Christmas '07 is over?

katjan · Post by **katjan** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 12:31 pm

So, I'm new at this & may be in the wrong place, but I'm looking for suggestions on how to have an enjoyable few hours with my family at Christmas time. I am a 50+ yr. old mom of 2 grown sons, both divorced, & have 2 young grandchildren, senior citizen age in-laws, & a husband. It seems that for the past several years, I have worked myself silly, getting ready for our family Christmas, only to have it come & go before I even have time to sit down & eat my dinner! I usually have around 12 people for "the big meal", & gift exhange, and it seems that there is never enough time to just enjoy being with my family. Maybe it is just our family, but it is always so chaotic. Any suggestions will be welcome.

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 12:37 pm

Hmm well I think the key think for Christmas is to just have fun and enjoy the day with your family, so that by the end of the day you can all say that you had a good time. I would talk to everyone that is coming and ask them for their suggestions as to what time dinner should be etc, and take it from there.

Most importantly don't get stressed over it, because no-one wants that, and even if it means having a smaller dinner, just chatting to your family or seeing the kids faces when they open their pressies will surely make the day worth it.

Oh and welcome to FG! :-6

Post by **spot** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 12:57 pm

chrisb84uk;783876 wrote: Most importantly don't get stressed over it, because no-one wants that, and even if it means having a smaller dinner, just chatting to your family or seeing the kids faces when they open their pressies will surely make the day worth it.

I'm not sure it works like that Chris. The dozen of them have a ritual day. Presumably katjan has done the obvious, years ago, and said that if the dish washing isn't done entirely and quickly by the males of the house then they'll have their throats cut before nightfall, and that's been taken on board and acted out for years. That doesn't solve the problem.

The problem is in part I suspect that the other eleven will, on occasion, go into katjan's kitchen between dawn and 2pm and offer to help cook this or that, or peel something, or stir a pot, but it hinders and clutters and annoys. She's had to do all the planning (and she's far better at it than they are from all the practice), she selected everything, she made sure nothing was missing, she spent hours shopping for ingredients, the last thing she's going to do is allow anyone else into her kitchen to wreck the meal.

I think there's two steps you can take, katjan. Firstly you can nominate any one other person for a given Christmas as your slave between dawn and 2pm to do your bidding hand and foot, that might amuse you. The second is that everyone else prepares the dining room and subsequently clears it and that from the moment you blow the whistle and everyone sits down, you're the first sat there. Nominate a serving committee to put the food out, to walk the dishes back and forth to the kitchen, to make sure nothing's left in the oven. You're first to sit, in the seat of honour, and they bring it all to you. From then until midnight you do nothing else at all except play with the children, watch the Christmas DVD of Choice and digest the meal. It's up to the others to get the evening meal ready, to put all the food properly in the fridge for Boxing Day, to walk the dog and wash the work surfaces properly. You're definitely stuck with the major effort until the meal starts, there's no changing that.

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:04 pm

Well who am I to disagree with you there Spot, you are certainly WAY more knowledgable than me!!

Post by **spot** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:14 pm

I make it up as I go along, I thought you knew that by now.

katjan · Post by **katjan** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:23 pm

OK, Spot, thank you for the suggestions. Assuming though, that none of these ideas are going to happen, is there anyone out there who has realistic ideas of activities (maybe games that the big ones & little ones can do together) that work for their family times together.

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:29 pm

Well we used to play party games with our grandparents on Christmas Day, things like a treasure hunt, (where you could even hide a present along with a new clue each time until the final big present at the end.) Or even pass the parcel, it may be an old game, but we found that it works well!

Omni_Skittles · Post by **Omni_Skittles** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:31 pm

oh oh i say charades but make rules and specific things for that cause it gets boring if everyone is just being dumb! that'll last about 30 minutes lol

Omni_Skittles · Post by **Omni_Skittles** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:39 pm

i loved being the new kid in my family! honestly though the grand parents make everything run! lol with out my mimi or grand-dad christmas would be insane!!!

