jimbo:wah:

jimbo;765792 wrote: good for you at least your cheering the place up well done , its tough you cant make every one laugh but its easy to make every one sad :wah:



there have been times i have logged onto fg and the threads have been so gloomy that i have logged straight off again



what i normally do is get out my joke book go through it post all the jokes i find funny and some people will join in others may read and laugh



its a shame soberano left he was a very funny guy ,the place is not the same without him though you are funny





:wah: no really you are :wah:


well horses for courses I say.

Alot of peeps prolly come here for an intellectual chat, not to read through the crap I post but if I manage make one person smile its worth it eh:wah:

Chezzie;765800 wrote: well horses for courses I say.

Alot of peeps prolly come here for an intellectual chat, not to read through the crap I post but if I manage make one person smile its worth it eh:wah:


I think they may stop by for that reason, but we move them along pretty quickly if that's the case!:D

grh;765807 wrote: I think they may stop by for that reason, but we move them along pretty quickly if that's the case!:D


heh heh......rubber neckers:wah::wah:

Chezzie;765811 wrote: heh heh......rubber neckers:wah::wah:


I dont mean u have rubber knickers Grh....:wah::wah::wah:

jimbo;765815 wrote: floppy done a funny :wah::wah:







hey heads up floppy some ahole has been taking the pizz out of you on the that reminds me of you thread :D


I think it was some bald geezer who puts glasses on top of his head to keep his hair out of his eyes :wah:

Chezzie;765779 wrote: you should

1. post a groan

2. groan out loud just for fun

3. Burn all the dollies

4. tell Jimbo off

5. be nice to me
RIGHT HERE GOES.............DEEPPPPPPPPP BREATH

1.POXY PRICE PF PETROL :-5

2.POXY PRICE OF PETROL:p

3.No chance girlfriend:p

4.Oi Winkle...........leave Chezzie Baby alone......................GOT IT PAL!>>>>>>>>>>>told him ok:rolleyes:

5.Well................3 out of 5 aint bad is it flower;)

Carolly;765829 wrote: RIGHT HERE GOES.............DEEPPPPPPPPP BREATH

1.POXY PRICE PF PETROL :-5

2.POXY PRICE OF PETROL:p

3.No chance girlfriend:p

4.Oi Winkle...........leave Chezzie Baby alone......................GOT IT PAL!>>>>>>>>>>>told him ok

5.Well................3 out of 5 aint bad is it flower;)


awwww fanks babe, my special foc'er:-4:wah:

Now what happens.................ere shall we go out on the pull???Its ok.....Ive got black windows in the cars:wah::wah:;)

Si de lorez der bello forté lorez inarro demarnt lorez demarr trux fulof cousan hensan dux !!!!

To be spoken out loud please :sneaky:

G#Gill;765858 wrote: Si de lorez der bello forté lorez inarro demarnt lorez demarr trux fulof cousan hensan dux !!!!

To be spoken out loud please :sneaky:


I said it out loud 3 times and clicked my red shoes , even totos's clueless:D

G#Gill;765858 wrote: Si de lorez der bello forté lorez inarro demarnt lorez demarr trux fulof cousan hensan dux !!!!

To be spoken out loud please :sneaky:


Okay, just for you Chez, seein as how you tried chuck, I'll put it a little clearer, maybe :wah: :rolleyes:

Si de lorez der bello ?

Forté lorez inarro.

Demarnt lorez, demarr trux !

Fulof cousan hensan dux !!!!

Hope you can fathom it a little better now !!!

G#Gill;766400 wrote: Okay, just for you Chez, seein as how you tried chuck, I'll put it a little clearer, maybe :wah: :rolleyes:

Si de lorez der bello ?

Forté lorez inarro.

Demarnt lorez, demarr trux !

Fulof cousan hensan dux !!!!

Hope you can fathom it a little better now !!!


hah hah full of cows and hens and ducks...fab Gill:wah: