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A life to live

An open book

A soul to steal

For any crook

But dare I hide

Away the key

To finding what's

Inside of me?

Some may browse

And some may shop

Some may glance

And some may stop

But wherein does

My value lie

In my mind or

In their eye?

The light that grows

Inside of me

Cannot be bought

Nor is it free

Someday someone

Will come who knows

What brilliant crystal

In me grows

A nice poem dear koan.

Koan, where do you dream up these lines? You are incredible with words. Don't hit me now! ouch.

Thank you, both. As with anything artistic, it is not really mine. The words are given to me to write. The painting is shown to paint. The hands are guided to sculpt. I just write what I hear.

you know Koan I luv ya...always and forever, i bring out the best in U...Cyalis..we need it...

Coan, the day has come. I know the brilliant crystal that grows in you. Its a priceless gem that's more precious than diamond but probably beyond reach. It can't be bought and yet not for free, could love or words of love be its price?

polycarp wrote: Coan, the day has come. I know the brilliant crystal that grows in you. Its a priceless gem that's more precious than diamond but probably beyond reach. It can't be bought and yet not for free, could love or words of love be its price?


Words of love can often be shallow. Evidence/action of love is the way to finding the crystal (and polishing it) in everyone. I am a sucker for that crystal inside of even the most misguided people. Always looking to help it shine sometimes at great expense.

Words of Love; where is the Cyalis?

Paula wrote: Words of Love; where is the Cyalis?
See what I mean about words of love being shallow?

Hello Coan, I can see your point but I've never really assumed words of love to be shallow cause words mean a lot to me. If that's the case, do romantic poems really make sense or are they really worth the task of writing? I really do not know a better way of expressing love than through verse, should I therefore have a re-think?

I had in mind the specific string of "I love you" words. I come from a home where these words were used often but had very little meaning. I enjoy poems about love or words that show love but the words "I love you" on their own make me roll my eyes. Don't say it, show it. Even worse are the words "I love you, too" It is a trained response and means even less. This is just part of my bitter side.

Koan, you are loved, you just don't realize it.

Hello again, Koan is just being the poet she is. Interestingly many a great poet think that way. I find it hard to understand why those who make many people happy with words find words less appealling. I totally agree with Paula in saying Koan is loved but probabaly doesn't realise it. Koan, you have all it takes to be loved and you're awesome with words. Believe or not cool ladies like you are in short suppy hence need be cherished. Infact you have the attributes of my dream girl and I truly mean that.

Unfortunately for me, I live in a part of the world where words like "i love you" are seldom said and poetry liked by only a few. Maybe that's why I cherish words and people (like you Coan) that are good at putting them together to convey meaningful and nice ideas that make life more colorful and worth living.

polycarp wrote: Hello again, Koan is just being the poet she is. Interestingly many a great poet think that way. I find it hard to understand why those who make many people happy with words find words less appealling. I totally agree with Paula in saying Koan is loved but probabaly doesn't realise it. Koan, you have all it takes to be loved and you're awesome with words. Believe or not cool ladies like you are in short suppy hence need be cherished. Infact you have the attributes of my dream girl and I truly mean that.

Unfortunately for me, I live in a part of the world where words like "i love you" are seldom said and poetry liked by only a few. Maybe that's why I cherish words and people (like you Coan) that are good at putting them together to convey meaningful and nice ideas that make life more colorful and worth living.


:yh_blush

What part of the world doesn't say I love you?

Men in Africa (black Africa) think it is a sign of weakness to say "I love you" to your spouse or kids. Though things are changing (thanks to western civilizaion) but the old order still persists among our folks. For example i 've never heard my father said "I love You" to my mother. Its just not the order here.

Coan, to answer your question, I've copied part of an article i wrote the other day.

Apart from the unmistakable dark complexion, a typical African man can be recognised by his broad nose, thick lips and sometimes thunderous voice. In addition some are blessed (or is it cursed) with large eyes that are permeated with highly inflamed blood vessels which we typically refer to as “red eyes”. While this “red eyes” could be a medical condition that requires urgent attention, to some African men, it is a sign of toughness. May God help us.

