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It has been known for many years that sex is good exercise, but until recently nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities. Now after original and proprietary research they are proud to present the results.



REMOVING HER CLOTHES:

With her consent....................... 12 Calories

Without her consent..................187 Calories



OPENING HER BRA:

With both hands........................ 8 Calories

With one hand..........................12 Calories

With your teeth........................ 85 Calories



PUTTING ON A CONDOM:

With an erection....................... 6 Calories

Without an erection................315 Calories



PRELIMINARIES:

Trying to find the clitoris............ 8 Calories

Trying to find the G-Spot...........92 Calories



POSITIONS:

Missionary............................. 12 Calories

69 lying down......................... 78 Calories

69 standing up.......................112 Calories

Wheelbarrow..........................216 Calories

Doggy Style...........................326 Calories

Italian chandelier....................912 Calories



ORGASMING:

Real................................... 112 Calories

False.................................. 315 Calories



POST ORGASM:

Lying in bed hugging................... 18 Calories

Getting up immediately............... 36 Calories

Explaining why you got out of bed immediately......816 Calories



GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: IF YOU ARE:

20-29 years old....................... 36 Calories

30-39 years............................ 80 Calories

40-49 years............................124 Calories

50-59 years............................972 Calories

60-69 years.........................2,916 Calories

70 and over......................... Results are still pending



DRESSING AFTERWARDS:

Calmly................................. 32 Calories

In a hurry............................. 98 Calories

With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories

With your wife knocking at the door.... 3,521 Calories

My thoughts:



GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: IF YOU ARE:

50-59 years............................972 Calories



SHEEEEESH no wonder I lost 20# since I met NV...........

BTS wrote: My thoughts:



GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: IF YOU ARE:

50-59 years............................972 Calories



SHEEEEESH no wonder I lost 20# since I met NV...........


I am red faced embarassed right now............and yet --- very proud.:sneaky:

I know that's going to offend a whole SLEW of people but.....that was damn funny!!!! :yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl

nvalleyvee wrote: ...........and yet --- very proud.:sneaky:


MEEEEEE TOOOOOOO

nvalleyvee wrote: I am red faced embarassed right now............and yet --- very proud.:sneaky:


FLOP ............ WHERE ARE YOU WHEN I NEED YOUR SUPPORT?

BabyRider wrote: I know that's going to offend a whole SLEW of people but.....that was damn funny!!!! :yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl


I call it "SEXRECISE"

BabyRider wrote: I know that's going to offend a whole SLEW of people but.....that was damn funny!!!! :yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl


I can never stay mad at him...............Bwaaahahaha

BTS pulls NV from her puter screen and lays a BIG wtt one on her hot lips...........

BTS wrote: I call it "SEXRECISE"


Hunny - the next thing is every guy asking you for advice..............

BTS wrote: BTS pulls NV from her puter screen and lays a BIG wtt one on her hot lips...........


See I can do it and u can't...............

HAAAA HAAAAA

nvalleyvee wrote: Hunny - the next thing is every guy asking you for advice..............


I would refer them ALL to you.......... For who Knows better how their partner is.........for I have no idea!!!!!!

SnoozeControl wrote: I'm having a problem imagining a standing 69. Could you please include a photo? Purely for educational purposes, of course.


UMMM ERRRRR --- there was no standing involved............

nvalleyvee wrote: UMMM ERRRRR --- there was no standing involved............


Well ummmmmmmm it started standing.........

BTS wrote: Well ummmmmmmm it started standing.........


FG says TMFI!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :driving:

nvalleyvee wrote: I am red faced embarassed right now............and yet --- very proud.:sneaky:


As u should be..............:yh_nailbi

BTS wrote: As u should be..............:yh_nailbi


OK.........OK.......OK............. this hs become BTS's and NV's private love each other thread ,,,,,, fast reducing to our foreplay thread............

Thanks everyone for staying out of it....

ArnoldLayne wrote: Well I have looked in now and again


Peeping Tom...........:-2 :wah: :wah:

ArnoldLayne wrote: Ah, I didnt look......promise


Yea - I believe that one.........Duh..............

_________________________________

nvalleyvee wrote: OK.........OK.......OK............. this hs become BTS's and NV's private love each other thread ,,,,,, fast reducing to our foreplay thread............



Thanks everyone for staying out of it....:oactually it became rather nauseating. :yh_sick

nvalleyvee wrote: OK.........OK.......OK............. this hs become BTS's and NV's private love each other thread ,,,,,, fast reducing to our foreplay thread............

Thanks everyone for staying out of it....


