Texas will survive the November Election

[Tombstone]

Texas will survive the November Election



Please note that Texas is the only state with a legal right to secede from

the Union (please refer to the Texas-American Annexation Treaty of 1848).

We Texans love y'all, but we'll have to take action if Kerry wins

president over Bush.

We'll miss you too. Texas has given all those complainers plenty of time

to get used to the results. After seeing the whiners along the campaign

route, the folks from Texas are considering taking matters into our their

hands. Here is our solution:

#1: Let John Kerry become President of the United States. (all 49 states.)

#2: George W. Bush becomes the President of the Republic of Texas.

So what does Texas have to do to survive as a Republic?

1. NASA is just south of Houston, Texas. (we will control the space industry.)

2. We refine over 85% of the gasoline in the United States.

3. Defense Industry. (we have over 65% of it) The term "Don't

mess with Texas," will take on a whole new meaning.

4. Oil - we can supply all the oil that the Republic of Texas

will need for the next 300 years. Yankee states? Sorry about that.

5. Natural Gas - Again we have all we need and it's too bad

about those northern states. John Kerry will figure a way to keep them

warm...

6. Computer Industry - we currently lead the nation in producing

computer chips and communications: Small places like Texas Instruments, Dell Computer, EDS, Raytheon, National Semiconductor, Motorola, Intel, AMD, Atmel, Applied Materials, Ball Semiconductor, Dallas Semiconductor, Delphi, Nortel, Alcatel, Etc, Etc. The list goes on and on.

7. Health Centers - We have the largest research centers for

Cancer research, the best burn centers and the top trauma units in

the world and other large health planning centers.

8. We have enough colleges to keep us going: UT., Texas A&M,

Texas Tech, Rice, SMU, University of Houston, Baylor, UNT, Texas

Women's University, etc. Ivy grows better in the south anyway.

9. We have a ready supply of workers. (just open the border when

we need some more).

10. We have control of the paper industry, plastics, insurance,

etc.

11. In case of a foreign invasion, we have the Texas National Guard

and the Texas Air National Guard. We don't have an army but since

everybody down here has at least six rifles and a pile of ammo, we can

raise an army in 24 hours if we need it. If the situation really gets

bad, we can always call Department of Public Safety and ask them to send

over a couple Texas Rangers.

12. We are totally self sufficient in beef, poultry, hogs and

several types of grain, fruit and vegetables and lets not forget

seafood from the gulf. And everybody down here knows how to cook them so

that they taste good. Don't need any food.

This just names a few of the items that will keep the Republic

of Texas in good shape.

There isn't a thing out there that we need and don't have.

Now to the rest of the United States under President Kerry:

Since you won't have the refineries to get gas for your cars,

only President Kerry will be able to drive around in his 9 mile per gallon

SUV. The rest of the United States will have to walk or ride bikes.



You won't have any TV, as the space center in Houston will cut off your

communications. You won't have any natural gas to heat your homes but

since Mr. Kerry has predicted global warming, you will not need the gas.

Signed,

The People in Texas

[Clint]

When I was in Alaska in the early 80s there was a joke going around up there:

If a Texas oil man and a Louisiana oil man jump off the Empire State Building at the same time, which one will hit the ground first?

Answer: Who cares?

Obviously, they didn’t know what Tombstone knows.

[capt_buzzard]

Texas did survive. :guitarist :guitarist :guitarist

[gmc]

Met two texans once, they were pushing mountain bikes up a mountain pass in the middle of the highlands. Thought the rain and the cold was wonderful and were enjoying their first experience of hypothermia otherwise they seemed perfectly normal to me. Shorter than I expected

[capt_buzzard]

The Texas Ranger Rides Again. :driving: :wah: