The Absence Of Life.

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jones jones
Posts: 6601
Joined: Sat Jan 26, 2008 7:30 am

The Absence Of Life.

Post by jones jones »

This is the last piece in the trilogy ..."Love Lost, Found And Lost Again."

Once I lived in the land where Aphrodite was born

The land of the birth of Venus

That mysterious lover who turned herself into a bitch

Yet still chose to remain a virgin.



Now I find myself in a country of many terrors

Where men rise up against their fathers

Persecute their children and mutilate their lovers

Where barbarous stories are told of mans passion

And the voice of their god is unheard in the empty cities

For Satan is the father and is in possession.

I pray to the twelve Olympian gods and the god of the sky

To allow me to sing one last love song

And let me ride in the chariot of the sun in a shower of gold

For I have a morbid fear that the absence of life within me

Is because I died of grief when the bringer of light turned me
"…I hate how I don’t feel real enough unless people are watching." — Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters
Clodhopper
Posts: 5115
Joined: Mon Feb 25, 2008 5:11 pm

The Absence Of Life.

Post by Clodhopper »

Shyte poem. Totally derivative. (speaking as a lit crit)

I've posted my share. :wah:

But you are talking from the heart and credit to you for it.

Hmm. Like the first stanza, actually. That's the bit you meant and that really happened. The rest is you waxing consciously lyrical. Not as good.
The crowd: "Yes! We are all individuals!"

Lone voice: "I'm not."
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