The ant and the grasshopper

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BabyRider
Posts: 10163
Joined: Sun Jan 02, 2005 1:00 pm

The ant and the grasshopper

Post by BabyRider »

ORIGINAL VERSION:



The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying in supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.



MODERN VERSION:



The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying in supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.



Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well-fed while others are cold and starving.



CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor

grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?



Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house, where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."



Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of Federal judges that Bill had appointed from a list of single parent welfare recipients.

The ant loses the case.



The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow.



The grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.



God Bless America

[FONT=Arial Black]I hope you cherish this sweet way of life, and I hope you know that it comes with a price.
~Darrel Worley~
[/FONT]










Bullet's trial was a farce. Can I get an AMEN?????


We won't be punished for our sins, but BY them.




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pina
Posts: 2006
Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2005 1:52 pm

The ant and the grasshopper

Post by pina »

Thats brilliant BR, enjoyed reading that:wah:















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Accountable
Posts: 24818
Joined: Mon May 30, 2005 8:33 am

The ant and the grasshopper

Post by Accountable »

:guitarist See? You don't have to club someone over the head to make your point, just a well placed barb or two will do.



Excellent job! :driving:
scenerio
Posts: 124
Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2005 11:16 am

The ant and the grasshopper

Post by scenerio »

man that was pretty good,

did you make that up your self?

if you did BRAVO(claping hands and whistleing);)
In between the world of dreams,its all just shadows and light
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Betty Boop
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Joined: Sun Mar 27, 2005 1:17 pm
Location: The end of the World

The ant and the grasshopper

Post by Betty Boop »

Very good,

hey I could nick that, change a few names and end it with 'God Bless Great Britain!!'
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