what is normal

Discuss Mental Health topics & issues.
Carl44
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what is normal

Post by Carl44 »

guys what is normal simple question ... but how do you know if you have had a breakdown ... does the very fact that you can still ask yourself this very question mean that your OK or not ?



its only the fact that on a post similar to this one the other dat i realised i was not alone there are more nuts on here than in a squirrels drey (nest)



but what happened not the reason but what



after a few em rather unfortunate things in my life i got depressed and was probably quite ill , the first thing that made me think uh oh was i kept seeing bugs like stage beatles out of the corner of my eye then when i turned to look at them of course they were not there .. an ex of mine used to have voices even the birds in the trees used to scream horrible things to her honest

about 4 months ago i found out my daughter had been raped left for dead

and was in a mental hospital i cant tell you how much this upset me i felt ill

beyond belief as i sat there a few days later the bugs came back i knew i had to chill out and quick for my little girl needed me i managed to sort my head out and flew to the states

last night my ex made a whole can of nasty open up on me about my daughter i was sitting down stairs unable to sleep scared to open my eyes in case the bugs were there i realise now i have divulged this information replies to my posts could be a bit thin on the ground but i need to know has any one else had an experience like this what did you do about it and how does it affect you now ..... oh and by the way no bugs today ...so far:-3
pantsonfire321@aol.com
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Post by pantsonfire321@aol.com »

jimbo wrote: guys what is normal simple question ... but how do you know if you have had a breakdown ... does the very fact that you can still ask yourself this very question mean that your OK or not ?



its only the fact that on a post similar to this one the other dat i realised i was not alone there are more nuts on here than in a squirrels drey (nest)



but what happened not the reason but what



after a few em rather unfortunate things in my life i got depressed and was probably quite ill , the first thing that made me think uh oh was i kept seeing bugs like stage beatles out of the corner of my eye then when i turned to look at them of course they were not there .. an ex of mine used to have voices even the birds in the trees used to scream horrible things to her honest

about 4 months ago i found out my daughter had been raped left for dead

and was in a mental hospital i cant tell you how much this upset me i felt ill

beyond belief as i sat there a few days later the bugs came back i knew i had to chill out and quick for my little girl needed me i managed to sort my head out and flew to the states

last night my ex made a whole can of nasty open up on me about my daughter i was sitting down stairs unable to sleep scared to open my eyes in case the bugs were there i realise now i have divulged this information replies to my posts could be a bit thin on the ground but i need to know has any one else had an experience like this what did you do about it and how does it affect you now ..... oh and by the way no bugs today ...so far:-3


Fellow nut nut reporting in ... ;)

Jim, its sounds like youve had more to deal with in your life than most and I HAVE THE UPMOST RESPECT FOR YOU . My one fear in life is for my daughter i could not cope if my daughter had been violated - your a better man( ok woman) than me .I don't have any answers ,i don't see bugs but then i keep reptiles and we always have escapees running all over the house.:rolleyes: All i can say is... your not alone :)
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Supersilly@rse
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Post by Supersilly@rse »

This is your body telling you that you're not ok, and that you need to give yourself some time/ headspace to deal with all of this.

If I'm right, (and I'm fairly intuitive) I would guess that you've probably not dealt properly with any of this ****...which means it's all still there bubbling there under the surface.

I had a period of mental illness for about 7 years and one of the symptoms were halucinations. I saw a variety of things from mechanical spiders, to my own face in flames in front of me......

You may be interested to know that seeing a beetle in a dream or hallucination is supposed to be symbolic of destructive aspects in your life, possibly the little things ignored until they have become too destructive.

I think that speaks volumes.
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Nomad
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Post by Nomad »

what is normal



Im not sure I qualify as a proper source of whats normal and what isnt:D but.........

If your seeing things your having hallucinations. Thats a fact. Thats not to be toyed with. I witnessed my mother having hallucinations and when I told her the bugs werent there she said I was crazy. That was very scary and unsettling. You need to see a doctor Jimbo. Thats the bottom line. Have Suzy take you. Today.
I AM AWESOME MAN
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weber
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Post by weber »

jimbo wrote: guys what is normal simple question ... but how do you know if you have had a breakdown ... does the very fact that you can still ask yourself this very question mean that your OK or not ?






Hi Jim

I don't think there is any such thing as normal.

I think there is natural, natural to the experiences you have had, natural to your life. The reactions you had I would say were quite natural for what happened to you and all those things go away when you are feeling more relaxed.
miriam:yh_flower



Making the simple complicated is commonplace; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, that's creativity.

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Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

thanks guys i'm not seeing bugs now and i know i never really saw them i just thought i did ,when i used to see them out of the corner of my eye i knew they were not really there but i had to look properly oh i cant explain it



its like a minute ago i saw this huge bug on the road i said to my self there is no bug it is not there . i opened my eyes and it had got bigger and closer i closed my eyes and said to myself there is no bug it is not there i opened my eyes and it had got much bigger and much closer i closed my eyes again and screamed to myself there is no bug i am imagining it



i opened my eyes and nearly got ran over by a woman driving a volkswagen

had you going there didn't i ha ha
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weber
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Post by weber »

You did have me going Jim.

You're just lucky that Volkswagen didn't eat you up.:driving: :D
miriam:yh_flower



Making the simple complicated is commonplace; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, that's creativity.

.................Charles Mingus



http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?
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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

flopstock wrote: So, this wasn't a serious thread? OOPs, sorry to have intruded..:lips:


Hiya Floopy :)

I think it was serious

But you know our Jimbo

He has to infuse each thread with a touch of humor

That's just his way :-6
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Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

flopstock wrote: So, this wasn't a serious thread? OOPs, sorry to have intruded..:lips:


sorry floppy its so serios it hurts just me tryin to make people not think i'm a total nut :(
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Bored_Wombat
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Post by Bored_Wombat »

Hi Jimbo.

That's a truly horrible story about your daughter, mate.

I don't know what to say, but my sympathies.

...

That said, there's every reason to talk to a councillor or something like that, because what's happened is really ****ing horrible.

Lots of people get hallucinations, and not lots of people have to live through seeing their children so badly hurt by some things that are still probably passing as people. Corner of the eye stuff is pretty mild. I wouldn't worry about it too much.

But if worry about seeing them is affecting you, that may be symptomatic of some very minor responses considering what you're going through, and a proper shrink might be a good idea ... if that makes sense:

I mean just depression can take a form called masked depression where you don't feel depressed. Hallucinations can be symptomatic of this, but if they're visual (which is rare), it's not usually stage beetles; you see morbid stuff like coffins, or dead relatives. And corner of the eye stuff can just be due to not enough sleep due to jet lag and a noisy head.

However concerns about not being sane can be symptomatic of depression. So if you're spending much time hoping not to see the hallucinations, that might be worth getting a pro to help with.

...

But, auē, hearing about your daughter is really distressing for me - I can't begin to imagine what you are going through. I'm really sorry, mate.
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

Bored_Wombat wrote: Hi Jimbo.



That's a truly horrible story about your daughter, mate.

I don't know what to say, but my sympathies.



...



That said, there's every reason to talk to a councillor or something like that, because what's happened is really ****ing horrible.



Lot's of people get hallucinations, corner of the eye stuff is pretty mild. I wouldn't worry about it too much.



But if worry about seeing them is affecting you, that may be symptomatic of some very minor responses considering what you're going through, and a proper shrink might be a good idea ... if that makes sense:



I mean just depression can take a form called masked depression where you don't feel depressed. Hallucinations can be symptomatic of this, but if they're visual (which is rare), it's not usually stage beetles; you see morbid stuff like coffins, or dead relatives. And corner of the eye stuff can just be due to not enough sleep due to jet lag and a noisy head.



However concerns about not being sane can be symptomatic of depression. So if you're spending much time hoping not to see the hallucinations, that might be worth getting a pro to help with.



...