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:39 pm

chrisb84uk;783976 wrote: Well we used to play party games with our grandparents on Christmas Day, things like a treasure hunt, (where you could even hide a present along with a new clue each time until the final big present at the end.) Or even pass the parcel, it may be an old game, but we found that it works well!

We used to do that for Easter....good suggestion Chris!:-4:-4

There are many games that the whole gang can play, that is all we do when we get together for holidays and on weekends with my parents...my dad has enough games to open up his own toy/game store! ---Well, we eat too....but that is a given. Some families (so I hear) don't play games when they get together, when my ex first met me and my family 20 years ago, he thought we were a bunch of crazy people playing Pictionary, Scategories and Trvia pursuit etc....(he wasn't far off, but in a fun way OF cours!!:wah:) Now, he loves to play games with his new wife and kids when they visit and doesn't think anything of it.....

sorry to go off topic...I'm really bad at that!--or I guess good at it, but its a bad thing.

:p

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:43 pm

Thanks Wendy - by the way haven't seen you in a long time, I hope you have been well!

Post by **spot** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:20 pm

katjan;783962 wrote: OK, Spot, thank you for the suggestions. Assuming though, that none of these ideas are going to happen, is there anyone out there who has realistic ideas of activities (maybe games that the big ones & little ones can do together) that work for their family times together.

That wasn't your original question. You said that "it seems that there is never enough time to just enjoy being with my family. Maybe it is just our family, but it is always so chaotic" and you need to make enough free time somehow during Christmas Day itself for you to be able to finally join in. All the games in the world are no use to you if you can't balance the workload and get out from under being the dogsbody.

kayleneaussie · Post by **kayleneaussie** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:41 pm

We have all the family plus any foster children I have in care and yes it does get busy until we finish eating but then the dishes are put in the dishwasher and everyone helps clean up. Over here its usually hot so the kids go in the pool and we sit in the yard watching them and relaxing and having a coolie

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:47 pm

I could never imagine a hot Christmas that would just be wierd!!

Patsy Warnick · Post by **Patsy Warnick** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:48 pm

Katjan

I'm glad C'mas '07 is over - why don't you & the rest of the Family all go & meet somewhere fun for C'mas ?

Make plans to meet & eat out so there's time to Chat & enjoy eachother.

Next Year its Vegas for me - lights are up 24/7...

P.S. - Welcome

Patsy

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:49 pm

Have a potluck Christmas dinner..........every household brings a covered dish. Less for you to cook. Buy pretty paper Christmas plates and cups and napkins............less dishes to wash.

If you have a printer,use a digital camera and have everyone, one or two at a time, pose for a Chrismas pic. Have a scrapbook on hand and some little decorations to put around the photo. Everyone gets a turn to decorate their own picture page.

Sing Christmas Carols together and have the tape running.

For the young children, have some crayons and a Christmas coloring book for each to keep them busy.

For the older children, bring out that old board game, dust it off, and let them play together.

All of this take a little planning ahead of time.

What you want to do is make a happy Christmas memory for your family.

Just take the day as it comes, relax, see what happens, and enjoy yourself.

I hope this helps.

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:51 pm

Patsy Warnick;784117 wrote: Katjan

I'm glad C'mas '07 is over - why don't you & the rest of the Family all go & meet somewhere fun for C'mas ?

Make plans to meet & eat out so there's time to Chat & enjoy eachother.

Next Year its Vegas for me - lights are up 24/7...

Patsy

That's a good idea, I know a lot of places may be closed, but you could find somewhere to go for an afternoon, do something a bit different perhaps!

Oh and Vegas for Christmas - you are SOOO lucky!!

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 3:25 pm

chrisb84uk;784013 wrote: Thanks Wendy - by the way haven't seen you in a long time, I hope you have been well!

