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Uncle Kram wrote: I went out on Monday night with a friend for a drink. I asked for 2 bottles of beer. The young chap behind the bar said "Do you need glasses?"

I said "No, I might be 46 but I can still see the bottles".

You know I'm not making this up don't you?

The next night I was in my local chip shop and had to stand at the front of the queue for ages while the chips cooked. As the girl behind the counter handed the chips over she apologised by saying "Sorry about the wait"

I said " Don't worry, it's ok - I don't mind how heavy they are"

It's an illness isn't it? :-3


Ho Ho Ho Young Elfling, you made Santa chuckle! :wah:

Expect to find some candy in your Christmas stocking.

There you go Krammy, you make me and Santa laugh!

Lucky man you, you get candy in your stocking this year.

ArnoldLayne wrote: Does Uncle Kram wear stockings ?

Would you believe it


Only when I'm doing a bank job :sneaky: :

Okie wrote: Hey Uncle Kram, if one drink makes a gal half tight, what does two drinks do?
I give up Okie

Pinky wrote: Did you hear about the woman in hospital after having phone sex?

When they investigated, they found a nokia, a motorola and an ericcson, but no sieman




I have kind of a blank stare on my face:rolleyes:

Uncle Kram wrote: I give up Okie
It makes her whole tight.

Pinky wrote: Did you hear about the woman in hospital after having phone sex?

When they investigated, they found a nokia, a motorola and an ericcson, but no sieman
that's F-ing wrong. but funny.

Well Okie and Pinky - you have given me some deep thoughts to carry with me onto the thin ice of this new day.... :sneaky:

SnoozeControl wrote: Okay, I went shopping online and found a Kinky t-shirt I liked (the one you bought says it's form fitting, and no one wants to see me in something like that, believe me) and I got it in X-large so I can wear it as a nightie. Now I can say I slept with Kinky. :p
Maybe I should get one that says Pinky then ....

I ache, all over

sunny104 wrote: I got me a Kinky T-shirt! :-6 :-4 :DI saw a bumper sticker yesterday:



Kinky for Governor

Why the Hell Not!!

weber wrote: It's pastrami and the other thing you said. That's what came up. C'mere:-4


Oh...

The reason I ask is because when you had posted the picture and all that was shown was the address, it had the word horse in it, and I was expecting to see a picture of a horse.

Then I had seen the picture, after you edited it or whatever you did to make it work, and seen it was food and I rather got a little paranoid....thinking it was horse.

When I used to live in downtown Dayton, there was this store down the street that we usually went to for grocories, and during this time we had seen reported on the news that very same store was shut down because they had been busted by the FDA (or whatever is in charge of that sort of thing) for selling horse meat! :yh_sick

Horse is good eatin'. :-2

Hamster wrote: Why Betty?




Must have the lurgi, everyone else has had it, now it's my turn.

An urgi would be funner...................

Betty Boop wrote: Must have the lurgi, everyone else has had it, now it's my turn.
Not nice, boops. A glass of hot water with a slice of lemon, a spoon of honey and an inch of whisky. Does you the world of good. Take as required.

spot wrote: Not nice, boops. A glass of hot water with a slice of lemon, a spoon of honey and an inch of whisky. Does you the world of good. Take as required.


Will do, as soon as I've been to work though! The only day I work and I come down with this, marvellous :rolleyes:

SnoozeControl wrote: What's a lurgi? :-2You're not old enough, Snooze.The dreaded lurgi struck Britain fifty years ago, on 9th November 1954, in The Goon Show. This anarchic and surreal radio comedy series starred Peter Sellers, Spike Milligan and Harry Secombe; it was written by Spike Milligan, between bouts of depression, though on this occasion Eric Sykes (who shared an office with him at the time) did most of the work.

The plot, such as it was, dealt with an outbreak of a previously unknown disease. It was solemnly announced in the House of Commons that “Lurgi is the most dreadful malady known to mankind. In six weeks it could swamp the whole of the British Isles. Of course, there was no epidemic—it was a fraud perpetrated by those arch-criminals, Count Jim “Thighs Moriarty and the Honourable Hercules Grytpype-Thynne (trading as Messrs Goosey and Bawkes, a barely-disguised reference to the music publisher Boosey and Hawkes) who put it about that nobody who played a brass-band instrument had ever been known to catch lurgi; this resulted in their disposing profitably of vast amounts of merchandise.

The Goons were then highly popular and the episode resulted in the phrase “the dreaded lurgi becoming a school playground term for some horrid infection you had supposedly contracted, especially one you had as a result of being dirty or smelly or just not like the other kids. It has survived to the present day, not only among my generation, but as a slang term in schools across Britain among children who have no idea where it comes from. The disease is also known in Australia and New Zealand, but all Americans seem to be inoculated against it at birth, since it’s virtually unknown to them (but then, they have cooties instead).http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-dre1.htm

It's a cool and rainy Friday morning here in Boston. But it's almost the weekend

I'm going out to dinner Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday night.

I lost about 15 pounds over the past few months.

How the hell am I *ever* gonna keep it off with all this EATING? :-2

SnoozeControl wrote: Yeah, and with the holidays coming up... that's always the toughest time of year not to overindulge in the goodies.


