Religion in the wilderness
Posted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 1:07 pm
A Priest, a Pentecostal Preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains to the
students of the University of Georgia in Athens. They would get together
two or three times a week at the Varsity for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that
hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to
another and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into
the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it. Seven days
later, they're all together to discuss the "experience."
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has various bandages went first and said, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts, and in an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he
claimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He
was in a total body cast with IV's and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape. Rabbi Lipschitz looked up and said, "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start things out."
students of the University of Georgia in Athens. They would get together
two or three times a week at the Varsity for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that
hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to
another and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into
the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it. Seven days
later, they're all together to discuss the "experience."
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has various bandages went first and said, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts, and in an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he
claimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He
was in a total body cast with IV's and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape. Rabbi Lipschitz looked up and said, "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start things out."