What was the original point of this thread ????? still

Bez wrote: What was the original point of this thread ????? still


In one of the most credible studies correlating overall health with sexual frequency, Queens University in Belfast tracked the mortality of about 1,000 middle-aged men over the course of a decade. The study was designed to compare persons of comparable circumstances, age and health. Its findings, published in 1997 in the British Medical Journal, were that men who reported the highest frequency of orgasm enjoyed a death rate half that of the laggards. Other studies (some rigorous, some less so) purport to show that having sex even a few times a week has an associative or causal relationship with the following:

- Improved sense of smell: After sex, production of the hormone prolactin surges. This in turn causes stem cells in the brain to develop new neurons in the brain's olfactory bulb, its smell center.

- Reduced risk of heart disease: In a 2001 follow-on to the Queens University study mentioned above, researchers focused on cardiovascular health. Their finding? That by having sex three or more times a week, men reduced their risk of heart attack or stroke by half. In reporting these results, the co-author of the study, Shah Ebrahim, Ph.D., displayed the well-loved British gift for understatement: "The relationship found between frequency of sexual intercourse and mortality is of considerable public interest."

- Weight loss, overall fitness: Sex, if nothing else, is exercise. A vigorous bout burns some 200 calories--about the same as running 15 minutes on a treadmill or playing a spirited game of squash. The pulse rate, in a person aroused, rises from about 70 beats per minute to 150, the same as that of an athlete putting forth maximum effort. British researchers have determined that the equivalent of six Big Macs can be worked off by having sex three times a week for a year. Muscular contractions during intercourse work the pelvis, thighs, buttocks, arms, neck and thorax. Sex also boosts production of testosterone, which leads to stronger bones and muscles. Men's Health magazine has gone so far as to call the bed the single greatest piece of exercise equipment ever invented.

- Reduced depression: Such was the implication of a 2002 study of 293 women. American psychologist Gordon Gallup reported that sexually active participants whose male partners did not use condoms were less subject to depression than those whose partners did. One theory of causality: Prostoglandin, a hormone found only in semen, may be absorbed in the female genital tract, thus modulating female hormones.

- Pain-relief: Immediately before orgasm, levels of the hormone oxytocin surge to five times their normal level. This in turn releases endorphins, which alleviate the pain of everything from headache to arthritis to even migraine. In women, sex also prompts production of estrogen, which can reduce the pain of PMS.

- Less-frequent colds and flu: Wilkes University in Pennsylvania says individuals who have sex once or twice a week show 30% higher levels of an antibody called immunoglobulin A, which is known to boost the immune system.

- Better bladder control: Heard of Kegel exercises? You do them, whether you know it or not, every time you stem your flow of urine. The same set of muscles is worked during sex.

- Better teeth: Seminal plasma contains zinc, calcium and other minerals shown to retard tooth decay. Since this is a family Web site, we will omit discussion of the mineral delivery system. Suffice it to say that it could be a far richer, more complex and more satisfying experience than squeezing a tube of Crest--even Tartar Control Crest. Researchers have noted, parenthetically, that sexual etiquette usually demands the brushing of one's teeth before and/or after intimacy, which, by itself, would help promote better oral hygiene.

- A happier prostate? Some urologists believe they see a relationship between infrequency of ejaculation and cancer of the prostate. The causal argument goes like this: To produce seminal fluid, the prostate and the seminal vesicles take such substances from the blood as zinc, citric acid and potassium, then concentrate them up to 600 times. Any carcinogens present in the blood likewise would be concentrated. Rather than have concentrated carcinogens hanging around causing trouble, it's better to evict them. Regular old sex could do the job. But if the flushing of the prostate were your only objective, masturbation might be a better way to go, especially for the non-monogamous male. Having sex with multiple partners can, all by itself, raise a man's risk of cancer by up to 40%. That's because he runs an increased risk of contracting sexual infections. So, if you want the all the purported benefits of flushing with none of the attendant risk, go digital. A study recently published by the British Journal of Urology International asserts that men in their 20s can reduce by a third their chance of getting prostate cancer by ejaculating more than five times a week.

So what you're saying is, the more sex you have, you are less likely to suffer from these things?

That accounts for me being depressed about being so fat i cant get out of this chair i'm wedged in

to go to change my knickers!,

but no sweat, cant smell them cos my sense of smell went long ago,

which is a good thing really cos i'm off to the dentist tomorrow to have all my teeth pulled and i wont be able to smell the ether.

Just hope my dodgy ticker stands up to it! :wah: :wah:

abbey wrote: So what you're saying is, the more sex you have, you are less likely to suffer from these things?

:wah: :wah:
Yippers