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My Dad fell over in the early hours of this morning and had been on the floor for 7 hours as he could'nt get up.

Mum called me at 7.45 am to tell me, I called an ambulance as I did'nt want to move him in case he'd broken any bones.

At the hospital they found that his bood sugar levels were through the roof (he's diabetic)and he had a water infection, they took x rays of his leg and chest, as he's an asthmatic and he sounded like a steam engine.



The doctor told me this evening that his leg is fine, he's fairly certain he's suffered a slight stroke but he was quite concerned that the chest x ray showed a shadow on his lung.

He's sending him for further tests tomorrow on his chest and an angiogram (sp?) to check his heart.



My problem is, I havent told my mum, I think she'll be ok about the slight stroke but I'm afraid she'll go to pieces if I tell her about the shadow.

So, am I doing the right thing?

What if I tell her and it tuns out to be ok?

I'm really beside myself with worry as to if I'm doing the right thing. :-1

I'm really sorry Abbey. Personally, I wouldn't tell her about the shadow. I'd wait and see what the test results are. I hope it turns out to be nothing and he is feeling better fast.

Hi Abbey, That must of been awful for you Dad and your mum, So sorry that hes not too well and in hospital.

Im sorry I dont have any advice, I dont what i'd do am afraid.

Just follow your gut instinct, you know your parents better than us and know whats best deep down babe.

Keep strong and best wishes to you all x:-6

Oh Abbey, I'm so sorry about your Dad. I agree with Peg....I'd wait for more new before worrying Mom more that you have to.

My best wishes are with you and family:-4

So sorry that you're all going through that, Abbs.

I know that if I were you, I would say nothing to my mother as yet. But whatever decision you make, it'll be the right one for you to make, just trust yourself.

Hard one babe..........do whatever your heart tells you.........Thinking of you and your dear parents x

It's not what do you tell your mother, it's what do you tell both of them. Whatever he knows she ought to as well or they'll realize eventually that they've not been in sync. If he knows she needs to as well. If he doesn't then you have a choice of letting her in on it and telling her he doesn't, or keeping them both less worried.

Whatever you decide is just for a few days, the results don't take long to show up and it'd be hard to keep either of them in the dark if the hospital decides it has to explore further. I hope you don't go down that road. You'll find out pretty soon. I'll cross my fingers with you.

I have conflicting advice - sorry. If I was your Mum I would want you to tell me :-4 But if I was you I would thinking like you are right now :-4

Sending you and you family big hugs Abbey. You seem like a wonderful person, who can only of come from wonderful people .... go with your heart Abbey :-4:-4:-4:-4

:-4 n' hugs to you Abbey, follow your gut with whats the best thing to do, and kick the guilt into touch.

Thankyou all for you good advice and kind words. :-4

I shall sleep on it tonight and see what tomorrow brings.

abbey;760767 wrote: Thankyou all for you good advice and kind words. :-4

I shall sleep on it tonight and see what tomorrow brings.


The very best of luck with this.

For what it's worth, a very similar thing happened to my father (without the shadow) when he was seventy eight and he is now fully recovered.

I just saw this Abbey. How upset you must be! But let's stay positive now and see what if anything the tests show. Your dilemma is a hard one. You know your parents best and what's good for them, we only know what we think we'd do if it was our own. If my mom were of sound emotional bent then I would tell her because she'd want to know and I know that but you have to do what your heart says is right for your situation. Sleep on it like you said and see what the morning brings. And know we care about you. :-4

Aw hun beams to you and you dad and mam.

I am with some of the others here, go with yer heart lovey.

Abbey so sorry to hear about your Dad. Sweetie you do what your heart tells you to do. Sleeping on it tonight is a good idea. Waiting for the test results might be a good idea as well. When you find out and your Dad is told I think that is the time to tell you Mum. You will know what is right when the time comes.Hugs and prayers to you and your Dad and Mum..:-4

Your mum recently went through a lot physically herself. A little at a time is prudent. Your instincts are good. Afterall you are your mums best friend, and know what she can handle, The doctors arent sure about everything yet. No need to worry her needlessly. Hugs to you. Your a good daughter.

abbey;760767 wrote: Thankyou all for you good advice and kind words. :-4

I shall sleep on it tonight and see what tomorrow brings.


Why not sleep on it again another night abbs, and then see what the results bring?



Why needlessly worry your mum, as hopefully it turns out to be OK?

One other thing Abbey .....Always remember love that if God brings you to it....he will also see you through it..........x

Love and hugs to you Abbey, hope everything turns out ok.:-4:-4



As for advice - I agree with Spot, Mum needs to know what Dad knows.

There's no good answer for this, dear. :yh_hugs I'm sending you what strength I can. Follow your gut.

Ill be thinking of you.

I am so sorry to hear this Abbey :-1

and i hope he is ok today and you have good news back.

Thinking of you all :-4

Let us know how your father is. I think you do not need to tell your mom the details, just tell her you are taking care of him too. Oh, I am praying for you all, take care.:-4

Once again Thankyou all so much for your kind thoughts :-4



I had a chat with the Dr today and he has booked Dad in for a CT Scan, his bloods came back with abnormalities but he was'nt too worried about that as it could be because of his infection.

Dad looked much better today, I think probably because they had catheterised him, poor bugger was peeing every five minutes.



I sat down with mum this afternoon and told her, I was so afraid that one of the family may tell her and I would rather it came from me.

I am so relieved I did, she said she would have been very hurt finding out later.

