I have a couple to start it off:
We had a practical joker for a Supply Sergeant in Germany.
When we were getting ready to go to the field on manuvers he would send a unsuspecting private to the motor pool to get a 55 gallon drum of "green smoke". He had it set up with the Motor Sergeant to tell him to go back and tell the Supply Sergeant that he didn't have green smoke, but that he had blue smoke...well you can figure how many trips to the motor pool this poor private made.
One time this same Supply Segeant told me (Medical Platoon Sergeant) that he read where they had made a refill liquid for those chemical lights that you pop and they glow green. The chemical was expensive and had to be ordered through medical channels since it was a chemical. Well, he convinced me to go to the Major to get authorization to order this non-existant chemical......I was quickly "dismissed"
Your turn
Bobby
Funny military stories !
Funny military stories !
My sister in law was stationed in Germany and they were on high alert because of bomb threats that had been made. In the postal office they had been told to look out for any packages which a/ ticked or b/ were strange smelling, greasy, or oddly wrapped.
There were two major alerts one when a ticking box was discovered the office was evacuated and then the bomb squad advanced slowly and the chimes of big ben rang out to greet them! Some idiot had posted a westmister chiming clock..
The second alert was the discovery of a very strange package which had a non-exsistent address on it, tied up with string and being both a bit greasy and smelly it too was investigated and discovered to be a package of bacon and sausages from a concerned mum to her son!
There were two major alerts one when a ticking box was discovered the office was evacuated and then the bomb squad advanced slowly and the chimes of big ben rang out to greet them! Some idiot had posted a westmister chiming clock..
The second alert was the discovery of a very strange package which had a non-exsistent address on it, tied up with string and being both a bit greasy and smelly it too was investigated and discovered to be a package of bacon and sausages from a concerned mum to her son!
Funny military stories !
I posted this to rj's thread but it should really be here...
Aboard a ship, I was making rounds in port when I came across the engine room watch sleeping soundly between the generators. He was on his back on the deck grating. I thought about waking him up and taking him to Captain’s Mast but then what I thought was a better idea came to mind. Taking him to Mast would have ended what had been shaping up to be a promising career.
I went to the level below where, through the grating, I could see him sleeping above. I found some tie wire (very thin and strong) and used it to carefully wire his belt and loops to the deck grating. I left and came back later to find him sheepishly busy and obviously waiting for the other shoe to drop. To this day, he doesn’t know. I only wish I could have stayed to watch him wake up…he probably had to take his pants off to get out of the predicament.
Aboard a ship, I was making rounds in port when I came across the engine room watch sleeping soundly between the generators. He was on his back on the deck grating. I thought about waking him up and taking him to Captain’s Mast but then what I thought was a better idea came to mind. Taking him to Mast would have ended what had been shaping up to be a promising career.
I went to the level below where, through the grating, I could see him sleeping above. I found some tie wire (very thin and strong) and used it to carefully wire his belt and loops to the deck grating. I left and came back later to find him sheepishly busy and obviously waiting for the other shoe to drop. To this day, he doesn’t know. I only wish I could have stayed to watch him wake up…he probably had to take his pants off to get out of the predicament.
Schooling results in matriculation. Education is a process that changes the learner.
Funny military stories !
Clint, That was so funny!:wah:
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Accountable
- Posts: 24818
- Joined: Mon May 30, 2005 8:33 am
Funny military stories !
I was stationed in RAF Greenham Common, UK. We were slated to draw down & close the base, so all our vehicles had to be spotlessly cleaned for shipment to other countries. We parked clean vehicles inside aircraft hangars and maneuvering was really tight.
I was spotting (guiding) a 5-ton truck backing out of one hangar when suddenly I got drenched from behind. I imagined one of those gatorade moments from a football game, but the water kept pouring on me. It took a second to realize I'd stepped backward into one of those portable emergency showers! Stepping on the floorplate dumped cold water down my back. As I jumped out the truck almost ran me over. The driver was laughing so hard he forgot to hit the brakes!
I was spotting (guiding) a 5-ton truck backing out of one hangar when suddenly I got drenched from behind. I imagined one of those gatorade moments from a football game, but the water kept pouring on me. It took a second to realize I'd stepped backward into one of those portable emergency showers! Stepping on the floorplate dumped cold water down my back. As I jumped out the truck almost ran me over. The driver was laughing so hard he forgot to hit the brakes!
Funny military stories !
