oh good, i just set my house on fire

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Mon May 16, 2005 11:06 pm

i am sitting here minding my own business and reading FG. i have a fag burning in the ashtray next to me. all of a sudden i hear an explosion, the ashtray is in a hundred pieces and there are burning embers in the carpet and on my coffee table runner. it is a conflagration!

so i run and get water to douse it all, pick up all the glass and butts. i want to know WHY i am so hapless?? damn cruisers always wrecking themselves... also. i am suing the ashtray company, there is a fire prevention clause inherent and implicit in selling an item for burning fags! to hell with tort reform! nevermind dissected fingers! rally against ashtray companies! .... FG unite!!

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Mon May 16, 2005 11:18 pm

lady cop wrote: i am sitting here minding my own business and reading FG. i have a fag burning in the ashtray next to me. all of a sudden i hear an explosion, the ashtray is in a hundred pieces and there are burning embers in the carpet and on my coffee table runner. it is a conflagration!

so i run and get water to douse it all, pick up all the glass and butts. i want to know WHY i am so hapless?? damn cruisers always wrecking themselves... also. i am suing the ashtray company, there is a fire prevention clause inherent and implicit in selling an item for burning fags! to hell with tort reform! nevermind dissected fingers! rally against ashtray companies! unite!! Mmmm

you know that i'm not a believer in the great almighty, but i think someone or something is telling you to put yer ciggie out & GO TO BLOODY BED!

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Mon May 16, 2005 11:24 pm

abbey wrote: Mmmm

you know that i'm not a believer in the great almighty, but i think someone or something is telling you to put yer ciggie out & GO TO BLOODY BED!yes m'am. LC goes away quietly. .....when Abbey speaks, that's it~ beddy byes now. xoxoxox

persephone · Post by **persephone** » Tue May 17, 2005 3:28 am

I thought things like this only happened to me :wah:

Bothwell · Post by **Bothwell** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:06 am

Glad to see that prior to visiting your Neurosurgeon you stayed up too late having a cigarette

(I am now diving for cover)

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:09 am

Bothwell wrote: Glad to see that prior to visiting your Neurosurgeon you stayed up too late having a cigarette

(I am now diving for cover)at least i didn't have to call out the fire-rescue guys again, you know how they like cutting my clothes off!! :p

Bothwell · Post by **Bothwell** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:15 am

at least i didn't have to call out the fire-rescue guys again, you know how they like cutting my clothes off!!

Yes I meant to speak to you about that, are you supposed to call them EVERY friday?

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:22 am

Bothwell wrote: Yes I meant to speak to you about that, are you supposed to call them EVERY friday?

:yh_rotfl :yh_love :yh_laugh

Agnes · Post by **Agnes** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:59 am

abbey wrote: Mmmm

you know that i'm not a believer in the great almighty, but i think someone or something is telling you to put yer ciggie out & GO TO BLOODY BED!

abbey, is coming from england to take care fo you. :wah:

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Tue May 17, 2005 6:12 am

Agnes wrote: abbey, is coming from england to take care fo you. :wah: Lady Cop bolts the doors, batons down the hatches & dives behind the couch trembling! :wah:

mominiowa · Post by **mominiowa** » Tue May 17, 2005 7:52 am

I have had my laugh for the day................ :wah: :yh_laugh :yh_rotfl

john8pies · Post by **john8pies** » Tue May 17, 2005 8:00 am

Sorry to hear about your fire. It might be an incentive to try giving up smoking though

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Tue May 17, 2005 12:34 pm

Ah, you finally got my trick ashtray! I was wondering when it would get there! :yh_bigsmi

Post by **kensloft** » Tue May 17, 2005 3:17 pm

lady cop wrote: i am sitting here minding my own business and reading FG. i have a fag burning in the ashtray next to me. all of a sudden i hear an explosion, the ashtray is in a hundred pieces and there are burning embers in the carpet and on my coffee table runner. it is a conflagration!

so i run and get water to douse it all, pick up all the glass and butts. i want to know WHY i am so hapless?? damn cruisers always wrecking themselves... also. i am suing the ashtray company, there is a fire prevention clause inherent and implicit in selling an item for burning fags! to hell with tort reform! nevermind dissected fingers! rally against ashtray companies! .... FG unite!!
You should buy the self-suffocating ashtrays.

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Tue May 17, 2005 7:38 pm

Get one of them huge ash tray with water in the bottom, and a fire extinguisher and keep it by the ash tray.. :-2 and empty it once in a while.

koan · Post by **koan** » Tue May 17, 2005 10:04 pm

Only leads to trouble.

(IMO second hand smokers ought to pay for half)