But, auē, hearing about your daughter is really distressing for me - I can't begin to imagine what you are going through. I'm really sorry, mate.


thanks bored w if you read the rest of my threads have had a pretty tough ten years i'm not seeing anything now and to be honest its not easy to admit you have but i don't feel ashamed its something that happened i feel weak but i don't feel shame my ex told me about stuff that happened to her and to be honest i respected her for getting better and being the person she is today



by the way you did realise in my previous post that a volkswagen bug is a car yeah ... thanks for taking the trouble to post
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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

Bored_Wombat wrote: But, auē, hearing about your daughter is really distressing for me - I can't begin to imagine what you are going through. I'm really sorry, mate.


Hi BW :)

It is so sad, isn't it? Jimbo has talked about it in other threads. What I think is amazing is that he is STILL able to find the humor and joy and laughter in life.

Jimbo, I find you inspiring :-6
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Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

cherandbuster wrote: Hi BW :)



It is so sad, isn't it? Jimbo has talked about it in other threads. What I think is amazing is that he is STILL able to find the humor and joy and laughter in life.



Jimbo, I find you inspiring :-6
thanks cher coming from you thats lovely i've got to ring my daughter in 10 mins to see if she can spend chrimbo with us ,and see her brothers and sister for the first time , i'm so nervouse i feel sick please keep your fingers crossed for us i have a horrible feeling her mom has led us all on and now she will throw a spanner in the works



cher = more than special :-6
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cherandbuster
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Post by cherandbuster »

jimbo wrote: thanks cher coming from you thats lovely i've got to ring my daughter in 10 mins to see if she can spend chrimbo with us ,and see her brothers and sister for the first time , i'm so nervouse i feel sick please keep your fingers crossed for us i have a horrible feeling her mom has led us all on and now she will throw a spanner in the works



cher = more than special :-6


Aw Jimbo

Wishing you extra special luck with the phone call

I hope she gets to find out first hand

How lucky she is to have you in her life :-4
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PASSION
!:guitarist





Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

Diuretic wrote: I finally knew I was suffering depression when my boss told me I obviously didn't give a rat's about work or anything else. He was right. For someone who always loved his work and enjoyed going to work it was obvious to anyone else that something was wrong. I didn't realise it until it was pointed out to me. I went to my GP after doing an online evaluation http://www.beyondblue.org/

I then went to a psychologist. Thankfully I'm out of it now but it was pretty crappy for a long time.


:(

crap i need a docs appointment
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

Diuretic wrote: jimbo if it helps, I am very glad I went. I look back at me back then and I think "what the hell was I doing???" It took a long while but it helped me out a great deal.
i will be honest i do feel ok i just feel tired i'm not sleeping for some reason i just stopped going out and taking calls off of friends but i forced myself to go out tonight

now i know there could be a prob i will chill out i've been through a lot and if any one could get through it unscathed they would have to be a very cold individual

i'm not doing strange things i'm just tired of fighting for so very long against so very much thats all :)
RedGlitter
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Post by RedGlitter »

jimbo wrote: i will be honest i do feel ok i just feel tired i'm not sleeping for some reason i just stopped going out and taking calls off of friends but i forced myself to go out tonight




Hi Jimbo,



Sometimes mental stuff (depression, breakdown, whatever it may be) happens without you being aware of it. What you said up there ^^ tends to make me think this might be happening in your case. I have a lot of personal experience with depression myself. Often I have read your posts about the stuff that's happened to you and your loved ones and I wonder how it is you can hold up and have held up under all of it. I have no doubt at all that you are a strong man but even the strongest among us can only take so much before something has to give. Sometimes you think you're doing okay but the whole time, it's in the back of your head, needling at you until it finally wears you down and you are forced to get help. Talk to someone. A professional. Seriously, you've got us and your Suzy but you may need more than just a loving ear. I think Nomad said it best. :)
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

thanks red you are such a lovely person 'the thing is with the bug episode it was a stage in my life when i was under intense pressure in every way



i knew the bugs were not there but i thought i could see them out of the corner of my eye



i went to the docs and told him what was happening in my life multiple deaths etc and he just wrote me off for a year



at the end of the day if you could go through deaths, daughter being taken from your life girlfriend nearly dying 4 times and being pretty much crippled because of a hospital blunder without being affected you would be a very shallow person



there are other things that have happened i cant even tell sue let alone this forum , i feel much better today



the day before yesterday my ex deliberately went out of way to ruin any chance of me having a proper relationship with my daughter .. i just found that hard to take and could not sleep for a few days thats all



the post what is normal was meant as i think i was ill i'm OK now what happened when you where ill ... i just wanted to know if other people;had the same experience .... confused i know i am :wah:
RedGlitter
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Post by RedGlitter »

I see now Jimbo. I'm sorry I misunderstood. :) I do remember that post about your daughter from the other day. Certainly that would upset anyone. I still think for all you've been through that you have one heck of a personality. There's practically a Jimbo Fan Club in here! Thank you for your nice compliment. You are very kind.