Accountable;779587 wrote: I was stationed in RAF Greenham Common, UK. We were slated to draw down & close the base, so all our vehicles had to be spotlessly cleaned for shipment to other countries. We parked clean vehicles inside aircraft hangars and maneuvering was really tight.
I was spotting (guiding) a 5-ton truck backing out of one hangar when suddenly I got drenched from behind. I imagined one of those gatorade moments from a football game, but the water kept pouring on me. It took a second to realize I'd stepped backward into one of those portable emergency showers! Stepping on the floorplate dumped cold water down my back. As I jumped out the truck almost ran me over. The driver was laughing so hard he forgot to hit the brakes!
That would have been a sight to see.:wah:
Thank you...your funny story may have solved a problem I've been working on. I laughed and slapped my forehead at the same time.
I was spotting (guiding) a 5-ton truck backing out of one hangar when suddenly I got drenched from behind. I imagined one of those gatorade moments from a football game, but the water kept pouring on me. It took a second to realize I'd stepped backward into one of those portable emergency showers! Stepping on the floorplate dumped cold water down my back. As I jumped out the truck almost ran me over. The driver was laughing so hard he forgot to hit the brakes!
That would have been a sight to see.:wah:
Thank you...your funny story may have solved a problem I've been working on. I laughed and slapped my forehead at the same time.
Schooling results in matriculation. Education is a process that changes the learner.
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LilacDragon
- Posts: 1382
- Joined: Wed Sep 28, 2005 4:23 am
Funny military stories !
Ok. This story is kind of long so bear with me.
When I was just a young thing, I was a supply troop in the Air Force stationed at Hill AFB, in Utah. After spending some time in Individual Equipment (passing out flight suits and thermal underwear) I was transferred to a "parts store" where parts for aircraft were issued, right on the runway.
For some time, the shop that I worked in had only been open until 11:00 pm but when I transferred to the shop (with a couple of other young Airmen), it was decided that we had the manpower to keep it open 24 hours.
I was the first person to work the overnight shift and I must assume that not everyone was notified of our extended hours.
So, there I sat. Alone. In a warehouse full of aircraft parts. In the silence. Reading a book. Waiting for the phone to ring.
About 2:00 am, there was a loud knock on the steel door at the back of the office. There was a grassy area at the back of the building and anyone wanting parts would have come to the front door of the warehouse. So, there was no way I was going to just open the door.
So I loudly asked "Who is there?" And the response was a lovely "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah" So I asked again and got the same response. Well, the cadence and the number of sylabols was the same as my commanding officer's name so I opened the door.
I about **** my pants!!
On the other side of the door was a very large black gun and a very large dog!! And two members of Security Police. (Which also fit the Blah Blah's had I been thinking along that line!)
Well, ID's were checked and phone calls were made so I didn't get shot. And shortly after Security police (and the dog and the gun!) left, the phone rang. It was the individual that called the SP's. He appologized profusely and from then on, I was well looked after when I worked the nightshift.
When I was just a young thing, I was a supply troop in the Air Force stationed at Hill AFB, in Utah. After spending some time in Individual Equipment (passing out flight suits and thermal underwear) I was transferred to a "parts store" where parts for aircraft were issued, right on the runway.
For some time, the shop that I worked in had only been open until 11:00 pm but when I transferred to the shop (with a couple of other young Airmen), it was decided that we had the manpower to keep it open 24 hours.
I was the first person to work the overnight shift and I must assume that not everyone was notified of our extended hours.
So, there I sat. Alone. In a warehouse full of aircraft parts. In the silence. Reading a book. Waiting for the phone to ring.
About 2:00 am, there was a loud knock on the steel door at the back of the office. There was a grassy area at the back of the building and anyone wanting parts would have come to the front door of the warehouse. So, there was no way I was going to just open the door.
So I loudly asked "Who is there?" And the response was a lovely "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah" So I asked again and got the same response. Well, the cadence and the number of sylabols was the same as my commanding officer's name so I opened the door.
I about **** my pants!!
On the other side of the door was a very large black gun and a very large dog!! And two members of Security Police. (Which also fit the Blah Blah's had I been thinking along that line!)
Well, ID's were checked and phone calls were made so I didn't get shot. And shortly after Security police (and the dog and the gun!) left, the phone rang. It was the individual that called the SP's. He appologized profusely and from then on, I was well looked after when I worked the nightshift.
Sandi