I am fine and dandy Chris, its very nice to see you as always!!:-6:-6

chrisb84uk · Post by **chrisb84uk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 3:28 pm

WonderWendy3;784178 wrote: I am fine and dandy Chris, its very nice to see you as always!!:-6:-6

Thank you!

sunny_bunny · Post by **sunny_bunny** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 3:58 pm

along-for-the-ride;784121 wrote: Have a potluck Christmas dinner..........every household brings a covered dish. Less for you to cook. Buy pretty paper Christmas plates and cups and napkins............less dishes to wash.

If you have a printer,use a digital camera and have everyone, one or two at a time, pose for a Chrismas pic. Have a scrapbook on hand and some little decorations to put around the photo. Everyone gets a turn to decorate their own picture page.

Sing Christmas Carols together and have the tape running.

For the young children, have some crayons and a Christmas coloring book for each to keep them busy.

For the older children, bring out that old board game, dust it off, and let them play together.

All of this take a little planning ahead of time.

What you want to do is make a happy Christmas memory for your family.

Just take the day as it comes, relax, see what happens, and enjoy yourself.

I hope this helps.

I love Patsy's idea of booking a Christmas meal out so you all enjoy it and you don't have to worry about washing up, etc. but I suppose it depends on the ages of the grandkids. Little ones wouldn't want to sit for hours around a table just eating and chatting.

My suggestion would have been the same as AFTR's excellent suggestion. Get everyone to bring along a plate of food - arrange with them beforehand what they can bring. Also premake as much food as poss. and freeze it so it can be popped into an oven to simmer for a couple of hours or just be microwaved quickly. A dishwasher is a godsend - ask Santa for one!

Board games can be a lot of fun, as can card games. Monopoly is good for a long game and there is a trivial pursuit game available with separate questions for adults and kids. If the kids are younger, Uno is a fantastic game to play (buy the cards with pretty pictures on)

and Go Fish is also great fun.

If as Spottylicious says, you're spending too long in the kitchen being "supermum" and getting frustrated, then try to chill out on the supermum bit, let others help, don't aim for such a perfect day for everyone else - cos it's your day too! Relax, have a drinkie and join in the fun and chatter. I'm sure your family would rather see a relaxed and happy mum/nanny than a hot and frustrated supermum who lives in the kitchen at Crimbo!

Hope your next Crimbly Fest is much more relaxed and enjoyable.

Hugs to you hunny. :-4

(And quit working so hard - it makes the rest of us look bad!) :wah:

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 4:18 pm

katjan;783874 wrote: So, I'm new at this & may be in the wrong place, but I'm looking for suggestions on how to have an enjoyable few hours with my family at Christmas time. I am a 50+ yr. old mom of 2 grown sons, both divorced, & have 2 young grandchildren, senior citizen age in-laws, & a husband. It seems that for the past several years, I have worked myself silly, getting ready for our family Christmas, only to have it come & go before I even have time to sit down & eat my dinner! I usually have around 12 people for "the big meal", & gift exhange, and it seems that there is never enough time to just enjoy being with my family. Maybe it is just our family, but it is always so chaotic. Any suggestions will be welcome.

When it got to that point we arranged for Christmas lunch at a local eatery - there were enough of us that we got a room to ourselves, costs were shared and no preparation or clear-up afterwards.

The grandkids enjoyed being somewhere different with all their cousins and no-one had all the hassle and stress of doing it themselves - it was expensive though.

After a couple of years we moved back to gathering in family homes but as a rotation with everyone mucking in and a lot farer sharing of the workload.

Post by **spot** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 4:28 pm

Bryn Mawr;784209 wrote: and a lot farer sharing of the workload.
You unstacked a dishwasher??!

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 4:32 pm

spot;784212 wrote: You unstacked a dishwasher??!

:p

They turned their nose up at my deep fried turkey with plum duff compote!

katjan · Post by **katjan** » Tue Feb 26, 2008 8:34 pm

Thanks to everyone for their suggestions...I especially like the ideas from Along-For-The-Ride....this sounds like things we can do!

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 2:23 pm

katjan;785194 wrote: Thanks to everyone for their suggestions...I especially like the ideas from Along-For-The-Ride....this sounds like things we can do!

Your very welcome.

Glad to be of help.