Another attribute of the African man is that he is domineering in relationships and always wants to be in charge. Let me explain with a little event that occurred just last week in my Office. I was with a Senior Manager in his office when a Manager entered and sat down. Before I could be the humble surbodinate and say welcome sir, to the Manager that just walked in, the phone rang and the Senior Manager picked it. After talking for about a minute or so, the Senior Manager concluded his telephone conversation with the words “I love you” and hung up. Afterwards the Senior Manager told us that he was talking to his wife. The Manager who all along had been silent, quickly responded and said (to the Senior Manager) “sir, you mean you say I love you to your wife? I can’t do such a thing. How can I say to my wife I love you, impossible”. The Senior Manager smiled and asked him why? And he responded by saying, “I just can’t do it, as it will make her to take me for granted, in fact, it is a sign of weakness”. Upon discovering that the Manager is a typical African man in the true sense of the word, the Senior Manager quickly changed the subject, attended to us and dismissed us. I left the office with mixed feelings, on one hand, I was laughing at the sheer display of African mentality and on the other I was pitying the lady that is married to the Manager. Someone once wrote that “the true measure of a man’s character is the health of his wife”. I wish I could see the wife of this manager to assess how she is coping with him.

That is very interesting to hear that it is a cultural belief in weakness to say one loves. But then, if it is the norm and not expected, do the men still show their love? Or is that asking for trouble too? Do the women say 'I love you' even if they do not hear it back?

Hello again Coan, "showing love" is a relative thing that may vary from one person to another. If however, you mean for an African man to hug his wife after returning home from the office or farm, or to pet her like a baby and whisper sweet nothings into her ear, or call her regularly when he is not in town, then am sorry to say our men are poor at such. Don't get me wrong as it is not everone that acts that way because the educated ones behave like you do in the western world but for the average African man you meet on the street, "showing love" is not in his list daily activities. Marriage (which is generally polygamous) is basically a necessary arrangement people go into to have kids and not basically the result of love between a man and a woman. But as I said earlier, things are changing and many of us (the educated ones) are imbibing and living your western way of life.

How do you think this got started? Does it stem from the all women are evil, Adam and Eve mythology or do the women excercise control in manipulative ways that was widespread enough to cause this fear? Why is manliness so equated with control over women?

BTW I googled polycarp. Was wondering why you identify with this saint?

Well Coan, this is a very difficult question but I'll try to give my interpretation of the general facts (which do not necessarily represent my personal opinion) with the hope that it will not cause any ruffling of feathers. There are two sides to this issue that you raised, one is the religious perspective which teaches us that woman was created from man's rib and to be man's companion, which makes her a special creature to be loved by the man. Based on these, I am sorry to say that man is in a way meant to be in charge.

The other is the secular/philosophical perspective which explains that the man is a rational being while the woman is an emotional being. The rational being is generally supposed to be in charge as rationality is always superior to emotion. When driven by emotion, decisions taken that are soon regretted unlike when the rational box is used in the decision making process.

He he he Polycarp is actually my name as given to me by my dad. I don't know how my dad came across the name considering the fact that we are not catholics. I kinda like it though.

How about Coan, whats the story behind the name (or username)?

That's great. A very interesting name indeed.

A friend told me I was like a living Zen koan (with a K not C) and I liked the reference:

It is a reference to examples that are meant to guide life; or in the case of Zen, these dictates are meant to be catalysts for awakening one's true/deep/pure nature. They often recount an encounter between master and disciple, where the master's response or question is said to reveal the deep nature of things as they are.

Coan wrote "A friend told me I was like a living Zen koan (with a K not C) and I liked the reference:"

That's equally an interesting name but what are those attributes of a Zen Koan that made your friend say you are living like one?. Not writing poetry I guess.

Reread the description. I am a catalyst and tend to say things that reveal deeper meaning

Well in that I case I can agree no less with your friend. Come to think of it are Buddhist or have your read their books? There seem to be some connection here.