Snooze

Where and with whom do you spend Christmas?



I promise not to crash your family party! :p

cherandbuster wrote: It's a cool and rainy Friday morning here in Boston. But it's almost the weekend

I'm going out to dinner Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday night.

I lost about 15 pounds over the past few months.

How the hell am I *ever* gonna keep it off with all this EATING? :-2


Good Lord Cher you don't look like you need to lose any, go ahead and eat girl:D

cherandbuster wrote: Snooze

Where and with whom do you spend Christmas?



I promise not to crash your family party! :p


snooze will be in my christmas stocking along with you cher..didn't you read the hohoho thread

zinkyusa wrote: Good Lord Cher you don't look like you need to lose any, go ahead and eat girl:D


Zinkster

I've always struggled with my weight, sometimes going up and down 30 pounds or so. It's been a real struggle for me for most of my adult life.

Of course, the twin sister *never* has this problem. Just another knock on my self-esteem.

Right now, I am about the weight in my avatar -- 125 pounds. I'd like to lose a few more, but I'm pretty content now.

It's too bad that so many woman tie there self-esteem to their weight.

My hubby, (who is obviously not a woman ), is about 30 pounds overweight and it's really starting to bother him. I guess when it bothers him enough, he'll try to make some changes.

But Zinkster, I thank you for your lovely compliment :-6

cherandbuster wrote: Zinkster

I've always struggled with my weight, sometimes going up and down 30 pounds or so. It's been a real struggle for me for most of my adult life.

Of course, the twin sister *never* has this problem. Just another knock on my self-esteem.

Right now, I am about the weight in my avatar -- 125 pounds. I'd like to lose a few more, but I'm pretty content now.

It's too bad that so many woman tie there self-esteem to their weight.

My hubby, (who is obviously not a woman ), is about 30 pounds overweight and it's really starting to bother him. I guess when it bothers him enough, he'll try to make some changes.

But Zinkster, I thank you for your lovely compliment :-6


Well our society is really messed up in the way women are constantly bombarded with the message that they have to be thin and perfectly proportioned to be attractive..Since men get the same messages we become primadonna's at least while we are young. As people age hopefully they mature and attractiveness begins to mean more than the physical shell. The important thing is be at a weight where you just "feel" good, and don't get sick often (wherever that settles out).. I don't even weigh myself anymore. I just try to eat sensibly and slowly, stop when I get full, exercise some and get lots of sex (er ah, did I type that out loud)..

:-4 Zinkster :-4

SnoozeControl wrote: I'm all alone in the world, Cher. I occasionally get invited to join a co-worker during the holidays, but I feel like I'm intruding. Wah, poor me.:rolleyes:


I know you don't want any sympathy Snooze

But that *really* bums me out :-1

I wish I could spend the holidays with you

I just know we would laugh our way through the entire day :-4

SnoozeControl wrote: It's all a matter of choice, buddy. I could still be married or remarried, but I prefer to spend a little alone time at this point in my life. If I wasn't so lazy, I could spend my holidays working at a food line in a homeless shelter or donating my time in some other capacity. Things aren't that bad.


I hear you, babe

Uncle Kram wrote: I went out on Monday night with a friend for a drink. I asked for 2 bottles of beer. The young chap behind the bar said "Do you need glasses?"

I said "No, I might be 46 but I can still see the bottles".

You know I'm not making this up don't you?

The next night I was in my local chip shop and had to stand at the front of the queue for ages while the chips cooked. As the girl behind the counter handed the chips over she apologised by saying "Sorry about the wait"

I said " Don't worry, it's ok - I don't mind how heavy they are"

It's an illness isn't it? :-3


it must be an age thing i do that all the time and the less funny people find it the more i do it i'm like victor meldrew in reverse :wah:

We lost a fold Wednesday night. The filly’s umbilical cord was wrapped around the mare’s pelvis and was pinched, which cut off the baby’s oxygen. It died. It was a gorgeous Appaloosa filly. I had planned on sending pictures.

cherandbuster wrote:

Of course, the twin sister *never* has this problem. Just another knock on my self-esteem.




That's your perception...

I think you're gorgeous, and that smile is enough to hypnotize the most savage of beasts.

K.Snyder wrote: That's your perception...

I think you're gorgeous, and that smile is enough to hypnotize the most savage of beasts.


yeah i second that emotion..:wah:

jbbarker1947 wrote: We lost a fold Wednesday night. The filly’s umbilical cord was wrapped around the mare’s pelvis and was pinched, which cut off the baby’s oxygen. It died. It was a gorgeous Appaloosa filly. I had planned on sending pictures.


I'm sorry to hear that Barker....I grew up around race horses, and I always respected them as an animal.

I always got nervous when I walked behind them though....some of those horses in the barn waited in anxiety to boot you across the barn.

K.Snyder wrote: That's your perception...

I think you're gorgeous, and that smile is enough to hypnotize the most savage of beasts.


Why K! :-4

That is such a lovely thing to say

You made my Friday :-6

And thank you as well, Zinkmeister