I Killed a Cow ... Or One Man's Meat ...

[jones jones]

During the late 1980's I was assigned to cover a story in Port Alfred South Africa, which is about an hour and a half's drive from Port Elizabeth or as it is known today, Nelson Mandela Bay where I am based.

On my way home at about 2am on a Sunday morning, I had just passed through the sleepy seaside resort of Kenton on Sea and had cranked my BMW up to 140kph or about 85 or 86 mph. when I rounded a bend. Directly in front of me a herd of cattle were crossing the road.

Strange how you are able to react in a split second, but I did. I jerked the steering wheel to the left, hoping to maybe pass by the last cow. No such luck. I hit one full on, but luckily more to the left side of the car. Just before the headlights went out, I had a brief glimpse of the animal’s head against the windscreen and them … BLAM!

I was off the tarred road on the gravel shoulder fighting to keep the car in a straight line.

I stopped the car in what here is called a “cutting” which is a section where the road cuts thru a hillside and the sides are quite steep. When I managed to stop I was obviously in a state of shock, because I jumped out and, believing I had gone down the side of the hill, began running up! When I reached the top I looked down and saw the tarred road below me and the BMW. I scrambled down the side of the slope and stood beside the car.

Because it was a time of “troubles” in South Africa, there were not many cars on the road at that time of the morning and so the few that passed never bothered to stop. After a while when I had got my breath back, I looked up and the sight that met my eyes on the summit of the cutting chilled my body to the bone.

You must have watched a cowboy movie where at one time or another Indians suddenly appear on the crest of a hill, sitting on their ponies and armed to the teeth. Well, this was very similar only it wasn’t a movie. Lined up above me were about eight or ten blacks with axes, machetes and god knows what else in their hands.

I figured this was it. They would rush down the side of the cutting and cut me to pieces. Just when I was about to start running, I saw a flashing blue light of a police vehicle in the distance.

On the way to the Kenton on Sea police station, I asked the constable: “Why do you think they didn’t attack me? I mean they were standing up there with machetes, axes and knives.”

He grinned: “No man, they weren’t interested in you. They wanted the cow. They gonna eat well for the next few days!”

[Scrat]

An episode similar to this happened to me many years ago. I was on highway 2 in between Kalispell and Libby Montana. I was familiar with the area having spent a large part of my teen years in Kali. I knew of men who had put their children through college towing people who were dumb enough to drive this particular stretch of road at a high speed at dusk, just as whole herds of deer are trekking from the lowlands to the mountain sides seeking cover in the brush.

I was in the last fraction of a 4 day drive from Pennsylvania, eager to be home with my parents and friends, it was about 8 at night and.............dusk. Anyway I was doing about 85mph and I came around a sloping corner where a local farmer has his fields bordered by woodland mountain sides. Right in front of me was 4 to 6 deer in my lane, I swerved to the left in a blink of an eye only to have several more jump from the left ditch into my path. I don't recall events in the split seconds after that, I ended up in the ditch with a deer halfway through the windshield and another on the road. I got out and sat on the side of the ditch I had blood on my face and hands. Apparently the farmer was sitting in his living room with his tow truck warmed up and a hot line to 911 because it was no more than 5 minutes before he showed up and 10 before the Sheriff did. Ironically a driver I had passed a few miles up the road stopped too. He was from Maine and told me it was foolish to drive so fast. Go figure.

I was pissed, I knew better than to drive like that around the area at night. My car was trashed and I had just paid it off 9 months earlier. I was taken to the emergency room in Libby Mt by the Sheriff who knew my father. My parents showed up and after finding out I was ok except for glass in the face and getting bounced around proceeded to verbally beat me without mercy for my stupidity. For the next few days I felt like an NFL tackling dummy too.

All said, I know there are still tow truck drivers eating well along that road too. And they don't carry machetes, just credit card machines.

[jones jones]

All said, I know there are still tow truck drivers eating well along that road too. And they don't carry machetes, just credit card machines

Love this!!

We got 'em here too. They get to every crash site before the cops or the ambulance!!

[Snowfire]

I nearly drove into a kudu crossing the road in Zimbabwe, some years ago. Missed him by a whisker

[jones jones]

Snowfire;1421410 wrote: I nearly drove into a kudu crossing the road in Zimbabwe, some years ago. Missed him by a whisker


Lucky you did! Kudu always jump into the road when they see car headlights. Don't ask why but I know there is a reason for it. Between Nelson Madela Bay and Cradock, which is in the Karroo, they cause many fatalities especially at night.

[Saint_]

I went up to Colorado the other weekend to have dinner at the casino and we nearly hit a deer. They are allover the road up there.

[Lady J]

Great SS JJ!

Enjoyed it. You should post more of your short stories .:-4

Lady J

[Lady J]

Scrat;1421406 wrote: An episode similar to this happened to me many years ago. I was on highway 2 in between Kalispell and Libby Montana. I was familiar with the area having spent a large part of my teen years in Kali. I knew of men who had put their children through college towing people who were dumb enough to drive this particular stretch of road at a high speed at dusk, just as whole herds of deer are trekking from the lowlands to the mountain sides seeking cover in the brush.

I was in the last fraction of a 4 day drive from Pennsylvania, eager to be home with my parents and friends, it was about 8 at night and.............dusk. Anyway I was doing about 85mph and I came around a sloping corner where a local farmer has his fields bordered by woodland mountain sides. Right in front of me was 4 to 6 deer in my lane, I swerved to the left in a blink of an eye only to have several more jump from the left ditch into my path. I don't recall events in the split seconds after that, I ended up in the ditch with a deer halfway through the windshield and another on the road. I got out and sat on the side of the ditch I had blood on my face and hands. Apparently the farmer was sitting in his living room with his tow truck warmed up and a hot line to 911 because it was no more than 5 minutes before he showed up and 10 before the Sheriff did. Ironically a driver I had passed a few miles up the road stopped too. He was from Maine and told me it was foolish to drive so fast. Go figure.

I was pissed, I knew better than to drive like that around the area at night. My car was trashed and I had just paid it off 9 months earlier. I was taken to the emergency room in Libby Mt by the Sheriff who knew my father. My parents showed up and after finding out I was ok except for glass in the face and getting bounced around proceeded to verbally beat me without mercy for my stupidity. For the next few days I felt like an NFL tackling dummy too.

All said, I know there are still tow truck drivers eating well along that road too. And they don't carry machetes, just credit card machines.


Scrat....I have been there myself and have hit a few deers. Road Kill = great meals for some!

[Scrat]

Those were the only deer I have ever hit, there have been several close calls though. The only other thing I have ever hit was a lab that jumped out in front of me one morning in Milton Wa. Nothing I could do, it was like he had a death wish. He literally jumped onto the road out of some bushes, all I heard was a loud thump. I stopped up the road and got out and walked down to him, he was on the side of the road stone dead. No one around, no collar on the dog. I looked at the truck, no damage. I called the shop and told them what happened and went on my way. Sad.

[Lady J]

Scrat;1421499 wrote: Those were the only deer I have ever hit, there have been several close calls though. The only other thing I have ever hit was a lab that jumped out in front of me one morning in Milton Wa. Nothing I could do, it was like he had a death wish. He literally jumped onto the road out of some bushes, all I heard was a loud thump. I stopped up the road and got out and walked down to him, he was on the side of the road stone dead. No one around, no collar on the dog. I looked at the truck, no damage. I called the shop and told them what happened and went on my way. Sad.


Yes....very sad but not intended. Things happen.