:-6
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

thanks red i like loads of people here too



and i'm a signed up member of the red glitter fan club :-4
RedGlitter
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Post by RedGlitter »

*Awwww!* Thank you! :-6 :o :)
Indian Princess
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Post by Indian Princess »

What is normal?



- Normal is each individuals perception of reality, there are as many answeres as there are perceptions.
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

Indian Princess;556871 wrote: What is normal?







- Normal is each individuals perception of reality, there are as many answeres as there are perceptions.


ok thats a good answer



ok then what is abnormal
RedGlitter
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Post by RedGlitter »

jimbo;556872 wrote: ok thats a good answer



ok then what is abnormal


Here's where we need Coberst! :)

I think many people fall into the abnormal category but I think the question is too far out of reach to just have a pat answer.

I had a lovely answer going but then I dug myself into a hole. :o I think there are as many variations of normal and abnormal as there are people to demonstrate them. If we say normalcy is just our perception of reality then that could mean we're saying the child molester who thinks he's normal...is... or that if I wear a snorkel to the store because I think I will drown on the way over I am normal because I preceive it to be. Poor examples perhaps but I just woke up.

Maybe I'm abnormal because I have a mental illness but then wouldn't I be just as abnormal for having diabetes too? It's just a different body part.

I'm sure there is a textbook explanation for what is normal and abnormal but I just don't have it.

But for my money, you're normal Jimbo and I am too. :)
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

[quote=RedGlitter;556877]Here's where we need Coberst! :)

I think many people fall into the abnormal category but I think the question is too far out of reach to just have a pat answer.

I had a lovely answer going but then I dug myself into a hole. :o I think there are as many variations of normal and abnormal as there are people to demonstrate them. If we say normalcy is just our perception of reality then that could mean we're saying the child molester who thinks he's normal...is... or that if I wear a snorkel to the store because I think I will drown on the way over I am normal because I preceive it to be. Poor examples perhaps but I just woke up.



Maybe I'm abnormal because I have a mental illness but then wouldn't I be just as abnormal for having diabetes too? It's just a different body part.



I'm sure there is a textbook explanation for what is normal and abnormal but I just don't have it.



But for my money, you're normal Jimbo and I am too. /quote]



thats a great answer red g , well if your normal and i'm normal what the hell are us two doing hanging out with a load of weirdo's on f g ??:wah: :wah:
RedGlitter
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Post by RedGlitter »

jimbo;556878 wrote: [quote=RedGlitter;556877]Here's where we need Coberst!

I think many people fall into the abnormal category but I think the question is too far out of reach to just have a pat answer.

I had a lovely answer going but then I dug myself into a hole. :o I think there are as many variations of normal and abnormal as there are people to demonstrate them. If we say normalcy is just our perception of reality then that could mean we're saying the child molester who thinks he's normal...is... or that if I wear a snorkel to the store because I think I will drown on the way over I am normal because I preceive it to be. Poor examples perhaps but I just woke up.



Maybe I'm abnormal because I have a mental illness but then wouldn't I be just as abnormal for having diabetes too? It's just a different body part.



I'm sure there is a textbook explanation for what is normal and abnormal but I just don't have it.