My heart aches for them. :-1

Well, it is good you told your mom. Sounds like you are the one closest to her, and she respects your words. Hope your dad and your mom get through this all right together. I will be thinking of all of you. Take care.

You must feel a little better having got that problem off you mind Abbey. I hope it works out for the best possible scenario.:-4:-4

That's good to hear Abbey, good luck:-4

So sorry to hear about your Dad Abbey.

I hope all goes well for all of you:-4:-6

Any news about Dad?

Just to say thinking of you darlin

Abbey, such a worrying time for you all and my thoughts are with you. :-4

Sending warmest wishes to you and your family Abbs

Hope you get some good news soon

Look after yer Mam, glad your not in torment over it anymore :-6

So Sorry to hear about your Dad Abbey my thoughts and love are with you all and I know you will make the right decision:-4

I'm humbled that you thought of me,

Thankyou all so much. :-4



Dad's still in hospital, the catscan came back as inconclusive so they are waiting to have a conference,

All the docs sit around a table and discuss difficult cases and decide what action to take.

Dad had to be catheterised as he could'nt pee, his blood sugar levels are all over the place, one hour they're through the roof, the next they're through the floor and they're giving him lucozade to raise it!

They tried taking the catheter off him but within 12 hours he was back to square one so they had to put it back,

They are going to take it out again tonight and see how he is, if he's ok then they may let him out tomorrow.

My biggest fear is, he'll come home and start rushing to the loo and it all starting over again, I want him home but I want him to be discharged fit and not because they need the bed.

Lots of love and good wished to you and your family Abbey:-4 We're all thinking of you.:-6

I hope they get your Dad up & about soon Abbey.:-4

Can you tell them you don't want him to leave hospital till he is stable enough to go home?:-6

abbey;766487 wrote: I'm humbled that you thought of me,

Thankyou all so much. :-4



Dad's still in hospital, the catscan came back as inconclusive so they are waiting to have a conference,

All the docs sit around a table and discuss difficult cases and decide what action to take.

Dad had to be catheterised as he could'nt pee, his blood sugar levels are all over the place, one hour they're through the roof, the next they're through the floor and they're giving him lucozade to raise it!

They tried taking the catheter off him but within 12 hours he was back to square one so they had to put it back,

They are going to take it out again tonight and see how he is, if he's ok then they may let him out tomorrow.

My biggest fear is, he'll come home and start rushing to the loo and it all starting over again, I want him home but I want him to be discharged fit and not because they need the bed. :(Ive been there darlin...trust me.....what you are going through is one of the hardest things we go through in our lives.I had a terrible relationship with my mother as you may have read on my journal but what she went through broke my heart.She was taken out of her bed at one point because basically they needed her bed even though she was going through hell. Have faith sweetheart and remember that song....You'll Never Walk Alone......because baby you wont be.

Oh abbey, I hope they get your father's blood sugar under control, so when he comes home you will feel so much better about his health. I'm thinking of you.:-4

Im wishing the very best for you father and you Abbey:-4 Dont be satisfied with what the docs tell you until you ARE satisfied;) Ask all the qustions you want, they wont tell you unless you ask.

Abbey, my father experienced very similar symtoms, for no apparent reason. about 10 years ago. He felt dizzy. His blood sugar was through the roof. He even had a convulsion while in the hospital. The doctors couldnt figure it out.

At one point the doctors told my mother, my father was going to die.

Couple of days later.... everything went back to normal, he went home, and they never did come up with an answer. They do have him live like he has diabetes. Monitoring his blood sugar, watching his diet. Hes been fine.

Seems to me, the body can go haywire sometimes. Especially when we get older. I am hoping your dad will be fine. Hang in there.

:yh_hugs Abbey :yh_hugs

Abbey - hugs to you, mum and dad. I hope he's feeling better soon.:-4:-4



Don't forget that the NHS looks after those who kick up a fuss better than those who meekly accept all they're told!!

Imladris;766872 wrote: Abbey - hugs to you, mum and dad. I hope he's feeling better soon.:-4:-4



Don't forget that the NHS looks after those who kick up a fuss better than those who meekly accept all they're told!!


well said!

That's good advice, Abbey. You stay in there and make sure you're satisfied with the job they're doing! (((((Abbey)))))) :-4

Thankyou all. :-4

Dad came home yesterday, he is'nt peeing the same as he was (thank god)

The docs said it was because he was constipated....go figure!

I was more than a little pissed off when they told me he would have to go back in within 2 week for a lung biopsy.

Why on earth could'nt they have done it while he was in hospital? :-5

I am pleased your Dad is better Abbey.

Hope all goes well with the biopsy.:-6

Good luck to you both. :-6:yh_hugs :-6

Sending love and hugs to you Abbey!:-4:-4

Abbey

Getting here late - I'm going thru the same with my in-laws, I'll tell you the in-laws consume alot of our time, falling - Dr's appt. - hospital etc..

As far as the biopsy - it most likely will be handled as out patient, check in and go home the same day. I hope everything comes back good.

I've learned dealing with these 86 yr old in-laws - several times the DR will mention medical conditions to us, and we just keep the info to ourself.

I don't tell the in-law since its a possibillity and its not necessary to worry the other.

At 86 - I'm not sure how much they understand at this point.

Its tough and stressful and I hope your Dad is doing well.

I'll be thinking of you - stay calm - take of yourself & mom

Patsy

:-4:-4 for Abbey and Patsy.