ForumGarden

chonsigirl wrote: I had a student just tell me this in class..............



"If my daddy marries my mommy, she would be my step-sister...."
Oh, many, many years ago

When I was twenty-three

I was married to a widow

Who was pretty as can be

This widow had a grown-up daughter

Who had hair of red

My father fell in love with her

And soon the two were wed



This made my dad my son-in-law

And changed my very life

For my daughter was my mother

'Cause she was my father's wife

To complicate the matter

Though it really brought me joy

I soon became the father

Of a bouncing baby boy



This little baby then became

A brother-in-law to Dad

And so became my uncle

Though it made me very sad

For if he was my uncle

Then that also made him brother

Of the widow's grown-up daughter

WHo of course is my step-mother



Chorus

I'm my own grandpa

I'm my own grandpa

It sounds funny I know

But it really is so

Oh, I'm my own grandpa



My father's wife then had a son

Who kept them on the run

And he became my grandchild

For he was my daughter's son

My wife is now my mother's mother

And it makes me blue

Because although she is my wife

She's my grandmother too



Now if my wife is my grandmother

Then I'm her grandchild

And every time I think of it

It nearly drives me wild

For now I have become

The strangest case you ever saw

As husband of my grandma

I am my own grandpa

:wah: AC has it! The perfect song!

Pinky wrote: Anyway, I thought you were going to come back and make me go to bed Mister? So much for that. Harumph.
hehehe. yeah, i fell asleep. sorry.

Pinky wrote: Aw, what a cutie Snooze!
Here an old song I liked

Bill Jackson was a poor old dub,

Who joined the Darktown Poker Club

But cursed the day he told them he would join.

His money used to go like it had wings

If he held Queens, someone had Kings

And each night he would contribute all his coins.

He said I'm going to play em tight tonight

No bobtail flush is gonna make me bite

When I get's in, my hands going to be a peach.

So he played em tight, but lost his pile

And Bill got peevish after a while

So he rose, got up, and made this speech.



He said - Now you all see this brand new razor

I've had it sharpened just today

And I'm comin''- in with my own rules

That you must follow as you play.

Now keep them boney hands on the table when you deal'em please

And don't be slipp'en any aces down there in between your knees.

And don't make any of them funny signs like your trying to tip off your hand

Just talk in American, boy American - so's I can understand.

And don't be dealing off the bottom, cause Oh! that's rough

Just take Five, Five - then stop, that's enough.

Now when you bet, put up them chips, cause I don't like it when you shy.

If you get busted - go get some, cause I won't be here by & by.

Pass them cards for me to shuffle every time before you deal

Then if anything wrong, I must see.

Cause you ain't going to play this game according to Mr. Hoyle,

You're going to play this here game according to me.









Now sitting right there at that there clan

There chanced to be a one eyed man

And Bill kept watching from the corner of his eye.

If ol' one-eye would deal'em then

It would have cost that Bill another five or ten.

So he rose, looked all around and with a sigh,

He said 'Lord' he said - but it's an awful shame,

But there's someone cheating in this here game

Of course it don't do for me to name the guy.

So I'll refrain from mentioning the party's name

But if I catch him cheating just once again

I'm gonna take my fist and close that other eye.



Now you all see this brand new razor

Well I've had it sharpened just today

I'm comin' in with my own rules

That you must follow when you play. - Egad

Keep your hands up there when you deal'em please

And don't be puttin' those wildies slip in between your knees.

And don't make them funny signs like your trying to tip off your hand

Just talk American - Big A-A-A so's I can understand.

And don't be takin' off the bottom, cause I've told you before - that's rough!

This is the Army game, Five, Five - then halt, that's enough.

When you bet, let's see them Reds and Blues, cause I don't like it when you shy.

If you run out of gas - go get pumped up, I won't be here by & by.

Pass them pasteboards for me to shuffle every time before you deal - let me ripple.

Anything's wrong, I wanna see.

I mean you ain't gonna play this game now according to Mr. Hoyle,

You're going to play this game according to me.

Henry, if you break the seal on them new set of Bicycles - we'll go on from here....Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.

Teachers have today off in Maryland..........................

It is raining today...again.

We have the wind right now below you, Marie-gust of about 45 mph. I can imagine the leaves in the yard now..........................

I'm stuffed!

sunny104 wrote: I'm stuffed!


ummm...What did the turkey say on Thanksgiving morning?

I ate too much!

usually I just have soup for lunch.

Are we having fun yet???

Pinky wrote: I am! I'm onto my fifth glass of wine and I'm slightly squiffy:-6


Only slightly, Pinkster? Let's get a move on, girlfriend!!

I'm waiting for beer time!

sunny104 wrote: I'm waiting for beer time!


Yup Me too:)

Goodnight then

Good night Birdie....................

Sleep well my friend :-6

Pinky wrote: WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! I'm totally plonkered and having a great time!

Got all the rock faves on youtube and air-guitaring to myself, haha!


YEAH Pinky!

Enjoy yourself, babe :guitarist

"you only get one chance at Life. If you work it out right, one chance is all you need." --- Joe Louis, former Heavyweight Champ.

does any one else get up turn on the pc



go to todays posts



think oooh thats interesting i'll post on that



then scroll down post on a few things then go back to todays posts and realise you have hogged the top 7 places and think uh oh i'd better not post for a while





thats what i just did ....... of course now this one will straight to the top also



come on people post some thing any thing

jimbo wrote: does any one else get up turn on the pc



go to todays posts



think oooh thats interesting i'll post on that



then scroll down post on a few things then go back to todays posts and realise you have hogged the top 7 places and think uh oh i'd better not post for a while





thats what i just did ....... of course now this one will straight to the top also



come on people post some thing any thing :oNo! You're evidence of hogging will stay on display for all to see. You will hang your head in shame because of your gluttony. No will post anything.











..............:-2





















...................................................... :yh_doh DOH!

Accountable wrote: No! You're evidence of hogging will stay on display for all to see. You will hang your head in shame because of your gluttony. No will post anything.











..............:-2





















...................................................... :yh_doh DOH!






thanks buddy you saved me .......uh oh ......doh :-5

Hog away jimbo...................

I guess I do it alot too, but I don't see it that way. Slow traffic time, you will usually post more.

jimbo wrote: thanks buddy you saved me .......uh oh ......doh :-5*points* HA HA!







AAArrrrghhh!

I trimmed part of the rose bush, a whole bag of cuttings. My fingers got poked too many times.......................

Such a lovely bush, 2 stories tall! But it takes me weeks to cut it back..................

chonsigirl wrote: I trimmed part of the rose bush, a whole bag of cuttings. My fingers got poked too many times.......................



Such a lovely bush, 2 stories tall! But it takes me weeks to cut it back..................


there is a joke there some where but i love her too much to say it :-4

jimbo wrote: does any one else get up turn on the pc



go to todays posts



think oooh thats interesting i'll post on that



then scroll down post on a few things then go back to todays posts and realise you have hogged the top 7 places and think uh oh i'd better not post for a while





thats what i just did ....... of course now this one will straight to the top also



come on people post some thing any thing
Now listen gals

dont get me wrong

but I was asked

to sing a song

and when I asked

what shall I sing

you said "Oh Hell sing anything"


Here is that grandpa song

http://politicalhumor.about.com/gi/dyna ... FHome.aspx

Anything goes here ... but does anything go here?

How deep does the deed on my property go? Do I own it all the way to the center of the earth? If so, does it taper as it gets to the core?