But for my money, you're normal Jimbo and I am too. /quote]



thats a great answer red g , well if your normal and i'm normal what the hell are us two doing hanging out with a load of weirdo's on f g ??:wah: :wah:


Umm...hmm...improving their image?? :wah:
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

RedGlitter;556880 wrote: [quote=jimbo;556878]



Umm...hmm...improving their image?? :wah:


your damn right we are :yh_dance :yh_giggle :yh_tong2
RedGlitter
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Post by RedGlitter »

:wah: :-4
Carl44
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Post by Carl44 »

Diuretic;556922 wrote: It's easier to talk about "deviance" than "normality". Anyway that's what Emile Durkheim told us. He said the only way a society knows what's normal is to look at what it regards as "deviant" - that is deviating from the norm. In truth then normality is socially defined but even in a given society it changes through time, it's not a fixed notion.



I suppose that muddies the waters nicely :D




hey red glitter , does this post make him one of us or one of them , its deliberately confusing :wah: :wah: :wah:
RedGlitter
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Post by RedGlitter »

He's one of us, Jimbo! :)

I think I get what Di is saying...it is easy to recongnize deviancy in our society, we usually know it when we see it. Example might be child molesters. We normal people (and some weirdos) know that's wrong and that will never change. Molesters harm others in society. But if we take, say, homosexuality which used to be considered deviant in many circles (but not all and this is only an example) and was once considered by many to be abnormal or wrong, it is now becoming more socially acceptable and society is learning that it is not deviant. Or at least we are being told that. There was a time when being gay would put you into a mental institution because you were "not normal" but now that would never happen. It is not a threat to society.

I am sure there are more examples but that's what was on the top of my head.

I don't know, am I close?? :confused:
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crazygal
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Post by crazygal »

What is normal??????????

What wouldn't be normal is for what you have been through not to affect you, then I'd be worried.
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Post by koan »

FLASHES AND FLOATERS



The vitreous is a gel-like material that fills the inside of the eye. The clear vitreous is mostly water and plays an important role in maintaining the transparency and natural shape of the eye. As we age, there is a natural tendency to get small particles, which “float” in the vitreous and cast a very small dark shadow or spot on the retina. Because our eyes are constantly moving, the floaters seem to jump back and forth. Floaters tend to be a nuisance but there is no real treatment unless they become visually disabling. The vitreous continues to change as we go through life and a consequence of the normal, natural process of aging is the posterior separation of the vitreous. With age, the vitreous turns from its natural gel formation to more of a watery consistency as the collagen starts to break down. This causes a natural separation of the vitreous at the back of the eye where it has an attachment around the optic nerve. Once this attachment separates, it is then free to float back and forth in our vision. This attachment produces a relatively large floater in the shape of a circle, half moon or spider web and many patients complain of seeing “bugs” scooting across the floor. With the constant movement of the eyes, the vitreous attachment around its peripheral base produces mild tugging or traction on the retina. This in-turn creates a flash of light or lightning bolt seen in one or both eyes. In most cases the vitreous completely separates and the flashing lights subside. However, if the attachment is too strong, a tear or small hole is created. If the liquid vitreous gets through the hole, then a retinal detachment occurs. That is why it is very important to have a dilated eye examination for flashes and floaters. If your Ophthalmologist finds a small hole or tear in the retina, but no detachment has occurred, then laser can be used to “spot-weld” the retina around the hole and seal it off. However, if the retina is partially detached, the patient sees a very dark shadow or balloon like someone has pulled a veil or curtain over part of their vision then surgery would be required to repair the hole and drain the fluid. So the signs and symptoms of a retinal detachment include: a new onset of floaters, with or without flashing lights and a curtain or veil covering part of your vision. Most flashes and floaters are harmless, but the only way to know for sure is to see your eye doctor (M.D.) right away. Early prevention is important. You only have two eyes. It’s up to you, with the help of your qualified doctor, to take good care of your eyes and maintain sight for life.

source

Probably a good idea to get an eye exam. I see bugs in my peripheral vision all the time. I've not gone blind yet. I think stress or anxiety can make it worse. I also have fun watching the air so I'd not call myself normal either.
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Post by Indian Princess »

I beleive that 'NORMAL' is an individuals perception of reality
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kazalala
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Post by kazalala »

JIm. I cant really think of anything constructive or intelligent to say here. I am just so struck by your pain, and strength. I am glad to hear you are feeling slightly better (not seeing bugs). It must have been so scary for you:thinking: I am praying so hard that things start loking up for you and Suzy:yh_hugs




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